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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should I be expecting more contact from DH?

9 replies

AaHu · 03/09/2023 21:04

Hi
So I have been married for 3 years, both my DH and I have 2 children from previous marriage and one together. DH is away for the first time in Malta since together with his 2 teenage sons which he so needed.
Maybe I am over thinking but DH has hardly checked in with me, once a day just asking how is baby or how the day has been. Nothing more than that. We are in a family chat were he and his sons are sharing pics throughout but no direct contact with me other than mentioned above.

AIBU for being annoyed at him and feeling like he doesnt care?

Everytime I go to message him hes online so I just take a step back and think if he wanted to he would have already so I dont.

I know I overthink. Is this one of those instances?

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 03/09/2023 21:06

Yes I think you probably are. He is with his sons and sharing pics indicat8ng all is ok

Oysterbabe · 03/09/2023 21:11

Yes you are overthinking. A check in once a day is fine.

Tandora · 03/09/2023 21:14

He’s checking in everyday, that sounds like plenty!

Original poster
AaHu · 03/09/2023 21:15

Omg thankyou for your quick responses. Sometimes I need another voice. Normally its my DH’s. But I cant ask him if im being unreasonable atm!

OP posts:
melj1213 · 03/09/2023 21:17

YABU - he's away on holiday with his teenage children, posting regular updates to your family chat and checking in with you personally once a day, what more do you want?

Cuppaand2biscuits · 03/09/2023 21:18

My dh goes away quite regularly with his friends to enjoy his hobby and I never expect to hear from him. I'll get the odd text, maybe one over the course of a weekend
I don't think I'd check in any more than once a day if it was me that was on holiday.

BatsHaveButtcheeks · 03/09/2023 21:18

Yes YABU.
What do you want him to do?

junebirthdaygirl · 03/09/2023 21:22

When you're the one away everything is hectic so you are less inclined to messaging. When your the one at home with a baby you're waiting for some adult contact so it seems an eternal wait. Message him. Send pictures of you little one. Don't play games waiting for him to message first. And keep busy. It's lovely he is having this break with his teens.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 03/09/2023 22:11

junebirthdaygirl · 03/09/2023 21:22

When you're the one away everything is hectic so you are less inclined to messaging. When your the one at home with a baby you're waiting for some adult contact so it seems an eternal wait. Message him. Send pictures of you little one. Don't play games waiting for him to message first. And keep busy. It's lovely he is having this break with his teens.

I agree with this. It's your husband not some guy you're dating!!

Also you can be honest and say 'I love getting little updates from you and the adventures you boys are having please keep them coming as much as you can!'

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