Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Verbally abused by a child in store ..

50 replies

XStardustX · 30/08/2023 13:52

Hello, I would just like your thoughts on this. Am I the one being unreasonable thinking I am not in the wrong regarding this situation as its been playing on my mind.
During the weekend , I was out shopping in a well known store. I'd just finished a round of fertility treatment and decided to treat myself to some retail therapy in a nearby town to help relax me during the two week wait. I was having a really relaxing day until I went into one store.
I was standing In the middle of the Isle looking at the shelf, and I stepped forward to lift something of the shelf . All of a sudden a young boy , I would say maybe around 11-13 years old , I'm not good at estimating, he came flying along in a scooter. You know those scooters you put one foot on. I didn't see him at all. There was a corner so I don't know weather he came around the corner or straight up the Isle but he almost ran the scooter into me. I was a bit taken back when this happened as it took me by surprise. My opinion is that he shouldn't be using a scooter inside a store. Would you not agree? If he had of been on foot then he wouldn't have came so suddenly and quick. I just think they shouldn't be allowed in a store. What if he was to knock down a small child or something ?
I apologised and said sorry when I saw him almost running into me, how could I see someone coming so quickly on a scooter? All of a sudden he started screaming at me that I walked in his way. He was going insane violently roaring throwing F bombs over and over at me. Like he was going MENTAL, very aggressive. I've never heard a boy use such foul language. I don't feel that's a normal reaction at all. I didn't say anything to him, because I was taken back by what was suddenly happening and also he was a child. What bothered me more was the fact his dad just stood there and said nothing other than cmon. The way he behaved coming at me , I genuinely thought he was going to attack me physically before his dad interjected and said cmon. If that had been my child I would not have tolerated him thinking its acceptable to speak to another person like that and I would have made him to apologise. At the very least, I would apologise on his behalf for his behaviour and dealt with him later. His father clearly heard me say he shouldn't be flying around on a scooter inside the store . He was old enough to know sense and I feel its almost enabling this behaviour and teaching him this is OK to speak to people like that. staff overheard and said absolutely nothing while he rode off on his scooter again. If I had of been a staff member I would have asked him not to ride on the scooter while inside the store.
To be honest maybe I'm a little sensitive but this has genuinely been bothering me. I feel extremely uncomfortable going into any stores now and it's on my mind all the time and I had to send OH to do shopping last night as I couldn't face it.
I'd like to hear your thoughts.
If that was your child, would you have just ignored the situation or said something to the child or apologised on their behalf?

Do you think scooters should be allowed in stores ?
I know its none of my business how people educate and discipline their child but I just feel its not ok to teach a child its acceptable when it comes to endangering other people . What if he had of attacked me ? What if he knocked downed a young child as there were lots of very young children in the store .
I know some poeple will say those are what ifs and didn't happen , but those are also possible scenarios which could have / could happen in a future time .
Would like to hear other peoples thoughts

OP posts:

ToastyCrumpets · 30/08/2023 13:55

Scooters in busy pedestrian / shopping areas are an absolute menace.

Sadly, the type of parents who let their kids use them in places like this aren’t the kind who seem amenable to being told they’re a danger.

Conkersinautumn · 30/08/2023 13:59

His language sounds appalling and yes, staff and security generally ask children to leave scooters outside a store as it's not a play area, its about generally considering risk in a confined space.
But if he really was producing a barrage of foul language I'd imagine the staff were quite shocked too which can paralyse. No doubt the child will be very surprised when encounters a far.less calm reaction. I've seen an older man slap a child around the face once for the language he used. It wasn't justified but it does happen.

RobertaFirmino · 30/08/2023 13:59

Someone is bound to say that he may be neurodiverse.

That does not matter one jot. The parent should never have allowed this in the first place. If he melts down because he's not allowed to ride it in a shop then it shouldn't be taken out in the first place.

I can understand why this has affected you so much. There's a chance you might be pregnant, of course your preservation instincts are going nuts!

I hate these scooters, I'm not exactly nimble and sometimes use a stick. I've almost been knocked over quite a few times.

BlueChampagne · 30/08/2023 14:00

Agree they are a menace. Suspect he was out on his own without parents. Staff should have stepped in. Complain to manager?

mn29 · 30/08/2023 14:00

YANBU. He shouldn't have been riding a scooter in a shop, especially at speed. The dad should have intervened and made it clear it's unacceptable to talk to people that way, even if you do believe you're the one in the right.

5128gap · 30/08/2023 14:03

Its horrible behaviour. He shouldn't have been riding the scooter and his behaviour was abusive. His parent was very wrong in not addressing it and apologising to you.
I think this sort of thing is upsetting because it's a bit if a 'what's the world coming to' moment, and you can't help but wonder if this is how pre teen boys behave without correction, what they will be like as adult men.
Fortunately OP, I'd say your experience was rare.

VeridicalVagabond · 30/08/2023 14:04

Sadly this sort of bollocks is all too common. Friend of mine works in retail and she's had kids 11-14 swear, spit, scream, throw things at her etc. Parents do fuck all about it. Shits raised by shits.

Sorry it's shaken you up OP. Try and let it go, it's not personal, they're just twats.

