Good morning all,
Posting here for traffic, I admit! It is my first post, but longtime lurker
Sister is 2 year older than me, and she has done everything to knock my self esteem and turn other people against me and its really taking its toll on me now we are approaching middle age
As kids, at home, I would get beat up daily by her, stealing my stuff - she made my life an absolute misery and at school she would spread rumors etc. There was no escape from her - but that is all history, but this behavior's continued after we left home
So, as adults - we had been in sporadic contact, and I hadn't been in contact with my sister for about two years, and last year we got back in contact and I thought she had changed - and she acted nice for a while - when it was just me and her - however her behavior's changes entirely when my Husband is in the room
Over the past few months, it has become obvious that she hasn't changed - not one bit. She is still, after all these years, very verbally and physically aggressive
She will come round my house unannounced and make very disparaging comments to my husband about me (whilst I am in the room) - 'what did you marry THAT for' - 'how do you put up with HER?'
....and I am not assertive (I am the opposite to her) and these comments always flabbergast me, and I do not know what to say.
I cannot have a reasonable conversation with her, as she will just get aggressive, or do the typical gaslight thing like 'oh it was only a joke...stop being moody'
How do I handle this? Like I say I am not assertive, and anything I do say is highly likely to result in her hurling threats and abuse.
She literally lives two minutes walk from me