To expect nursery to clean DCs face?

[Dirtyfacebaby]

Exactly what the thread title says.

AIBU to expect nursery staff to keep my child's face relatively clean? Every single day when I collect her she looks absolutely feral. Face and hair covered in dried snot and god knows what else.

I don't just mean a little bit dirty, I mean she looks like a street urchin.

Probably not related OP as nurseries are germsy places but the messy face thing is still a problem!! It takes two seconds to wipe her face.

@Dirtyfacebaby your kid will be fine. I promise. Kids are snotty, messy, mucky monsters. They get grubby. Even if they've been wiped up a few minutes before. It's a gift. I promise they'll make it to adulthood unscathed.

Rubbing their snot into their own eyes can cause conjunctivitis.

I wouldn't be happy with that at 14 months. Later they are trying to encourage independence, so I'm not concerned about my 4 year old coming out like that. Little ones should be cleanish, paint or mud or similar aside.

Is that how you treat your own children though?

@cyncope my children are now 21, 18 and 14 and have had varying degrees of grubbiness. They have all survived and now know how to wipe their own faces and wash their own hands.

Kids get mucky. It's kind of their MO.

We had this when my eldest was at nursery and I was not impressed and told them so. They too said they encourage independence but she want capable of that until much older. It didn't happen with my son as I reminded them of that at the get go. Leaving dried up snot on a child's face which is then harder to clean is not meeting any kind of standard.

I'd change nurseries. Makes you wonder what else they're not doing, and how much they're actually looking out for your baby if they shamelessly allow them to leave looking all disheveled.

Also forgot to add. I've worked in many nurseries, and quite a few of them were quite neglectful of the babies and toddlers, which is why I left and why I would never put my child in one before they could talk.

If its food then yabu. The daycare mine went to had food then they had warm washcloth for each child's face and hands. Mine never came out a snotty mess

It's heartbreaking isn't it. These little ones already have to go through the ordeal of being away from their mothers, to then not be allowed the most basic level of care and attention is really sad.

My 15 month old DD is in nursery 2 days a week and always comes out clean with a new nappy, and she has her clothes changed throughout the day when they get messy from activities. Kids get grubby and that is normal but there’s a difference between grubby and needing a bath at the end of the day and having a snot & food encrusted face, that is just unhygienic and spreads infection. YANBU I’d be bringing it up with the nursery.

I don't see an issue with children being encouraged to be independent with things like washing and dressing, provided they get assistance when they need it. It would take long time for staff to do it all for every child and doesn't help the children to learn. Many children in preschool room will be many will be starting school so independent skills are important.

It's not heartbreaking or an ordeal, most children who go to childcare manage just fine without it causing lifelong trauma. Mother's really don't need this kind of guilt.

Doesn't sound great. Our nursery bring DC out in a fresh nappy, clean clothes and face. Even if they've been doing painting nursery will try and get them as cleaned up as possible.

@Invisimamma I'm all for teaching independence but a lot of nurseries are just leaving them to it rather then guiding them and showing them how to, which is what a parent would do. It does borderline on an excuse to neglect them in my experience.
I think little ones do suffer in some of the bad nurseries im afraid, and I personally found it really heartbreaking to have to look after dozens of babies who should have been getting one to one. Obviously you're not going to find it heartbreaking because you're just there at drop off and pick up, but to see them when they're there is really sad. I know mums don't need the guilt but I care more about the little ones then I do about the mums feelings sorry.

Her child is 14 months old. Not a rampaging 3 year old.

We're having this issue too. My 18 month old has been regularly passed back to my DP plastered in so much dirt that he's had to be changed and wet wipe bathed before he can go in the car seat.
My DD (toddler) never has her face wiped and her hands are always grubby too. She always comes out covered in snot 🤢.

Seems to have escalated over the last 3 weeks and as my baby has eczema, not wiping his face could cause an infection as he always has open sores there. We've recently had a word about them letting him play in water in just a nappy as we'd already told them wet skin causes his eczema to flare up.

This is a posh village nursery and is neither understaffed nor has unhappy/overworked staff. I know they've had a bit of a move around of staff/promotions etc so I guess this could have caused it but it's starting to piss me off now - it's hard to know where to draw the line though.

I have to get them home on the bus tomorrow and it won't be possible for me to be washing them down and swapping clothes on a busy road with no proper pavement. So tomorrow is likely to be the day I lose it over this issue 😄.

My DD always looked like this at a previous nursery, and so were the other kids when I picked her up. I moved her. One of the things that appealed when I looked round the new nursery was that none of the kids were caked in snot. It's basic care in my view.

If you sent your little one in like that every day they'd be making a referral. No joke

Are you mot paying a great deal of money gor your child to be looked after? Surely keeping her fed, hydrated and clean are the basics?

Kids gets mucky.

The adults caring for them clean them up.

That's the system. Not kids get mucky....and they stay that way until they're old enough to care for themselves.

This isn't actually what you want OP. Them leaving her dirty all day and then quickly wiping her at the end so you don't know how low the standard of care is shouldn't be the objective! You want them to wipe her after each meal/when she has snot running down her face.

I have to pack 2 or 3 sets of spare clothes for my DC, and more often than not they all come back in her bag dirty and bagged up. So I know my nursery are cleaning kids up after a dirty activity and changing them into clean clothes.

I do think it's basic care.

That's not to say DC comes out pristine, they come out in that, I've had the best day - I take socks off and sand/glitter is everywhere, haha.

There was one time I had to pick up at an earlier time for a doctors appointment, DC came out really grubby and I was so embarrassed going to the doctors. So I can imagine the feeling I'd have if I collected them like this every day.

I think it’s one of the hazards of outsourcing. Rarely will anyone pay as much attention to the detail as you would!

Outsourcing anything, that is, not just childcare. I’ve had the same with nursery, care for elderly parents, people doing work on the house. They don’t always focus on the things we do.