Hi MN,
I am Needing help ASAP.
Me and ex have a 2 year old. I fell pregnant 4 months into our relationship, he already had a child. He was hot and cold towards me and I was like a puppy dog to it. When baby came along, he wanted to be a family. Soon the cracks started and we argued horrendously. He was a good Dad to both his kids but a shitty partner. Things came to an end this July when I decided to co parent. He agreed, he picks her up on a Saturday , brings her back and doesn’t bother me the rest of the week.
However, one weekend he must have been drinking because he turned up at my house and attacked me. Not bad enough to hurt me but I was scared and screamed and neighbours called the police. This happened 3 weeks ago and they are trying to find him to arrest him. I did not give a statement as I wanted to move on from the incident. They told me they will press charges regardless.
Long story short - A charity got in touch and suggested I do a restraining order, preventing him from coming to my home. I went ahead and I now need to sign it. I am just feeling incredibly guilty. Will they stop him seeing our child? Will I need to go through a contact centre?
Social services have done a family assessment and are happy to close it now. I haven’t given Ex any contact with our child since incident, I wanted to wait for things to calm down. My close friend who is incredibly neutral has been passing messages onto him from me and he has very much stayed away, no harassing or threats. SS suggested I can either meet in a public location to drop off / pick up or go through a Third person.
I am very pro contact and I don’t want to go through the contact centre or third person route. How should I go about contact? Or will this be decided for me?