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AIBU?

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Original poster

What would you think to this? Is it Suspicious?

29 replies

Purpleeee · 04/09/2023 10:47

My DP is currently away on a holiday with a few mates and I went on Facebook just now and noticed he has a new Facebook friend, didn’t recognise the name so I thought I’d have a look. The woman lives in a different part of the UK, no where near us but she’s currently holidaying in the same hotel as him, going off her photos she has uploaded. Would you be suspicious of this?

OP posts:
OldEvilOwl · 04/09/2023 10:49

Ask him? he's not very clever if he is hiding something though is he?

Toastiesforever · 04/09/2023 10:50

Hmmmm, it would perk my senses for sure, but i would honestly try not to jump to conclusions just yet.

Ask him.

OhComeOnFFS · 04/09/2023 10:51

I would keep an eye on things, OP. I don't get it though when people go on separate holidays once they have a partner. It's different if it's a hobby trip, but if it's just a regular holiday then I'd be really uneasy about it, tbh.

ChilliNoodleGoodness · 04/09/2023 10:52

I mean, would he really add someone as a friend on FB if he was shagging her?

Caroparo52 · 04/09/2023 11:11

What a co-incidence...
Trust your gut op. My DEH left enough evidence to incriminate himself

Fireandflames666 · 04/09/2023 11:12

I'd see that as suspicious to be honest, trust your gut every time.

DemelzaandRoss · 04/09/2023 11:15

Do nothing ftb. As others have said, keep an eye on the situation. Watch & wait.

OhmygodDont · 04/09/2023 11:17

Who adds randoms from holidays these days like people you’ll never see again….

Id be watching.

Thisisme23 · 04/09/2023 11:17

I can't even imagine checking up on my partners friends list - to check if he had any new ones??
Was there something suspicious that made you check in the first place?
If he was doing anything inappropriate he'd be pretty daft accepting her as a new friend on social media. On the other hand he probably doesn't expect @Caroparo52 to be checking up on him?

GarlicGrace · 04/09/2023 11:17

There are people who want to add everyone they talk to for more than three minutes. I guess you'll want to see whether he keeps liking her stuff and vice-versa, and whether she 'randomly' shows up in his / his group's videos & photos.

Coastisclear · 04/09/2023 11:18

Yes. Why on earth does he need to add her? They are obviously getting to know one another. Might be befriending the whole group, or could just be your DP. Either way you are right to feel uncomfortable. I'd ask him but he'll probably just brush it off as being friendly.

TheEyesOfLucyJordon · 04/09/2023 11:18

It's all a bit "Deirdre Chambers ..... what a coincidence" 🙄

GarlicGrace · 04/09/2023 11:18

@Thisisme23, Facebook notifies you when friends make new friends unless you turn it off!

NeunundneunzigHorseBallonz · 04/09/2023 11:18

Don’t give him any hints that you are suspicious. Grab his phone and check everything when he’s back.

CaffeineAndCrochet · 04/09/2023 11:20

Suspicious of what? Yeah, he obviously met her on holiday but there's nothing to suggest it's anything more than friendly. He's hardly likely to add her if there was anything going on between them.

Thisisme23 · 04/09/2023 11:21

GarlicGrace · 04/09/2023 11:18

@Thisisme23, Facebook notifies you when friends make new friends unless you turn it off!

Really?? Well thats news to me. I must have it turned off as I've never had such a notification.
Well - more to the point then he'd be pretty daft accepting new friend if that's the case - he's not exactly being secretive is he?
Maybe this lady send friend requests to the whole group he is with? Maybe she's an old school/uni friend and its all very innocent?

Phos · 04/09/2023 11:37

I've added people I've met on holiday as fb friends. I've never shagged any of them.

Original poster
Purpleeee · 04/09/2023 12:12

This woman actually lives 5 hours away from where we live in the UK. It’s only him that she has friended on Facebook, not the others he is with and he has also followed her on instagram and liked some of her photos

OP posts:
Caroparo52 · 04/09/2023 13:37

Erm.. please read replies

carefully before responding. How could that even be possible?

Frazzledmummy123 · 04/09/2023 13:45

I can understand why you feel suspicious as the same hotel does sound strange. That said, I doubt he would add her as a friend on facebook if there was anytjing to be suspicious about.

I would sit tight just now and keep an eye on things for the moment. Asking him would only cause friction if he is innocent, or make him.cover his tracks if there is something.

Malapataraso · 04/09/2023 16:57

Try to imagine a situation where your husband is banging someone he just met at a hotel and they’ve decided between goes at each other to be FB and Instagram friends. That doesn’t happen. Does she have 17,000 FB friends, indicating she insists on friending everyone she meets? Check that out.

ASoapImpressionOfHisWifeWhichHeAte · 04/09/2023 16:58

ChilliNoodleGoodness · 04/09/2023 10:52

I mean, would he really add someone as a friend on FB if he was shagging her?

This!

Janieforever · 04/09/2023 16:58

Malapataraso · 04/09/2023 16:57

Try to imagine a situation where your husband is banging someone he just met at a hotel and they’ve decided between goes at each other to be FB and Instagram friends. That doesn’t happen. Does she have 17,000 FB friends, indicating she insists on friending everyone she meets? Check that out.

This,,

Janieforever · 04/09/2023 17:00

Is there a back story, I suspect you’re online stalking him. Not just happened to notice,,has he cheated before, or do you have trust/insecurity issues.

Pointynoseowner · 04/09/2023 17:02

No