AIBU to block him

[Whatisthis99]

First of all, I know I can block anyone for any reason, I think I just want confirmation that I'm not reading to much into it

I was out with my DC yesterday and they started playing with another child. Their dad and I ended up chatting whilst the kids were playing. He seemed nice, normal. Just before we left he asked for my number

We exchanged a few messages last night but i was busy with the DC so was slow with replies. His last message to me was asking if I'd like to go to another big city this weekend with all of our kids

I think that's too much for someone you've just met. It's over an hour away from our location travel wise

That's not my AIBU. My AIBU is 20 mind after the city message he messages again asking if I was still awake. Has messaged this morning saying good morning and then has messaged again about 20 mins ago asking if hes upset me.

AIBU to think this is excessive and the "have I upset you" Is a red flag for someone I met less than 24 hours ago?

As not to drip feed I was in a DV relationship for 7 years so I'm aware I might be reading too much into it, but then again, I might be right?

Block and delete

He seems to be making an effort romantically and then panicked that he moved too fast. I don’t think there’s anything else to read into it

I would probably just address it, saying’this is too much, I’m very busy. Etc.
but if you want to simply block, then go for it.
it’s way too much.

He seems super insecure/pushy by messaging you check if you're still awake just because you don't reply straight away. And also to see if you're upset with him because you didn't reply to his good morning message. It's a bad combination and can lead to behaviour that could be annoying at the least - abusive at the worst. It would be a huge no from me. Block away, you owe him nothing.

Good morning messages. So soon.

Argh. Yes block him.

Did he take your number because he's interested in getting to know you as a person? If so, the trip is too much too soon as you should get to know each other without the kids involved for ages yet.

If he was after a buddy to go out places with the kids then not so bad, but you should still start with short meet ups and build up to day trips.

With the messaging I'd probably tell him you're a busy mum and don't spend forever on your phone, so replies are only sent when you have free time.

Just be honest and tell him he’s being too full on, tell him you have a busy schedule and don’t have time to travel to another city to meet some guy you met at the park (or wherever it was).

He seems very insecure and very keen.

Are you attracted to him? Do you like him?
Other than the message spam, was there anything else you didn't like?

He sounds incredibly needy.

Either tell him he’s being a bit too full on and you like a more glacial pace (and less intensity) or block him.

What am I reading?? I’m shocked at some of the replies!

You just met the guy. YESTERDAY. He’s asked you to go somewhere for a weekend if I understand you correctly? He is bombarding you with messages.

No. No. No.

He's met you once and is bombarding you?

A few questions for consideration:
Are you interested in him? If so, are you both single?
If yes to both, up to you.
If no to either then any future meetings would be for the children's benefit. If this is the case then respond to say something like, I only exchanged numbers to facilitate the children meeting. This doesn't seem to be why you are contacting me.
If he persists then block, but on the vague chance that he's socially inept, it allows for clarity.

I would find this waaaay too much. As for whether to block him, I’d say just mute him if it’s likely to cause problems in your child’s friendship, but it sounds like the kids don’t know each other that well.

If you’re not sure about blocking, maybe you could send a very non-committal “Sorry, very busy right now, talk soon” message and then mute? Then check in a few days - if you’ve had a dozen “Where are you? Is everything okay? Have I done something wrong?” messages, you know to block for good.

Maybe he's just desperate to have someone to do stuff with the kids with? I'd just reply, I'm very busy but we could meet up at the park again in a week or two if you like? It gives him an idea of what's reasonable.

Nooo, he's already questioning why you haven't responded, it will only escalate. Put him in the bin

"Hi, I'm not big on random messaging, I just use it to confirm arrangements with the kids. Nothing personal!"

Block him. It is too much too soon

Absolutely this

I think the other behaviours is maybe orange flag if that's a thing?! Suggesting a big trip right away and messaging right away could be innocent trying to get more friends for the kids or he likes you but he's being a bit too keen and not great a reining himself in!

but the messaging again after 20 minutes because you haven't replied the day after you first met him - and then again the next day? That's just the reddest of flags!

Red flags a'waiving - I'd block

Firstly, YANBU. That is massive 🚩

If I expected to bump into him id fashion a polite but firm message to back off and then block

If I didn't think id see him again id block and be done with it

Yeah it's a bit much. He sounds mega needy.

Imagine what he'll be like after DTD and oxytocin is going on?

Just no

Why not reply to him? Even if it's just to say you're not interested. Just blocking is rude.