To want DH to pull his weight

[littlelong1]

This may seem daft, but bear with me...I'm in the middle of my training which should lead to decent job offers. I do most chores at home, and like things reasonably neat, though with a toddler this is not easy. If I didn't we'd end up with a major backlog. My DH works, and is on a p/t course. He seems more interested in chilling out, playing PS2 & watching crap on TV than helping me out or spending as much free time as possible with our child.

Is it so hard to pull your weight so the house chores and child care is not left to one parent?

Don't get me wrong, DH does a lot for us when he wants to, but more often than not, he would rather pass the buck to me to spend time with DS...we are both busy with courses etc, and I don't see why I should put up with this...

jeez, I have just posted on the same topic in relationships!

bloody useless partners/ husbands, make me want to scream!!!!

I feel your pain

If you don't work and DH does, doesn't that change the balance in terms of who should do more housework?

get a cleaner?

Re: Quattrocento: I don't think it should...I'll tell you why.
My course as a whole easily takes up 6 days of the week. When I'm not doing work that's course related, I'm doing chores & child care. My time to kick back comes no eariler than 10PM, bed by 11 as have to get up by 7 for child.

Why should the balance swing against me when I do so very much more than DH? OK, he is the only bread winner, but without me getting through this course on a wing and a prayer, our future would be a deadend.

& we can't afford to bring in a third party when we are able - just not always willing....................

I'm with Quattrocento here, if your OH works and studies part time then the bulk of the housework should not fall to him.

Even a degree course doesnt take up 6 full days of study.

From the way the post is worded, maybe he feels unappreciated too? You state your future would be a deadend without your course but he's already working and studying too and that you do so much more than him.

Maybe i'm a bit old fashioned in my views but I wouldnt expect a working husband, who is also studying, to come home and start the housework. I appreciate you are doing a course but if you are home and dont have the added pressure of a job then you shouldnt resent having to do the lions share of the housework. I presume without your OH working you might not have been able to do the course in the first place.

If you both work, then 50/50 housework each but there has to be some give and take surely if you are home.

RE: HappyMummyOfOne: Sorry, my bad, I don't think I've told the situation too clearly.
My course involves two days on campus, but 1 unit every 2 weeks and a placement for which I have full responsibility. That adds up to a hell of a lot of work, esp as its level 5.

DH works, and we had aid towards costs - BUT he is on a p/t course which is spred over 6 years....
I know what a degree entails, but with the addition of DS with this training it's bloody hard work.

I know from the amount of time DH spends 'kicking back' he could easily spend time with child.

Go fingure. Maybe it is my bad wording.........