OCD/intrusive thoughts during pregnancy

[babyk2023]

Hi,

Currently 23 weeks pregnant and really struggling with my MH. I keep having intrusive thoughts in regards to the baby's paternity. There is no way I've cheated but my mind keeps creating stories and false scenarios.

Anyone else have the same issue? How did you overcome it?

Bless you, OCD is awful. The NOCD app, Ali Greymond on Youtube and especially her app are all so helpful. It is really hard when you're in it. I promise it does go. The best and hardest thing you can do is totally ignore each thought. It's a false alarm essentially flagging up whatever it is that disturbs you most and the thoughts stick all the time you try to rationalise with them, engage with them or prove them wrong. Imagine OCD as a bit bully that will always win unless you simply don't care.

@CornishBarbie Thank you for the helpful response 💕. I try to rationalise these thoughts and counteract them but it's like my brain plays tricks and tries to find holes within the rational thoughts with 'what if ...' if that makes sense?

It's really draining and is constant 😢 x

Progesterone rises in pregnancy and if you're particularly sensitive to it, it can cause issues, have a read about it.
Progesterone sensitivity is responsible for PMT and PMDD in non pregnant women. I took it as part of my HRT and it was hideous.
Hope you feel better soon, especially knowing it's your hormones and being able to rationalise it a little bit.

Don't try and counteract them. That just gives them credibility. Ignore them. Do something to distract yourself. If you ignore them, over time you'll notice them less and less.

Honestly been there! You're so welcome. It's weird at one point I was so consumed by it that I felt like my reality was hell, now I look back and laugh at them. You will get there I promise. The problem is, your brain and its thoughts are like a constant stream at the moment. When your hormones and the equilibrium is right, your brain filters out the intrusive thoughts like two dams built into the stream. OCD is like the dam is broken and everything is flooding through. Everytime you ignore a repulsive thought you rebuild the dam. Ignoring is easier said than done when you're convinced you've done something wrong but remember, your brain is flagging those up because deep down in your psyche they represent the worst possible thing you can imagine. Imagination is a funny thing, we aren't in control of it as we think we are. Just as a quick witted person can come back with an incredible joke in seconds, an KCD sufferer is using the same part of their overactive brain to come up with the most intricate fears and scenarios, urges, feelings, questions, statements, false memories etc in the same speed. Your subconscious doesn't know the different between imagination and reality hence the response you feel to these thoughts BUT the good thing about that is it is in the present moment too. You are in control by ignoring it or even entertaining it. It's so so hard when you're surrounded by triggers though. One really interesting cause is that the imbalance of pregnancy hormones can mean we feel guilt and shame as a result of imbalances in our bodies. This in turn causes the subconscious mind to search for a problem when there isn't one in an effort to keep us safe and it'll latch on to what we care about at the time, coming up with what ifs. See if your gp can talk to you about balancing your hormones, it can play a big part in the way it feels when you have these thoughts. Also if you can, i found working full time when I had OCD was exhausting but really good for me. I think it was because my mind was occupied for so long each day with real challenges and real time issues it had no room for rumination. Ah sorry and lastly, a lady called Allegra on tik tok is an OCD therapist after recovering from it herself. I love her videos. Be careful not to fall down the rabbit hole I did though where you become obsessed with OCD itself. Best of luck to you, if you ever need anything my inbox is always open. My mum had OCD when she had me and I had the most amazing childhood and now we are best friends so it truly doesn't last forever honestly x

@babyk2023 this is far more common than you would know. Intrusive thoughts attack what's most important to us. If you put intrusive paternity fears into the mumsnet search bar other posts just like yours pop up. Also Diana Wilson at maternal OCD is amazing. X

@babyk2023 Just came across this post again and was wondering how you were doing?

@Ilovedogs1 hello. Thanks for checking in I was the OP on this post. I've had a name change since then.

Still the same I still battle these thoughts every single day

@user666555 sorry to hear that. How old is your baby now?
Did you suffer with anxiety/OCD before pregnancy?

@Ilovedogs1 yes I have always suffered with anxiety. I always fixate on a thought and go around in circles with it. It got worse during pregnancy/post baby.

My LO is 5 months old now