Arachnophobia

[Chickentikka567]

I know most people are not keen on spiders. It sounds dramatic but they just make my life a misery, it's a constant anxiety. I have occasional nightmares about them, I've had several bad experiences like finding one on my pillow, finding 2 large ones in the bath at the same time, and so on.
I dread this time of year and they seem to have started early due to the poor weather.
Have been lucky to not have many in our flat, but I can't escape them completely. It puts me off going to hot countries, I feel miserable about living in a world with them. I know that sounds dramatic and there are much worse things out there that would harm or kill me.
it's just frustrating but it's part of life I suppose. There was a therapy course but it was too expensive, something like £100 per session!
has anybody managed to successfully get rid of this phobia.

I think you should consider spending a bit on good therapy, if its impacting your life so much. Its expensive yes, but just imagine how much easier life would be without the constant fear.
DH is terrified of spiders. But hes not willing to do anything about it 🤷🏻‍♀️

Yes, I cried and ran away from spiders in the past. I started watching videos about them, reading about them, learning about the role they play in the eco system, etc. Then I bought a tarantula. Now I have over 20 tarantulas and look forward to spider season!

I know a lot of people don't like spiders, but is it really most? Most of the people in my social circle are either indifferent or positively like them.

I can't pick up a live one, no. Also, why does it matter what I do with them?

I'm terrified of all types & sizes. DCat however is an absolute lover of them so we rarely see them.

Also put conkers in the corners of your rooms, seems to help

If you are serious about getting rid of a debilitating phobia why wouldn't you spend £100 per session? Think how much we pay electricians, plumbers etc.

I had EMDR for my spider phobia and felt better after just one session, that may not be the case for you but I recommend it.

Shocked by the number of people on here who kill spiders. They are very useful for our ecosystem so please bloody well stop.

Just put a conker on the floor in the corners of your rooms or in the corners of windowsills - job done.

I have my house fully fumigated every few years with those smoke bomb things, it kills all of the hidden eggs and creepy crawlies you can't see and I have cats.
I've only seen one spider this year which came in through an open window.
The kitten kills every insect that walks or flies into the house.

Stop killing spiders!!!! Aaaargh!! We don't live in fecking Australia - they will do you no harm. Save up and get some therapy!

Another arachnophobe here. I was actually thinking of starting a thread myself! I (almost) forgot I have arachnophobia as for the past 8 years I lived on the 8 floor of a well insulated apartment in central London, so spiders were super rare (a small one per year, or so). Well, we've now moved to an unrenovated Victorian house........... I'm absolutely terrified.

A (not-so funny) story... I was watching the wedding video for the first time when I noticed a shot of my parents talking to each other in a very serious manner during the ceremony. I asked why they looked miserable and that's when they disclosed that there was a medium sized spider crawling up at the back of my dress - they were discussing how to remove it without me noticing. My lovely and practical MOH fixed my dress and removed it without me noticing. Everyone at the wedding knew about the spider and they all kept quiet to avoid affecting my mood! (Mum put the spider in a tissue in her clutch bag... when she opened it to grab her reading glasses at the top table it was still alive and crawling outside of her clutch) 😆

Please dont kill them or use all the poisons. Theyre decent and useful creatures.

I was never a particular fan of them, im still not, but I get the spider catcher job so it's a case of buckle up and get over it. I appreciate this isnt a possibility for true phobias, but I dont have one so can tell myself that.

Naming them and giving them back stories helps me as im wrestling with a jug and a bit of paper to move them.

Oh you poor thing, OP. I get it. I am the same. Nightmares about them all year and the dreaded countdown to August/Sept when the worst of it starts. I am loving the very helpful PP who says it is the physical response to the fear, the sudden adrenalin and panic. The spider itself doesn't actually harm. I like that. I am going to try to understand that when I am next faced with one.
Meantime, my life learnings so far....
The home you live in really makes a difference. I lived in a concrete block of flats in a city centre when I was younger and saw one in 8 years. I live in a house with a garden in the countryside now and am plagued by them. Wolf spiders. The spindly ones do not give me the same fear but they do not stop the wolf spiders either unfortunately.
At this time of year I have a couple of plastic spiders that we leave out and my kids play with to help with a little desensitization as I see them lying around in different places.
I have spider spray next to my bed and in most rooms. I have bought a big 5l spider spray to use in a spray gun and I go round the windows and doors after any heavy rain has passed (otherwise it is supposed to last for a few weeks).
I have a spider catcher to hand (google this if you don't have one) and if the spider is on a straight surface rather than in a corner or on a curtain, I can catch it if I have to if dh is not there. Otherwise I will have to spray it, then catch it when it moves, then take it outside, then (as it has been sprayed) stamp on it.

