My F25 friend is very selfish and contrary. Her parents decided to start fostering children over two years ago. They took in a young traveller girl (F7) who they will have till she’s 18 but will go on to adopt. My friend hasn’t lived at home in over several years and her younger biological sibling moved in to what was her bedroom while the girl they foster moved into her younger siblings room, meaning my friend no longer has a bedroom in the family home. She had a meltdown about this and made up a million scenarios i.e. if her and her boyfriend broke up, she would have nowhere to go “home” to. A COMPLETE OVERREACTION! Her parents have built a separate extension onto their house that they have offered to my friend and her boyfriend multiple times should they need anywhere to stay. My friend is also very financially well off and could afford a mortgage tomorrow if she really wanted.
My friend loves to say how much of an unmannered brat the child is and how her stories are wild, but I’ve met the child and she’s honestly lovely! She has a big character but is by no means is the spoilt brat my friend makes her out to be. My friends biological dad wasn’t in her life and still isn’t in her life 100% (he used to contact her through Linkedin only and now Whatsapp), but her step dad has always been known as dad and been there since basically Day 1, so I understand there is some childhood trauma behind her emotions.
She told the link worker that her mum no longer has time for her and she has resentment towards the fostered child as a result, and makes it very difficult for the link worker to mediate with them as a family together. She tries to say her mum has no time and has the fostered child in a lot of activities while she didn’t receive the same attention or treatment as a child. Back then, her parents weren’t exactly wealthy whereas now they have excess income and receive an allowance for the child. This isn’t to say my friend was neglected because her parents put her through driving lessons, paid for her insurance, and first FEW cars!
They recently announced they were going on a family holiday (all kids U18) and my friend has just returned from Ibiza with her boyfriend. She has decided to throw a tantrum that she wasn’t invited on this holiday or the middle sister (21F) and is waffling on about how unfair it is and selfish of her parents.
My friend just sent me a video of her crying. CRYING! Because her parents have decided to foster a 6 week old baby for 3-6 months without “consulting” my friend and she is not having any of it.
AIBU for telling my friend to grow up, seek therapy, and that these kids need her parents more than she does?
I have seen the messages she sent to her mum/link worker and think they’re honestly disgusting for someone 25, I really struggle to be there or have sympathy for her because her parents are doing a good thing.