Two under two maternity and lonely

[blueberry23]

Feeling pretty lonely this evening.

Since having my second gorgeous baby (10weeks old) I have quite a few friends who have failed to make an effort to visit or check in on me (a stark contrast to after my first baby! Is this a thing?!)

I know people are just busy, but it does hurt a bit. People I thought to be very close friends have also arranged and then cancelled a couple of times now, and I am thinking I won't bother rearranging and will leave it up to them.

Also not even really seeing my DH... by the time he's home and we've fed everyone and bathed and bed and tidied and eaten it's time for me to go to bed too as I'm shattered!! I'm sure this is normal but I'm really feeling the lack of connection here at the moment.

I just feel really lonely with lack of adult conversation and the day to day of two under two. I also know two other new mums who I've reached out to to see if they fancy coffee or a walk and they said yes but then haven't really made an effort to book a date in and I can't ask again feel like I'm being a bit pushy 🙈

I just feel a bit sad this evening. I have 5-6 very very good close friends which I know is very lucky but there are some people I would drop everything for, who clearly wouldn't do the same for me having shown no interest in me or my baby 10 weeks in.

I guess I'm just reevaluating

Is it normal for people to show no interest second time around? Am I just being sensitive?

Totally normal in my experience.

Sorry you feel down, I found it really isolating going from 1 to 2, no one had any interest in DD2.

Don’t think about it. You show interest in your beautiful child. That is all that matters.

(and yes, it is totally normal that people make a fuss with the first and not the second).

Congratulations, by the way.

How are you doing OP? I've just posted on another thread about mat leave and how different it is second time around if your first is at home full time with you instead of at school or childcare in the day. Going to baby groups etc is just stressful so you end up going to toddler groups and being unable to have any real conversation as you have one eye on the toddler at all times as well as looking after baby!