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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel frustrated so much has to be booked in advance these days?

240 replies

Teentrauma · 05/09/2023 07:17

I'm talking mainly attractions and days out. I've found that increasingly over the last few years and certainly since Covid many places require booking online in advance taking away spontanaety as they're often full up on the day. For example, tickets for a kids Father Christmas experience locally sold out within hours of tickets going on sale the other week - in August! We also booked to go up the Snowden railway - had to do in advance as wouldn't have got on otherwise. On the day, the weather was appalling and we wouldn't have gone if we didn't have tickets. We saw nothing and it was a total waste of money!

I get it's more efficient for the businesses and also takes away the need to queue. I'm probably a dinosaur but I hanker for the days when you could just decide to do things spur of the moment!

OP posts:
Crunchymum · 05/09/2023 08:10

You've always needed to book a slot at our local tip (well as long as I can remember - past 15 years or so)

I think on balance I prefer it. Nothing worse than deciding to go somewhere and there are queues round the block.

FreshStart12345 · 05/09/2023 08:11

I went to a festival at the start of the summer holidays. Haven't been to one for a good few years but was expecting to just turn up and enjoy all the activities but nope, most had to be booked in advance and had sold out before it even opened. Like how do you even do that? When you don't know the line up times, what happens if you book an activity right when your must see artist is on stage? How do you know what time you are going to wake up each day? What about the weather? It makes zero sense, festivals are about relaxing, going with the flow not about having alarm clocks and fixed schedules of booked activities
It just takes the fun out of it

Photio · 05/09/2023 08:11

Yes!! With outdoor stuff people don't want to go if it's pouring all day.
Big agricultural (obviously outdoor) show now must be booked in advance. Waited until a couple of days before to see what the weather would be like, and it was all sold out.
Been buying on the gate for years

PuttingDownRoots · 05/09/2023 08:11

Snowden and Father Christmas had to be booked when mine were little and my youngest is 10 years old.

In some ways I prefer it to turn up and queue. Take swimming... they can only fit a certain number in safely and its better than being turned away with excited children.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 05/09/2023 08:12

There is a mini golf place near us that don't take bookings, just show up and play. We love it and it's one of our go to places in nice weather now.

L1ttledrummergirl · 05/09/2023 08:12

I don't like having to plan everything in advance. You may want to go when you book it, but by the time the date comes, you've lost the excitement for it, so don't enjoy it as much.

I didn't want to swim in the outdoor pool last week, today would be nice. Its included in my gym membership, but I can't use it.

Whatswhatwhichiswhich · 05/09/2023 08:18

I prefer booking in advance but I can see that it must be frustrating to people that don’t like it.

hennybeans · 05/09/2023 08:18

My real annoyance with this is our local leisure centre. Last summer during the heatwave, I turned up on spec for a fun pool session with my two littlest.

Session fully booked. Of course. We went home. I returned 45 minutes later to collect teen from the gym, pool has 11 people in it! A huge leisure centre pool.

I asked the lady why the pool was practically empty when fully booked. Apparently they can’t help if people don’t show up for their bookings and Max capacity at a fun session is 20! Madness to turn away paying customers when your pool is half empty, and to have the limit 20 when the pool is very large.

Fizbosshoes · 05/09/2023 08:18

We have a sports facicility at a park near me. The council plan to close it because it costs too much to run bur they made it so difficult to book that people were unaware when/how to use it. Even members of the sports centre said it was impossible to book!

Thepeopleversuswork · 05/09/2023 08:19

One persons spontaneity is another’s chaos but I also understand having things planned could be another’s shackles.

So much this. A lot of this comes down to personality types. Your typical Type A person like my partner would have a meltdown at the concept of turning up to something on the off chance and trying to book. His entire calendar is blocked up until Christmas.

I know other people (like my late Dad) who would have found that stifling and prefer the spontaneity. I’m emotionally more like my dad as that’s how I was raised but over time I have come to appreciate that good planning makes life a lot smoother.

Life is definitely harder these days for the “let’s wing it,” people. I don’t know how I feel about this. It’s quite impractical for businesses to run on serendipity so I get it. But I also think this must make life even harder for people who struggle with this way of life. People on very low incomes or chaotic lives or neurodiverse people of various kinds for whom that sort of advance planning is nearly impossible.

Original poster
Teentrauma · 05/09/2023 08:21

cheezncrackers · 05/09/2023 07:42

I agree - no spontaneity and if it's outdoor and on the day the weather is shit it's both really disappointing and a total waste of money. It's also turned booking holidays with days out into a huge logistical PITA and means planning out each day in advance, rather than seeing what you feel like doing and being able to take into account things like tiredness or feeling unwell. If it's booked in advance you have to go or lose it.

Oh yes, the holiday planning! We recently went on a last minute holiday booked only a couple of weeks beforehand (shame on me!) and I spent a stressful evening trying to pre-book the days out we wanted to do. There was one in particular that I couldn't get for the day we wanted so had to change our plans to accommodate it. I'd been to this attraction many years before and distinctly remember simply rocking up on the day we fancied. This time it was scan your QR code on the gate on the way in - how times have changed!

