Hankering after the good old days

[SiouxseeSioux]

I really get why old people can get teary eyed about the good old days. 40 years ago I was a 17 year old goth/alternative type girl. We had a fantastic time going out & I loved my then bf so much, I thought he was so cool in the way he dressed & danced. Of course he dumped me in the end. He went out with some other girl & I met my dh. Dh has never been into music. Fast forward to now & me & my best mate for the last 45 years still go to the odd goth night. This latest one we went to last weekend has really got to me. Loads of songs from the 80's were played, the Cult, Cure, Bauhaus etc & it took me right back. Now I have become really tearful for those days, even though I've been happily married for 35 years!
I remembered at the weekend that even though my ex bf & I were a few months into our new relationships he did make a move on me at a couple of parties & we "got off with each other" I think that was the term we used in those days 😅
I even found him on Facebook today out of curiosity & downloaded his photo to show my friend. It's fair to say he's grown out of his gothic style. I havent thought about him in years & I have no intention of contacting him. I'd be mortified if he was to find out I'd downloaded his photo too.
Why have I become so teary eyed about my teenage goth years & how have i developed a crush on this 17 year old boy I went out with, even though I'm happy with dh? How can I get back in the moment? I really get why older people cry about the good old days. I'd give my right arm to be 17 again.
Sorry for such a long rambling post by the way

I understand. Some songs take me right back to 16 again, or the perfect summer when i was 18.
No advice to shaking it off, I embrace it and turn the music up.

Nothing wrong with a bit of nostalgia. It's comforting.

I'm a silly old goth of similar age 😎

But don't let it become an obsession. Remember to keep looking forward too- start a new hobby?

You and your DH take up ballroom dancing or something- start a new chapter.

Nostalgia. My life was pretty shite until I was about 18 so I very rarely long to go back.
A few days ago there was a Facebook thing about 80's Xmas decorations that came up on my feed and it reminded me so much of my grandma I was nearly sobbing.
This man/boy triggered happy memories of a good time in your life, that's all.

It's easy to look back at the past with Rose tinted spectacles. Partly because the realities of life hadn't occurred yet, although I'm with you that being a teenager in the 80's was fab.

Although proportionately, I earned a lot less money, it seemed to go further even when I bought a house and had a mortgage. Life just seemed simpler. Maybe I was just too young to think deeply about anything, or too self centred.

I think music was better then too. Not just because it appealed to my taste, as not all of it did, but because it was more diverse. I'm going to sound like my parents now, but mostly it all sounds the same these days. It appears that there's only one fashion too, all the young people look like clones.

I hope they're enjoying their lives as much as we did, but I fear that they aren't. We never had social media to deal with or to worry that our stupid antics would end up on YouTube forever.

Even nostalgia isn't the same as it used to be 😉

I completely understand OP 😂 I’m still waiting for John Taylor from DD to propose 😂

You and your DH take up ballroom dancing or something- start a new chapter.

You are seriously suggesting this to a goth and a man who's not into music?

Yep - nothing more gothic than waltzing to Danse Macarbre in a tattered gossamer gown, your forgotten dreams trailing behind you in drifts of fraying silk.

🧛‍♀️🧛‍♂️

(Almost anything can be goth- with the right outfit and soundtrack 😁)

I’m early 50s and get nostalgic for the old days, more late teens up to about 30 but I know it wasn’t all roses then either. I think I just know I’m now looking towards retirement and having to prepare for that rather than thinking I have all the time in the world to do x, y or z! I would love to go back to uni days for 24-hours clubbing with my friends, snogging randomers, meandering round town in a Saturday etc!
I keep on telling my DD to make the most of her uni days (she does now but had a rocky start) as they’re probably the most carefree. Both my DCs have anxiety, properly diagnosed, and esp w DS now I’m thinking - just go out there and go for it as you’ll turn round and be too old one day…

I would watch the hell out of this if someone made a documentary about it, though! Though only if the OP dressed like Siouxsie Sioux throughout…

@DatumTarum you might have something there! Our grandparents generation had their tea dances with their war time waltzes & Glen Miller boogie woodies. We were musing what our generation would have for our tea dances when we've lost the inclination for a night out. Pogoing to the Sex Pistols, skanking to ska?
Gothic tea dances! (only if the room is dark & not very well lit of course)

@HappiestSleeping yes the 1980's were fab & yes the youngsters have looked like plastic clones for years; and don't get me started on lip fillers, bum & boob fillers etc 🤣
@Goodadvice1980 Tony Hadley was my dream, when New Romantic movement started. Too Cut a long story short blew me away & he was gorgeous in The Freeez.