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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Difficult ex

2 replies

babynme · 05/09/2023 20:59

sorry this is a bit of a rant.

So my ex has very recently (last couple of weeks) started to see our 11 month old after being absent for 7 months. They’ve been seeing each other a couple of times a week, I’ve stayed for the majority of the time so baby would settle but the last visit I just dropped them off and left.

my ex has nothing in his house to occupy/look after our child. I told him I had toys in the car that I could get him and he told me it was alright and walked in with a newborn baby play mat thing and a couple of plastic balls🫠 he told me he was going to start getting a few bits for his house like clothes etc so the other day he took our child shopping and I received a text asking what size to buy. I replied with 9-12 months and later on that evening our child was brought home wearing 6-9 month babygrow with their poor little toes all bunched up 🥺 he said he looked at the 9-12 month clothes and they looked big so he decided to get 6-9 months. They outgrew 6-9 month clothes over 2 months ago 🫠

for dinner every day he has literally been making chicken nuggets and chips and for snacks he gives flaming hot cheetos puffs! I don’t have a problem with chicken nuggets occasionally but every night???? And the flaming hot Cheetos? The baby is 11 months old!

I asked if he could drop baby home at 8:00 for bed and he sent a message at 8:15 saying he was leaving soon, meaning that they didn’t get home until 8:45, he does not respect anything I say!

I feel like I’m the only one making an effort, I supplied everything he would need including car seat & high chair, I constantly ask when he is next seeing our child and the days when he isn’t it’s literally radio silence between us; he makes no effort to find out how his child is doing day to day. (the poor mite has hand, foot and mouth atm but he doesn’t know that and I’m not chasing him with this information). My mental health/stress levels were so much better when he was out of the picture I wish it could go back to that but I feel so selfish!!

sorry for the rant, if you’ve made it this far please can I have some advice on how to tackle this head on.

OP posts:
7yo7yo · 05/09/2023 21:10

Why are you encouraging him to see the child? Doesn’t sound like it’s in the best interests of the child!

babynme · 05/09/2023 21:12

@7yo7yo for some reason i felt as though i was the one standing in the way of their relationship so now I’m encouraging contact, he has other children who he has a relationship with/sees often and I don’t want my child to grow up with issues stemming from that or thinking they’re not good enough for their dad. I’m so lost atm

OP posts:
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