Notimeforaname · 30/08/2023 14:06

Avoiding going to the shops or not being able to "face it" after a little bollox on a scooter had a shit fit, is OTT. We encounter all sorts of people in life. Go to the shops.

ButterCrackers · 30/08/2023 14:09

What a rubbish parent to let their child be on a scooter in a shop. What a rubbish parent to have their child verbally abuse someone and also no apology. It’s a disgrace. Unfortunately many parents let their kids grow up with no politeness to others. If it was my shop I’d have banned them. Take care of you. Put this aside and rest up.

Aquamarine1029 · 30/08/2023 14:10

It was alarming, dreadful behaviour, but you really need to let it go and get over it.

NotMadeOfStone · 30/08/2023 14:11

Well it's not a pleasant incident but to let it make you nervous of going into other shops is a bit silly.

Just forget it and move on. Any kid who acts that way is pretty likely to have a more shitty home life than you.

wotanarse · 30/08/2023 14:11

Staff should have stopped him at the door and told him 'you're not bringing that in here, sunshine'.

Comedycook · 30/08/2023 14:12

No way would I ever allow one of my dc to use a scooter in a shop. As for the abuse he hurled at you, sounds like he's being dragged up rather than brought up.

BackToOklahoma · 30/08/2023 14:13

If it’s bothering you, contact the store. Tell them what happened and ask whether they allow scooters. Tell them that their staff watched on and said nothing.

In terms of not being able to, presumable this hasn’t happened often to you and so odds are, it’s unlikely to happen often.

A child threw a stone at me once and their parent just stood there and said nothing. Shit parents are everywhere. Another woman on a mobility scooter bumped into my then toddler, looked at him like shit and told him to move. No sorry or please. He was literally holding my hand looking at toys in Tesco and it was her fault. Some people are just rude. Speak up for yourself if you feel able at the time but don’t let them bother you. There’s lots of lovely people out there.

BackToOklahoma · 30/08/2023 14:14

That should say

In terms of not being able to go to other stores

Spookymormonhelldream · 30/08/2023 14:14

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Fundays12 · 30/08/2023 14:15

RobertaFirmino · 30/08/2023 13:59

Someone is bound to say that he may be neurodiverse.

I can understand why this has affected you so much. There's a chance you might be pregnant, of course your preservation instincts are going nuts!

I hate these scooters, I'm not exactly nimble and sometimes use a stick. I've almost been knocked over quite a few times.

As a mum of a nuerodiverse child I agree. I find it quite insulting and discriminatory for people to assume bad behaviour equals nuerodiversity. None of my children including my nuerodiverse child would be allowed to behave like that. This child behaved like that because they were allowed. His father should have dealt with him immediately and not allowed him to scoot into people.

RobertaFirmino · 30/08/2023 14:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Who the fuck are you, Beverley Knight?

Jantlet · 30/08/2023 14:18

I would definitely let the store manager or head office know what happened. There are unfortunately too many of these types around these days - shits bred by shits, the kids don’t stand a chance of ever becoming decent human beings.

Try to forget about it, it’ll be happening to loads of other people every day, and you are no doubt feeling a little vulnerable now.

Best of luck with your treatment.

BoohooWoohoo · 30/08/2023 14:19

Yanbu to think that scooters and Heelys shouldn't be allowed in shops. He's definitely old enough to wait for his dad outside.
Unfortunately behaviour in children is at an all time low and innocent people like teachers rather than the parents bear the brunt of this.
Yabu to let this stop you going into shops when you've done nothing wrong.

HauntedPencil · 30/08/2023 14:20

This is just one of those horrible circumstances where you come across some badly behaved people. Yes you are right shouldn't have been there in the first place, should never have been so rude to you, and the father should have intervened far more and apologised to you.

I've never seen a kid that age tearing up in a shop on a scooter so hopefully incidents are few and far between

LakeTiticaca · 30/08/2023 14:41

Brats like that need a bloody good crack but it's not acceptable to do that anymore and it shows

girlfriend44 · 30/08/2023 14:46

This post just highlights how society has gone downhill badly.

TicTac80 · 30/08/2023 14:52

My thoughts? I wouldn't have allowed my DC to be in a store or indoors with a scooter (or Heelies for that matter). I wouldn't forgive myself if they caused injury to someone else by running into them at speed. I always made them walk with their scooters if we were passing pedestrians on a path.

If either of my DC were verbally abusive like that? I'd have intervened immediately, be furious at their behaviour, mortified and hugely apologetic. They'd be severely disciplined. I don't allow shouting or swearing at home (or anywhere), and they've been taught decent manners and behaviour and to be respectful towards others. I've also told their teachers that I would always want to know if they've not been behaving decently at school.

The father (or whoever the adult was accompanying the child) should have intervened straight away and apologised to you. Don't let this stop you going out.

Devilsmommy · 30/08/2023 15:01

I understand your anxiety especially as you may be pregnant. When I was 8.5 months pregnant 1 of these idiots on electric scooter came bombing round a corner nearly bashing into my very big belly. It shook me up no end. However don't let it keep you from going out to shops. Next time if it happened again and the parent was there I'd be giving the mom/dad a piece of my mind

Flip

1 2