To plan weekend which friends can’t attend ?

[Kay286]

We have a close knit circle of friends 4 couples
and we regularly socialise, dinner parties each others houses , concerts etc.
1 couple has no kids , 2 couples have younger kids , 1 couple has 17/18 year olds.
the young kids all come along to events and the kids all play well.
1 of the couples with younger kids is having family visit over Christmas and they have suggested they will take the kids away for a trip so the couple can have a few nights break.
The couple are pleased as rarely get child free time and have suggested we all do a couple of nights together in London.
we’ve started planning but the other couple with young kids just cannot get childcare … they are gutted so are we. What do we now can we still go without them or is that a bit shitty ?

You cant expect all 4 couples to always be available for every event. It would be really shitty for the couple with child free time if the other couple veto the trip. If someone did that to me, manipulated the friend group that way, I'd be reconsidering the friendship.

You all still go regardless. I’m the only one in my friendship with a baby (8 women) and they all do stuff I can’t always go to. They’ve got a couples holiday planned for next year, which we were invited to but can’t go on. That’s life, and I don’t control the group

Agree that all should still go but it's not a case of if a couple want a weekend away together without kids they just make it happen. Definitely not an option for some

Hmm I don’t agree. Sure childcare isn’t as accessible to some but it’s still available. We don’t have family support but I know if I really wanted to go somewhere I could ask friends. If you don’t have any friends there’s many many agencies that offer childcare overnight. Indeed some nursery staff do it on the side also. Whether or not you would want to do explore that option is another debate altogether but it’s definitely available to all.

@Cosycardigans yes csnt really get a babysitter for a long weekend - we will still plan something nice with them too over Xmas

@SummerInSun well no they have said still go… it does feel a little bit half hearted tho and I get they are disappointed. We do all feel a bit guilty now though

If it was just a night out id say go, but for a trip away that doesn't happen often I would try and find a date that everyone is able to do that would like to come.