In telling the parents each time their kid runs in front of the car

[Element4056]

We live in a cul de sac of 6 homes. To drive into the cul de sac there is a blind spot, hard to see when turning in and it is only a road which we can then turn into our respective homes. Just to make clear there is no pavement either side of this road, it is simply a road to turn into the cul de sac and then drive onto our driveways.

For the last month, the house just outside of our cul de sac (their back garden fence is situated adjacent to the road of the cul de sac) the parents have started opening their fence gate which leads to their back garden and letting their kids run out to play on the road. The kids are around 4years, 6 years and 8 years. They are left to play on the road without any adults around.

My husband, when turning and driving into the cul de sac, has had to break as the 4 year old was just sat in the middle of the road. Once the kid had moved away to a neighbours driveway, my husband started driving again only for the same child to then suddenly randomly run in front of the moving car! Husband then breaks again really hard. When we start moving again, the child then once again runs in front of our moving car.

I was very angry and went and told the parents off. That their young child not once but twice ran in front of a moving car and could very easily have been hurt. A road is not a play area for a child. This isn't a pavement. It isn't a park. They cannot play outside on the road. This was a week ago.

Today whilst driving into the cul de sac the 4 year old once again ran into the road in front of the car. I was very angry and made my husband go and tell his parents. My husband was reluctant saying he doesn't want to get involved. I said we are already involved when we seem to have this young child running in front of the car and next time he can actually get hit. Plenty of times drivers have come speeding when taking the turn and can easily hit him.

My DH thinks I'm unreasonable and that we shouldn't get involved. I think next time we should report the parents to social services for leaving their kids unattended and playing on the roads!

Loudly beep the horn every time. That way everyone will know they have left their child at risk again. It might give the child enough of a jolt to stay out of the road too.

Why didn’t you go and tell the parents this time? It happened to you, not your DH. It maybe will make them take more notice if two people have complained. I think it’s worth telling social services too.

I would say something. I think you need to really.

I'm neither a parent nor a driver but this sounds bonkers to me. Do the parents not like their own kids or something? I'd be contacting social services. And I can't imagine how utterly dreadful a driver is going to feel if god forbid a child gets hurt... or worse.

2 people have complained, OP first time, her husband second time

I thought go and play in the traffic was just a sick joke. Why would they do this??

YANBU at all to tell. them, but you are totally wasting your time.

Any parents who let their 4, 6 and 8 year old out unsupervised couldnt give a damn what you say.

I would ring 101 for advice.

@Neverseenbefore sorry if it wasn't made clear, both times it has happened my husband was the driver. I was actually at home the first time. And the second time I was in the car with him. This time I made him go speak to the parents.

What do the parents say?

I agree I think we are wasting our times in speaking to parents who let their young children, including a 4 year old out unsupervised to play on the road no less. This is why I've said to my husband, when it happens again, and it will, I'm reporting them to SS. He thinks I'm being unreasonable getting involved.

@cansu the mother just nods her head along. Says it won't happen again. Then starts screaming at the 4 year old until he's crying and shaking uncontrollably.

Oh, yes, you’re right. I misread!

I'd be reporting them now.
'When it happens again' might have catastrophic results

I honestly don't think SS will do anything. They shouldn't let their young children out on their own but are they not feeding them? Hitting them? Do they look neglected?
SS is overrun with reports and I doubt the parents will even get visited and even if they do presumably the children will be back in school so hopefully not in the road.
I mean you can complain and if enough people do it might make a difference but it won't solve the problem immediately.

Instead of calling SS, I would call the police on the non-emergency number and ask them to visit the family and talk about this. It is a fatality waiting to happen and, regardless of whose fault it was, I don’t think I could live with the knowledge that I killed a 4 yr old.

I understand why you are annoyed, its a safeguarding issue but because it has continued, it may be deliberate, almost like the kid could be testing you and your husband.

You could threaten the parents by getting the authorities involved, such as SS. But take pics and log it as they may ask for more details such as the frequency and severity of the incidents. You could also give the CAB a call.

Its crazy to be honest with you, a lack of discipline, road sense, common sense and intelligence. At the very least those kids should be banned from the road by their parents.

Beep horn
Tell them every time - write it down
Report to council so they can see if traffic markings need improving
Get a dash cam.
I guess report to social services.
This should make sure you're covered if you kill someone.

Apart from that there's not much you can do

I'd write to them. And keep copies.

If it continues then you need to escalate to SS.

Get a dashcam

Bit of a drip-feed.

Report to ss.

Yes, this is sensible.

Your h is being shockingly relaxed about the potential of hurting a 4 year old child. Where I live 8 year olds can "play out" but 4 is insanely young. The mother might want a break as it's the summer holidays but allowing this to happen is madness.

It might be worth ringing non emergency police number. They might take more notice then. Surely they just need to lock the gate!!

Id report to social services and the police non-emergency number, especially as its happened multiple tomes. Sounds like a tragedy waiting to happen!

I’ve had a child run out in front of my car and I didn’t have time to stop - while I don’t feel guilty as there’s nothing I could have done to prevent it, I feel bad for the child having being failed by their parents in terms of road sense and supervision.

Speak to the police and SS; don’t let it happen to another child - it was an awful experience for everyone involved.