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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think I am now unemployable

34 replies

Spicyy · 21/08/2023 00:32

I’m turning 26 this year and I just don’t know what to do with my life. I have a beautiful 4 year old daughter and she will be starting school in September. I’m a single parent and Ive not worked since my daughter was born. I’m desperate to start work again and have something to do with my time but I’ve applied for so many jobs and haven’t heard anything back. I’ve had my CV edited with professional help also. I’d love to do a diploma/access course but I don’t know if I’m too old for university and tbh my confidence is just so low, I don’t even know where to start. I doubt myself a lot and it all just feels so daunting. I was wondering if anybody has any tips. Thank you

OP posts:
Bosabosa · 21/08/2023 00:36

You are very young, i know people who have retrained in their early 30s and early 40s. You are not too old at all. You definitely can start your career at your age with a small child. Congratulations on all you have achieved so.far,.being a single parent is no walk in the park.Feel proud of yourself and think about what you wish to do next.

HirplesWithHaggis · 21/08/2023 00:37

You're certainly not too old for uni and an Access course sounds perfect for you.

continentallentil · 21/08/2023 00:37

Of course you aren’t unemployable, or too old for university. Job searching is hard though.

What do you think you might like to do? And what experience and qualifications have you got - and what work are you applying for right now?

greenspaces4peace · 21/08/2023 00:37

you're never too old to return to education.
can you invest in a long course or are short courses better?
what are some of your strengths? i'm pretty sure i've seen similar posts in the higher education section with 101 great ideas.
what barriers will make retraining difficult?

EvilElsa · 21/08/2023 00:39

Gosh, at 26 you are definitely not too old!!! Please don't give up. There is definitely a course or job out there for you. What would you like to do as a career?

Toomuchmarking · 21/08/2023 00:42

As you may be able to tell from my name I work at a university 😀
Do it! I teach many people in their 30's and older. I find them to be more engaged, interested and committed than a lot of younger students who are more interested in the social side. People often sacrifice more to come and want to get the most out of it. I know someone who went back into education in their 30's and loved education so much they now have a PhD and head up a research department. It's not easy but can be so rewarding.
There are lots of different Access courses so think about what you're interested in. What sort of career would you like? What can you see yourself doing? Law, nursing, social work, business, teaching? Some subjects such as teaching or social work virtually guarantee you a job once you've got your degree.
You could also look at a four year degree which includes a foundation year as you do that instead of access.

WhereYouLeftIt · 21/08/2023 00:43

" I’d love to do a diploma/access course but I don’t know if I’m too old for university"

I did an access course and went to uni in my early forties, so no, you are not too old. I'd say the majority of women on access were in your position (as was I), able to look to their own self now the little one was at school, ages ranged from 19 through to me, bulk was probably around your age.

Go for it!

poetryandwine · 21/08/2023 00:56

Hi, OP —

I am a former university admissions tutor and you are definitely not too old for an Access course or Foundation Year. Then university!

What are some areas you might be interested in training for?

QueenFlamingo · 21/08/2023 01:01

You're never too old to do what you want to do. I was a SAHM for 10 years. I have 3 DC and now work full time as a teaching assistant. I'm also older than you.
My DM didn't follow her career until my siblings and I were in our teens. Keep trying with work, something will come up and I can promise you, you're not unemployable

Hummmmaybe · 21/08/2023 01:19

Definitely not too old for uni!
Also if you so want a job beforehand, try a recruitment agency. I’ve found it easier to get work that way so it might help.

ABeesWings · 21/08/2023 01:28

You are not too old for uni.
When I was in uni there were quite a few mature students - all mid 30s and mid 40s with teenage children. They were very welcome in the classes too and no one batted an eyelid at their ages, they were a welcome part of the group.

Faz469 · 21/08/2023 01:32

Definitely not too old for university. I started my nurse training at 28. Been qualified 6 years now. Most universities love a mature student.

Go for it!

AllHopeandRainbows · 21/08/2023 01:33

No advice sorry as I’m in a similar position. Just posting for solidarity 💐
I’m even older at 32 and have had 6 (amazing) years with my DC and am now looking get back into work but no idea where to start and my confidence is at an all time low (applied for 2 jobs and didn’t even get more than a no thank you letter)
I think it’s normal to lose a bit of confidence but I’m keeping the faith that the right thing will come along eventually.
I’m deffo not opposed to going to uni and retraining at this age so don’t let it put you off. You are still very young with many years of working life ahead. It will happen I’m sure.

