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AIBU?

AIBU to wish that other children's mums would not dish out chocolate to my DD at school?

188 replies

BlueCornflower · 01/03/2008 16:00

My 4 year old came home from school with a creme egg yesterday as one of the mums of the class wanted to give all the children a 'pre-Easter' present. (It was February!). I know it was a kind gesture but I do feel annoyed that someone else can give my child something which I wouldn't acually have given her myself unless it was a very special treat. I could hardly tell her she couldn't have it. I'm not REALLY annoyed by it and wouldn't have minded if it was this child's birthday but I just wish other parents wouldn't do this. AIBU?

OP posts:

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MadamePlatypus · 02/03/2008 15:34

oops, and he had a fruitshoot to.

seeker · 02/03/2008 15:36

An 8 year old at risk ofchoking on a boiled sweet? You know I'm amazed most children make it to adulthood - the dangerous lives they live!

castille · 02/03/2008 15:37

There are lots of biscuits, cakes and other high fat, low nutrition snacks aimed directly at the after-school market here (I'm in France too), but not all parents fall for the marketing.

My girls are 10 and 8 and still have goûter, BTW Anna. Lunch is at 12 and they are ravenous by 4.30.

Anna8888 · 02/03/2008 15:40

And do they also eat dinner with you?

We had to put an absolute ban on gouter a while back because my stepsons were not eating properly in the evening... and then not eating breakfast etc. The school info in Paris advises parents to give children breakfast, lunch and dinner only, with no snacks.

MadamePlatypus · 02/03/2008 15:43

I am sure that I read somewhere that gouter could be a slab of chocolate in a baguette. Also, isn't a traditional French breakfast a large cup of melted chocolate and milk with some baguette? No idea whether anybody actually does this. Just thinking about chocolate really.

Anna8888 · 02/03/2008 15:45

Most children I know eat either cereal and milk or baguette/butter tartines for breakfast (and my partner always quizzes the children who come for sleepovers at our house about their breakfast habits as he likes to gather ammo for convincing the boys to eat every morning ).

Croissants and pains au chocolat are treats for the weekend.

Anna8888 · 02/03/2008 15:46

Lots of children do drink hot chocolate for breakfast in France - you are right. And there are loads of chocolate-flavoured breakfast cereals.

Fillyjonk · 02/03/2008 15:51

yes but this isn't chocolate is it?

creme eggs are vile

carmenelectra · 02/03/2008 16:04

Im sorry Anna, but i disagree. Im not suggesting that schools let kids bring anything they like in, but i dont think its their duty to police what kids have either.

it makes me laugh when schools ban certain things, like if kids eat shit at home they are suddenly going to eat healthily cos the school doesnt allow it. Its the parents job.

My ds's school now only allows fruit or dried fruit for 'tuck' when previously you could also have toast, crumpets, cereal bars etc. I didnt mind my ds having a cereal bar or a slice of toast mid morning, especially as he has two big breakfasts at home.

Its the parents job to make sure that kids have ahealthy attitude to food so they dont want to gorge on rubbish. Banning food is plain odd i think.

I gave my ds1 a variety of food as a baby, bascially everything we ate. Nothing banned though and surprise ,surprise he eats very well now and likes most things and also eats treats which is just fine by me.

hatrick · 02/03/2008 16:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

AbbeyA · 02/03/2008 16:38

Parents can't offload all their responsibilities onto schools! If a child brings a small birthday treat in for the class it is nothing to do with the school (it would be if they ate them at school but they are given them at hometime). Party invitations are nothing to do with the school-it would have to follow that you didn't hand those out through the school.
A healthy diet can include the odd treat.I am not fat,I eat a healthy diet, I go running and I eat chocolate (occasionally in small amounts)and I have no intention of giving it up.Children are obese in this country because they eat junk food, fizzy drinks etc on a daily basis and don't get enough exercise. They don't get obese on an occasional creme egg.They have a healthier attitude in France to eating in that a meal is an event and they sit down properly as a family. If the French didn't eat sweet things they wouldn't have all the wonderful chocolate shops and patisseries, where cakes are wrapped up as an art form.

princessosyth · 02/03/2008 16:47

Why on earth would you want to hand out easter eggs to other peoples children in February! She either thinks she is willy wonka or she works in Marketing for Cadbury's . She is obviously deranged!

castille · 02/03/2008 17:05

Anna - yes they do, at about 7/7.30. But I have to police goûter because they are so hungry they'd eat heaps if I let them. I now take my choice to school for them to eat on the way home so they don't raid the cupboards. They are both stringbeans so filling but healthy is what's required.

