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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wedding woes

13 replies

Krampers · 19/08/2023 08:49

AIBU not wanting to attend second day of two day wedding as constantly being guilt tripped by mother of bride. Apparently the bride and groom have spent 150 per head. I have decided to attend day one but with finances being tight cant afford to travel to day two.

This is a destination wedding as well so expensive flights/hotel. Then the location of day two is quite far from where guests are staying for day one. There is accommodation for only select few at day two venue. We are expected to fork out 60 euros each way for transport to the venue. Apparently no other local hotels. Bride and Groom also not inviting everyone that has come to day two.

Just feel peoples demands are ever increasing. I am not even that close to bride and never met groom.

OP posts:
Original poster
Krampers · 19/08/2023 08:50

Sorry to be clear- travelling out for two wedding spread out over a whole week. Have decided only to do Day One which is over the weekend as can’t afford the whole week.

OP posts:
Bluevelvetsofa · 19/08/2023 08:51

Is the information that they’ve spent £150 per head intended to guilt trip you? If you aren’t that close to them, I’d decline the invitation. What they spend is their choice. You don’t have to buy into it.

Original poster
Krampers · 19/08/2023 08:51

Yes exactly that.

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 19/08/2023 08:51

Tell your mum to pay your costs?

Original poster
Krampers · 19/08/2023 08:53

you mean their mum? I would live to. These are old family friends but we are not that close as we live in different countries.

OP posts:
mrsbyers · 19/08/2023 08:53

Just tell whoever is guilt tripping how much you have spent to shut them up

Original poster
Krampers · 19/08/2023 08:54

Yes good idea. Just hate the fact that some are quite showy with weddings clearly spending a lot and expecting everyone to be in a position to do the same.

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 19/08/2023 09:08

But surely day 2 will become cheaper for them if you've RSVP no their food and drinks bill will be less? Unless you're dropping out last min?

AnnaMagnani · 19/08/2023 09:20

Not close to bride, never met groom and yet they expect you to go to a 2 day destination wedding?

Fuck that, they are lucky you are even going to one day.

Best advice I ever got when planning my wedding - no-one is as interested in your wedding as you are. I honestly don't think I like anyone enough to stick out a 2 day wedding.

heldinadream · 19/08/2023 09:45

@Krampers why are you going at all if not close to any of them? Different country etc, I don't get it?

Original poster
Krampers · 19/08/2023 10:20

Yes- definitely they would be spending less. However they want our presence. Not going would probably cause a family rift.

OP posts:
heldinadream · 19/08/2023 10:27

Krampers · 19/08/2023 10:20

Yes- definitely they would be spending less. However they want our presence. Not going would probably cause a family rift.

Whose family- theirs or yours or a rift between the 2?

NameChangerGameChanger2 · 26/12/2023 16:21

Zombie post, have deleted my comment

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