I didn't know you could fumigate for spiders or even pay someone to get rid of them - I will have to look into this!

DP will put them outside, but if I'm on my own, I even struggle to squash them in case they somehow end up running and getting onto me. I've recently been able to vacuum them up, but even then I hate the thought of them whizzing up the tube past my hand. 🤢 Worst feeling as a child was chucking a heavy book on one, then lifting it to find nothing there!

Although I don't want my children to be scared, so if DP isn't there I pretend that I've put the spider outside and talk about how useful they are while trying not to think about them too much.

I didn't think you were supposed to put house spiders outside, as they die anyway?

Another vote for the London Zoo Friendly Spider programme. Its so well constructed - it took my fear from an 8-9/10 to a 5/10. I can survive with them now, can even trap and release small and medium spiders!

Eactly as a previous poster said - you learn that for us aracnophobes the fear of the spider is the same as the fear we would feel if say we were being chased by a man-eating lion. I say that the programme helped me give my brian the 2 seconds it needs to go from that initial fear to letting my rationale mind kick in. You also learn a lot about how spiders behave so now I understand better why they do what they do.

If thats not an option, I'd try a combo of hynotherapy and CBT. Good luck!

https://www.londonzoo.org/plan-your-visit/zoo-experiences/friendly-spider-programme

I'm with you OP. I've always had arachnophobia but it's been at its worst when I was depressed and permanently anxious. I used to have insomnia so I'd be up all night watching tv and I vividly remember a massive one running across the living room floor and I was just stood on the sofa sobbing because everyone was asleep so no one to catch it and I didn't want to step onto the floor to run upstairs to bed. Horrific.

I'm a lot better now but I haven't done much to help this really (apart from marry someone who catches them for me!) We have a lot of spindly ones and we don't get many others so I think they do help. They don't bother me because I rarely see them move and they're not black and scary! I still panic if one happens to be running towards me though!

I spend my life checking clothes, towels etc in case they're hiding in them and I'm always looking for them as I walk in a room.

The thought of doing the London zoo course makes me feel sick so I'll probably never get over it🤷‍♀️I can't even look at photos of them really.

Can't believe the amount of folk who still trot out the conker solution - it really doesn't work , I've seen house spiders walk past a bunch of conkers in my house, what a waste of time!

Yes just ensure they are not like my cat, who hides from them and miaws for me.

Get to know your neighbours. I went down to mine in my dressing gown the other morning to get her to remove one for me.

I don't want to be cured of my aversion, I want them away from me at all times.

I used a plug in once but impossible to tell what works. I just like to know I have people to call on to get rid of them.

@whatwhatinthebutt my old neighbours when I still lived at home used to hear me and my Mum scream and come running upstairs with a tupperware...that flat was horrific at this time of year. I bought my own house very soon after we moved there 😂
After I had moved out I once asked the man delivering my Chinese food if he could come in and get one for me...thankfully he wasn't a serial killer but I'd probably still have been more afraid of the spider if he was!

So many so-called adults on this post need to grow the fuck up and deal with teeny tiny creatures.

These same women then get offended when men call women hysterical. Is it any wonder when they're sobbing and shaking over a spider!

@Lilifer - they need to be fresh conkers, sometimes they run out & go dry

You are very ignorant and clearly have no understanding of phobias. Would you tell someone to 'grow the fuck up' (classy) over other phobias? How rude.

Another vote for the friendly spider course. It has been LIFE CHANGING.

As a fellow arachnophobia, fuck you.

I could have written this. Makes me hot thinking about them.

Every single dark object I see out of the corner of my eye makes me jump. My house is absolutely immaculate at this time of year so there's less for them to hide behind. I also don't sleep with the windows open incase they crawl in and it's boiling! It certainly rules your life.

I've thought about therapy but I've heard they ask you hold one to say it's been successful and it stops me wanting to try it.