OP posts:
TroysMammy · 05/09/2023 08:22

It also worries me that you will lose your money if ill on the day.

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 05/09/2023 08:22

I find the having to book a time slot very annoying. I prefer to have some flexibility to choose on the day what time we set off.

TiredMumOrMidlifeCrisis · 05/09/2023 08:23

Sooo agree with this! Would love to more spontaneous but it feels impossible these days…

MMMarmite · 05/09/2023 08:25

Thepeopleversuswork · 05/09/2023 08:19

One persons spontaneity is another’s chaos but I also understand having things planned could be another’s shackles.

So much this. A lot of this comes down to personality types. Your typical Type A person like my partner would have a meltdown at the concept of turning up to something on the off chance and trying to book. His entire calendar is blocked up until Christmas.

I know other people (like my late Dad) who would have found that stifling and prefer the spontaneity. I’m emotionally more like my dad as that’s how I was raised but over time I have come to appreciate that good planning makes life a lot smoother.

Life is definitely harder these days for the “let’s wing it,” people. I don’t know how I feel about this. It’s quite impractical for businesses to run on serendipity so I get it. But I also think this must make life even harder for people who struggle with this way of life. People on very low incomes or chaotic lives or neurodiverse people of various kinds for whom that sort of advance planning is nearly impossible.

Edited

This is insightful. I'd count myself as neurodiverse, planning isn't easy for me (executive function) but also my mental state is more variable than the average person, so it's hard to predict what I'll feel like on a future day. Spontaneity works way better for me.

MMMarmite · 05/09/2023 08:29

It's annoying on holiday too. If your activities are prescheduled, its a mission to fit them in, or else you are sitting around waiting for your timeslot. I want to have lunch in a café without feeling rushed, then wander to the museum in the sunshine, and join the queue at the time I arrive. Obviously depends how popular the museum is, but I'd prefer a short queue than spending the whole day on a schedule.

EveryKneeShallBow · 05/09/2023 08:30

I completely agree. And you have to keep monitoring websites for when bookings become available otherwise you miss out. I was waiting for a resort to release their Christmas packages and had to keep checking and checking, because I didn’t trust them to email me as they promised. Just as well, because they didn’t.

Original poster
Teentrauma · 05/09/2023 08:33

Glad it's not just me then! I'm also frustrated by how everything must be done on line, everything self service, apps to do simple things like park the car, QR codes etc etc. God knows how the elderly cope - I'm not THAT old and I definitely struggle. But that's a whole other thread........

OP posts:
Thepeopleversuswork · 05/09/2023 08:35

@MMMarmite

Interesting and of course there are many different flavours of neurodiversity and for every person who can’t bear to plan there’s someone who can’t cope if things aren’t planned.

I definitely think the “template” you inherit from your parents is very important in how you think about this.

My parents were “wingers”: loving and functional family but pretty disorganised. I’m pretty zen when things go wrong due to lack of forward planning: it’s annoying but shit happens and nobody died is my approach.

My partner however couldn’t cope with this. He would insist on as much pre planning as possible and would get really anxious at the prospect of turning up somewhere.

Twentytwo22 · 05/09/2023 08:37

I agree. I had to book a Christmas event recently because it sells out like mad! I even had to book a specific time but I don't know if I'll be doing anything else that day, what the weather will be like, I don't know what my baby's nap times and feeds will be in a few months! The company also said absolutely no refunds or time changes once booked. I hope it's worth it in the end!

Fluffycloudsfloatinginthesky · 05/09/2023 08:38

Fizbosshoes · 05/09/2023 07:28

Even the tip! 🤣

Booking for the tip is one of the best things to come out of covid.

I can turn up drop stuff and go. No waiting for 40 minutes because everyone looked at the webcams and though that's nice and quiet and turned up at the same time.

Mothew · 05/09/2023 08:43

Fizbosshoes · 05/09/2023 07:28

Even the tip! 🤣

Yes, we have to reserve 'tickets' via eventbrite for ours! At least it saves having to queue I suppose.

Namddf · 05/09/2023 08:44

Fizbosshoes · 05/09/2023 07:28

Even the tip! 🤣

Don’t get me started! 😡

TeenDivided · 05/09/2023 08:48

I like booking for the tip. It spreads out arrivals so you don't have randomly long queues. We can book ours on the day so you can decide to do a job, book the slot and get on with it.

pizzaHeart · 05/09/2023 08:50

I agree as well, I do understand the restrictions on numbers but absolutely hate the difference in prices e.g ticket 7 days in advance costs less. DD has additional needs so her health fluctuates, not very serious but enough to make planning of some things in advance impossible. It’s only some because she’s older now, would she be a primary age we wouldn’t be able to attend anything. And as many’ve noticed - once you are in you can’t change or cancel. So we just attend less.
And there is mental pressure of planning and the most important aspect - financial! We haven’t recovered from summer yet and thinking about Christmas is just too much..,,