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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it just me?

54 replies

Autieangel · 20/08/2023 08:26

So when Ive mentioned this to other people they look at me confused leading me to think this is a me issue.

When I'm driving and I pull up to a junction i sometimes forget to put the car into first so I will try to set off in second gear. In the past in older cars the car would make a noise I would instantly realise put it in the correct gear and set off.

Now in my current car the car will set off as tho there is no issue and then after a few seconds the engine will cut out completely leaving me halfway across a roundabout or in the middle of a junction frantically trying to restart the engine.

This happens in my car, my last car and my husbands car so I'm assuming it's a newer car thing. It seems really dangerous that a car will completely cut the engine out rendering you unable to move for being in the wrong gear. Does this genuinely never happen to anyone else?

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 20/08/2023 08:33

So basically you’re stalling the car, it’s not the car’s fault.

Holidaystress11 · 20/08/2023 08:34

You need to remember to put in first otherwise you will damage the car. Or get an automatic.

Mumof2teens79 · 20/08/2023 08:34

The car is stalling because you are taking your foot off the clutch too suddenly for second gear without enough gas/speed to keep moving in second

In older cars you couldn't start in second which is why you didn't notice this.
In first you would stall sooner

But I have been able to start in second in every car I have had. Not intentionally obviously. You can normally tell because it feels more sluggish and the biting point is different. This tells me that I am not in first and I need to adjust accordingly...

Once you start you should be fine as long as you release clutch more gradually with more gas....I think...I do it automatically and can't really describe what I do

Possimpible · 20/08/2023 08:34

Maybe take a refresher lesson... What seems really dangerous is that someone who thinks 'but the old car made a noise' is an excuse for poor driving

Cotswoldbee · 20/08/2023 08:35

If you can't manage a manual gearbox, maybe it is time to consider an auto?

Wolfiefan · 20/08/2023 08:35

They’re right. It’s a you issue.

FourEyesGood · 20/08/2023 08:35

This is definitely a you issue. Yes, you’re driving dangerously. No, it’s not the car’s fault.

cruffinsmuffin · 20/08/2023 08:36

I think from what you've described you are the issue in the situation, but just because you're doing the same thing (forgetting to put the car into first!) multiple times. The old car making a noise to remind you can't be relied on in newer cars, you'll have to teach yourself to remember. Have you considered as PP have suggested, a refresher lesson or automatic car? I love my auto, I don't have to worry about gears at all!

DustyLee123 · 20/08/2023 08:37

When I learned to drive, many moons ago, you put your handbrake on and gear into neutral for a junction. Unfortunately that’s not the way now, my DS was taught to put it in first while approaching the junction. Funnily enough his first car got a knackered clutch.

Ricochetsandwhich · 20/08/2023 08:37

Yep, definitely a you issue. It doesn’t happen to other people because they remember to put the car into first gear.

Get an automatic. They are fabulous and you will never look back!

Holidaystress11 · 20/08/2023 08:38

Agree Re automatic I love mine. Driving is less stressful (I hate driving) my nan thinks it's cheating...🤣 as long as it gets me from a to b I couldn't care if it is classed as 'cheating' 🤣

rainbowunicorn · 20/08/2023 08:39

Definitely a you issue. You sound like you maybe need to spend some time with a driving instructor for a few refresher lessons.
It's not the car thats dangerous, it's the way you are driving it.

VisionsOfSplendour · 20/08/2023 08:40

I know everyone's going to come on and say what perfect drivers they are but sometimes forgetting and setting off in second is hardly an indication you need to start driving lessons from scratch

Just make a conscious effort to remember to check before you pull away, of course the car will stall if it doesn't have enough power to start in 2nd

Xccccc · 20/08/2023 08:49

I get what you are saying. It happened to me on a junction too. I set off in second gear and it moved off but cut out mid junction. I would normally stall if I set off in the wrong gear but in this case it got me so far then cut out. I thought it was just a strange anomaly that just had happened to me 😁
I double check before I set off that I'm the right gear . You live and you learn.

AuroraForever · 20/08/2023 08:50

You won’t have enough revs and won’t be at the right speed for the 2nd gear so that’s why it’s stalling. The only time this won’t happen is if you set off in 2nd on a downward hill. There’s a reason we set off in 1st otherwise it wouldn’t be on the gearstick! The car isn’t to blame I’m afraid. Stalling is its way of telling you you’re not operating it properly. You’ve picked this up as a bad habit and you may be a danger to yourself and others if you’re continually stalling in traffic so I suggest putting a post it note on your dashboard to remind you and you need to make a conscious effort to start in 1st every time.

OilOfRoses · 20/08/2023 08:56

I've never done that but drive an automatic these days. Solves that problem.

Cosycover · 20/08/2023 09:02

It's just you.

This is dangerous. You will cause an accident sooner or later.

I don't understand how you can make the same mistake this often tbh!

Original poster
Autieangel · 20/08/2023 12:17

Ok so does everyone literally never stall their car? Or is it that your cars currently out instantly rather than drive into oncoming traffic and then stop?

OP posts:
ADHDDDDDDDBOOM · 20/08/2023 12:19

I have a newish car (it's 3) and I can pull away in second and it doesn't cut out.

My old cars, like yous, wouldn't have pulled away at all.

If I realise I'm in second with my current car, I just give it a bit more throttle as I pull away

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 20/08/2023 12:21

I wouldn't say I'm a perfect driver, but I never stall my car. I have very occasionally started in second, but no my car does not do what you're describing. I either realise immediately and switch to first, or I release the clutch more slowly and manage to carry on in second.

HappiestSleeping · 20/08/2023 12:21

Autieangel · 20/08/2023 12:17

Ok so does everyone literally never stall their car? Or is it that your cars currently out instantly rather than drive into oncoming traffic and then stop?

In the nicest possible way, it sounds like you stall regularly. Of course I have stalled, but it's maybe once every few years.

ADHDDDDDDDBOOM · 20/08/2023 12:21

Autieangel · 20/08/2023 12:17

Ok so does everyone literally never stall their car? Or is it that your cars currently out instantly rather than drive into oncoming traffic and then stop?

My car has this weird anti stall thing. It gives a boost when I'm abut to stall.

It's not impossible to stall but it's much less likely.

Its got a name, I've no idea what it is.

Conkersinautumn · 20/08/2023 12:23

If it starts to stall (which you can feel as the biting point will be all wrong) you should be able to increase your revs to cover it at most junctions, starting in second obviously has its place anyway

HappyMavis · 20/08/2023 12:23

"drive into oncoming traffic"

Jesus 😂

Conkersinautumn · 20/08/2023 12:24

Sorry. Second, most cars can manage it but the revs will need to be adjusted and you should.as a.driver be able to do that for.conditions that need it.