MadamePlatypus - Two squares of good chocolate (not a whole bar!) inside baguette is ok in my book, occasionally.

Thankfully creme eggs don't exist here

MadamePlatypus · 02/03/2008 18:41

princessosyth, you have hit the nail on the head.

BlueCornflower · 02/03/2008 21:18

Just looking in again - didn't realise this would turn into such a debate!
Anna - er, thanks for your original suggestion about writing to the head but I don't think I'll do that. I do think, though, that it might be a good idea for schools to suggest that parents did not send in food to be given out. If it is a birthday (which it wasn't on Friday), I don't see why the child can't just give out sweets / chocolate to those children they invite to their party.
Princess - Like it!
Hatrick - YES easily! But I think creme eggs are miles smaller than they used to be (isn't everything?)

OP posts:

deste · 02/03/2008 21:32

Why dont you have one day at the weekend when your children can have sweets. They then put anything they are given away for the weekend. Simple.

seeker · 02/03/2008 21:51

My PFB couldn't have eaten a whole creme egg at 4. She would have brought it to me and said"Oh dear, mummy, it's sweeties and we only have sweeties on Saturday don't we? Shall I put it away in the cupboard?" My NSB could have eaten 6, hidden the wrappings and blamed any chocolate smears on the furniture on his big sister at 3!

Elasticwoman · 03/03/2008 10:00

OP - I agree with you. I remember being v sick after a creme egg when I was 12.

It is hard to resist this sort of thing, esp if teachers do it too, though these days they are more likely to give out stickers than edible rewards.

You would not be unreasonable - though you would be brave - to tell the teacher, whose co-operation is probably needed in the distribution, and ask if this practice could stop. Also if it happens again, you could return the sweets to the parent concerned.

I knew a mother who would not let her dc have sweets at all till age 10. By the time she told me this, her eldest was 28 and still had perfect teeth. But the mother could not keep up the prohibition with her younger children, once the older ones had sweets.

Cappuccino · 03/03/2008 11:32

had to come back to this thread after my two (3 and 7) had creme eggs in a cafe on Sunday

it was my mother's day treat and creme eggs were much cheaper than the organic homemade cakes, which were too big for them to have one each and they were too stroppy to pick the same one to share

DualCycloneCod · 03/03/2008 11:33

im with cappy
idontc are

you need to get a life

shatteredmumsrus · 03/03/2008 11:39

I wouldnt care either, its only an chocolate egg. I would care if my child was allergic to it though and i would be annoyed if they had chocolate and i didnt, sorry

wannaBe · 03/03/2008 11:44

nope couldn't be bothered about that im afraid. in fact...

I made chocolate chip cookies for my ds' class and they had them at snack time. Parents would have been none the wiser until the cookies had been well and truely eaten and digested. do I care? Not a bit. It's a cookie/piece of chocolate fgs - far greater things in life to get upset about.

Oh and, I checked with teacher first re alergies and made meringues for the child who was not allowed glutin so no child was put at risk.

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bookwormmum · 03/03/2008 11:51

it's a nice idea but it's far too early for Easter Eggs - my dd is banned from eating chocolate Sunday-Thursday btw. if she gets it in school then she is allowed it.

mind if everyone in the class had the same idea, then there'd be 30 creme eggs coming home .

[feeling sick]

SmartArse · 03/03/2008 11:55

I wish someone would give my DCs chocolate at school. It would save me feeding them.

I once had a little girl of about 5 over to play with DD2. They'd been out in the garden for about an hour before she came in complaining that her foot hurt. I took off her shoe to have a look, and found a melted, squashed, Creme Egg in the toe. Most odd.

snorris · 03/03/2008 12:49

I get annoyed too. It means I also have to shell out on sweets for the class.

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