To choose trying for another baby or going back to University?

[Picklepepper1]

Not sure if this is the right place to put this but not sure where else it fitted.

So long story (kind of) short, I went to University when I was 20, during which I had the implant, was due to have it removed and a new one put in as I was one month over the 3 years it was effective. Low and behold whilst waiting for it to be removed I fell pregnant, so decided to drop out of my course and have my darling girl who is now 4. When she turned 1, me and my partner decided to try for another as we agreed we wanted another baby and would prefer to have them closer together. However, 2 years down the line and we still didn’t have a positive test and as it was during covid times, fertility issues..especially for a second baby, were not a priority for our GP. I got to the point where I felt like I couldn’t keep putting things on hold as was eager to get back to University and so we made the decision for me to go back when my daughter turned 3. Low and behold, 2 months into starting University, I finally fell pregnant. I stayed and completed my first year with the intentions of suspending my studies until my new baby boy was old enough to join the local preschool at the age of two (I live in a semi rural area, can’t drive and so it is the only preschool/nursery I am able to get him to but they do not except children till the age of two).

The reason for this post is that I can’t help but feel like such an urge for one more child but my partner has said that he is all for having one more, however it would have to be in the next 2 years because he is getting a bit older now (currently 35) and doesn’t want to spend his life returning back to having small children, which is obviously understandable (he also has an 11 year old). This obviously affects my plans on returning to uni as I cannot suspend my studies any longer then I currently am, nor can I drop out from my course and try again in a few years as I already used my ‘bonus year’ from student finance, and would not be able to afford the fees on our own.

So I have to choose between having a much wanted third but final baby, or returning to University.

Am I being unreasonable for leaning towards having a third baby?

I am so worried that I will get to an age and have regrets for not having one, however would never regret having one.

Obviously this all being said, I might not even be able to fall pregnant for a third time.

@Picklepepper1 Glad it helped. Good luck in your studies. Just a heads up there are grants and other financial assistance available for parents who are studying that are not widely advertised, so once your are registered go to student services to ask.

And have you found any that say that?
Quite the opposite actually. People leaving it and finding it harder.
The biological clock and woman bearing the brunt of pregnancy physically is a fact.
Degree OP.
By the time you finish you'll be the same age as many first-time mums. AND in a position to provide for your lovely children.

If you still need convincing have a look at the many, many, almost daily threads from unmarried mothers left in the lurch. Several kids, useless partners and no money.

Of course not saying that could happen to you but everyone thinks their partner will never turn on them. There's no guarantees and if you're unmarried you have access to none of his assets, and vice versa.

I think you should go to uni. You will have a better career hopefully and be financially more secure should anything go wrong in your relationship. If you have a third and your relationship broke down you would be up the creek.