I have considered that I may start voluntary work once youngest DC is in childcare more, for something to put on the CV and get me back into the swing on things. Is this something you could consider?

WaitingforSummer77 · 21/08/2023 01:35

Do an access course! You will probably be surprised to find that you are one of the youngest people on the course!

iminvestednow · 21/08/2023 01:38

Teaching Assistant? School hours and help with money via UC. Surely you had a plan when you had dd at 22?

GrumpyOldCrone · 21/08/2023 01:38

I know someone who did an access course at 26. She now has a PhD. Go for it!

TyneTeas · 21/08/2023 01:46

What did you do before you had your daughter?

Original poster
Spicyy · 21/08/2023 02:03

Thank you everyone for your kind messages. It’s definitely just a confidence and self doubt thing that is holding me back but your messages have reassured me

Before I had my daughter I worked in a lettings agent and I got my NVQ Level 3 for that with City and Guilds. I would be happy to work in an estate agents again but have been seriously considering retraining. I have been looking into access courses for nursing but teaching assistant does also sound good to work around school hours

I did look into volunteering at my local hospital but their volunteer recruitment is currently closed as they work through their current applications

OP posts:
jeaux90 · 21/08/2023 08:27

Lone parent here too OP.

There are also a lot of government funded boot camps if you check out the government website.

A lot of them run for maybe 12 weeks and some are remote. Some of them organise interviews with potential employers at the end.

Have you considered moving into the tech space for example? There is a good thread in chat called Women in Tech with some decent entry advice on there.

I'm very biased I work in tech, it's very well paid and I get alot of flexibility as a lone parent.

Phos · 21/08/2023 08:31

Why don't you look into apprenticeships? It's no longer just about trades and hair/beauty, lots of options. The tech space, things like software engineer, data analytics etc is awash with opportunity now, or if that's not quite your thing, given your background there's also ones in business admin/business management etc. Not all are crap minimum pay either, many of the bigger companies (banks, consultancies etc) pay apprentices rather well. They'd provide better income and prospects than a TA job and more regular hours than nursing.

poetryandwine · 21/08/2023 10:27

TA and Nursing are very different. TBH you sound more interested in Nursing. You have looked into volunteer opportunities and mention that the great thing about being a TA is fitting with the school calendar. True, but your children won’t be young forever and I hope you can follow your dream.

You already have a Level 3 qualification, so that should give you confidence to begin an Access course. There is a severe shortage of Nurses right now. You will be very employable!

PaperBlue · 21/08/2023 10:44

Firstly, you are so young and of course employable. Teaching assistant pay is around £1k per month where I am so not a great salary but would be a start and school hours and term time only. I am not sure if the pay is over 12 months or not. Some contracts are just for one year which they may or may not renew each time.

Nursing would mean shifts which may be harder to do if you don't have much support.

My local highly regarded uni does a whole promotion to encourage mature students to come to university, it includes a finance meeting and they talk through contact hours and how you can work childcare into that. It is never too late. Look up your local uni, it is sometimes called something like lifelong learning or access to learning.

You could volunteer to build your confidence and get some recent skills on your CV too.

Jenn3112 · 21/08/2023 10:56

Being a TA and nursing are very different. If you go into nursing do you have anyone that can do overnight childcare for you? It may be that you need a short term plan, like getting a job in a school or a part time job in a health care setting if you can find one, and then a longer term plan like training for nursing if that is what you really want to do as university for nursing without good support will be really difficult as a single parent to a young child. I had 5 years out of work completely, the last year of that I spent volunteering and started a university course through the OU to get me ready to return to work. I started work as youngest started year 1.

Namechangerererererer · 21/08/2023 11:14

Do the access course. I'm 36 and starting uni next month! It'll give you school holidays off too which are a nightmare as a single working parent

Namechangerererererer · 21/08/2023 11:15

Nursing as a single parent probably isn't family friendly with the shifts, but one of the other allied health professions like speech and language or occupational therapy are more 9-5 type roles