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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think if someone’ says This

23 replies

Toornit · 03/09/2023 17:41

They are basically denying the issue even though you know it’s true.person a talks about people behind their backs person b said this to person c and person c said person a has never said anything to me about you. Aibu to think just because someone hasn’t to you don’t dismiss people.

OP posts:
saveforthat · 03/09/2023 17:43

Sorry I've read that twice and still don't understand

Sirzy · 03/09/2023 17:44

So you want person c to lie?

HigatusFigatus · 03/09/2023 17:44

Sorry, I've read that over multiple times but still don't understand.

Sirzy · 03/09/2023 17:46

I think

Person A is accused of talking about people behind their backs

Person B talks about person A behind there back accusing them of talking behind peoples backs.

Person C says that she hasn’t experienced that.

i assume OP is person B and isn’t happy c hasn’t agreed with her

GodDammitCecil · 03/09/2023 17:47

It took me three gos, but I think I get it.

Your clearly person B.

What exactly do you want person C to do or say? Maybe they just don’t want to get into bad-mouthing someone else behind their back? Maybe they’re low-drama and just don’t want to get involved.

Really not sure what you want, OP.

GodDammitCecil · 03/09/2023 17:47

*You’re

NumberTheory · 03/09/2023 17:54

It makes sense for person C to be skeptical of gossip about person A that person C has not witnessed when the actions A is accused of are the sort that person C would expect to see.

It doesn’t mean person B is lying, but it becomes one person’s word against another’s with no independent evidence. If person C has some sort of duty towards person B then they should probably investigate rather than dismiss, but otherwise a noncommittal response seems best.

MichelleScarn · 03/09/2023 18:05

So Claire thinks Abi talks about people negatively? Becky says, I've not heard that and she's never said anything like this to me.
Claire wants Becky to accept her views?

BrightLightTonight · 03/09/2023 18:08

I have no idea what you are rambling about - so yes your “AIBU”

Hawkins0009 · 03/09/2023 18:08

Toornit · 03/09/2023 17:41

They are basically denying the issue even though you know it’s true.person a talks about people behind their backs person b said this to person c and person c said person a has never said anything to me about you. Aibu to think just because someone hasn’t to you don’t dismiss people.

pretty much, always best to presume that what ever you may discuss with person a, will always have potential to be discussed with other people.

ChocolateCakeOverspill · 03/09/2023 18:09

I get it. YABU.

Person C is telling the truth, why would you want them to lie?

jallopeno · 03/09/2023 18:12

Why is person B talking about person A behind their back and why doesn't B believe C? Maybe C and A chat about everything other than B.

Furryrug · 03/09/2023 18:13

Why do you think person C is lying?
Unless they just don't want to get involved in all the gossip.

Bethanbee · 03/09/2023 18:21

I don't understand. Who said what and which person are you?

ChocolateCakeOverspill · 03/09/2023 18:39

My take on this:

OP is person B

OP told person C that she thinks person A has been talking about her

Person C said ‘she’s never said anything to me’

OP thinks this was out of order because she feels person C is invalidating her and is annoyed with person C for saying what she said.

yellowsmileyface · 03/09/2023 18:39

Person b is also talking about person a behind their back so they're kind of a hypocrite.

Person c probably just doesn't want to get involved with drama. Fair enough I say.

Whatswhatwhichiswhich · 03/09/2023 18:42

Person A hasn’t talked about Person B behind their back to Person C and Person B has made themselves look a tit by trying to stir shit.

ArcaneWireless · 03/09/2023 18:44

I think I can safely say that the DM won’t bother running with this thread.

GeneJeanie · 03/09/2023 18:55

Please would people proofread their theres, theirs, yours and you’res? This thread is tricky enough!

ilovepixie · 03/09/2023 21:18

Are you all 6?????

ShowersOfShite · 03/09/2023 22:27

So you're person B?

You're having a bitch to friend C because you think friend A has been talking about you? And friend C has told you that the person A hasn't ever bitched about you to her. You have taken that to mean she's calling you a liar rather than that she's actually telling the truth and friend A has be been slagging you off. Why can't you be an adult and speak to person A directly instead of dragging someone else into what sounds like bitchy drama.

It's also possible friend C has more sense than to get drawn into childish shite and that friend A has been slagging you off but she tells you both she's never heard either of you slagging each other off behind their backs. Like a version of "I'm not taking sides", my father used to slag my mother off for decades after they split and then say I'm calling him a liar if I said she's never slagged him off (she never) that's what this kind of sounds like.

Alwaysdecorating · 03/09/2023 22:30

So C should agree with you, even though they actually disagree. It’s not C’s experience that A talks about B, behind their back. But you want them to agree it happens even if they have no evidence of it.

And the irony of B talking about A, behinds As back and getting annoyed C won’t join in, is quite funny.

cocoloco117 · 03/09/2023 22:34

Is the answer C gets on the train at 9.35? This is giving me flashbacks to the 11 plus.

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