Parents penalised for formula feeding

[thechristmaspudding]

I just wanted to open up a discussion to find out the perspectives of other parents on this subject. I would also be interested to hear the opinions of midwives, health visitors and other health care professionals involved with families.
To give a bit of background information, I am a member of the Boots parenting club, which has many parents are likely to be aware gives you access to discounts and offers on baby related items in store. I went into my local boots today to buy my son's formula, hoping to get a good deal as I had been notified of an offer in store. Now, in my sleep deprived state I did not read the offer properly and it did clearly state that it was an offer for follow on formula and not infant first. The cashier was very polite and explained that due to government regulations shops are not legally allowed to offer discounts on infant first formula due to the government expectation that breastfeeding should be encouraged for the first six months. To be clear, I am not taking issue with Boots or any other shop, but it got me questioning whether this is fair? No, I do not believe that formula companies should be able to dissuade women from breastfeeding through aggressive marketing campaigns that encourage parents to buy their product. But surely parents have the right to weigh up the pros and cons of bottle feeding and make an informed choice that reflects the needs and circumstances of their own family? I tried really, really hard to breastfeed but found it extremely difficult and due to a lack of postnatal support gave up (the inadequate breastfeeding support in this country is another issue in itself). This is something I still regret and struggle with. However, my personal experience aside, formula feeding is a valid choice to make whether parents decide to feed this way from birth or at a later stage.
I also remember watching an episode of dispatches a few years ago on how due to the cost of formula many families resort to watering down their baby's feed or even to stealing. This is a situation that is likely to have worsened as a result of the cost of living crisis.
So my question is, AIBU in thinking that it is wrong to penalise bottle-feeding parents when it comes to the cost of formula?

Why would someone actively choose a more unhealthy option for their baby if they didn't have to? Do you also support a mothers choice to drink in pregnancy?

In the end I have a huge amount of sympathy for mothers who have been let down by lack of breastfeeding support be it physical or mental and of course those who formula feed because of adotion etc. but if you're choosing a less healthy option for your baby against all medical advice because you don't have enough time or you just don't like the idea then maybe you need to question if you have enough time to raise a child or if you're in the right frame of mind to put someone's needs above your own

I gave an example. I didn't sum up anything. You compared first. I too just pointed out it isn't comparable and it was in reference to the breastfeeding argument. It's a different way of living and then I gave a mere example. I can see you are being obtuse so I will leave it at all. Ultimately its non of your business if a mother chooses to bottle feed. Mind your own breasts.

And the same, right back at you (though yours took longer to write)! It was light-hearted. 😎

and your qualifications are?

Most of the 'benefits' are correlative not causative, hence when you look at sibling studies, they all but disappear, bar an increase in tummy bugs and ear infections (which is a huge factor in developing countries, less so in the UK).

Wealthier women tend to breastfeed more. They also tend to be able to afford better food, longer maternity leaves, more likely to have private healthcare and a myriad of factors which make them likely to be healthier. You could make the same correlation with a detached house, or owning a BMW.

Even if there is a benefit, it's only seen on a national level, not for the individual. For what it's worth, the child that I chose to FF is in perfect health, perfect weight, and thriving. My bf child (for over 2 years), has an incredibly serious life threatening condition which.

How dare you suggest that those of us who don't want to breastfeed shouldn't be mothers.

@Ghan some people don't have a choice. Some of us know that breast is (scientifically) best, but we're unable to produce milk. I feel you highlighting that we need to have a 'grown up conversation' is just a way to make FF mums feel bad.

Because formula is a perfectly valid, safe & healthy alternative to breastfeeding
Because no one is entitled to a woman's body without her permission, not even her child
Because correlation doesn't equal causation
Because some of the benefits of breastfeeding are overstated
Because breastfeeding is such a small part of parenting overall and it doesn't automatically make you a better parent

The ’grown up’ conversation about nutrition needs to be around the food weaned children are eating.

The amount of UPF and dodgy marketing tactics aimed at children and encouraging huge portions is really the health epidemic we are facing, not whether someone was FF.

Yabu you were never penalised.

@Laserbeam24 - C+G and Aptamil are both owned by Danone. Nutricia Danone - full name

Absolutely.

Theres a ‘meme’ about both formula and breast fed children all going on to eat McDonald’s chips off the floor of the car. They nearly all end up at birthday parties drinking juice and stuffing their faces with crisps and sweets, after being weaned onto packets of ‘foods’ made by exploitative companies. Even the crisps and snacks aimed at children said to be made from vegetables or whatever are absolutely loaded with salt and sugar. Yet women will attack each other over breastmilk and formula.

But formula is UPF.

There’s plenty of aggression coming the other way too.

But a lot of people do use packet food and children’s snacks. I see this most of the time when with children of similar ages. Same as most people but convenience food. And this is being marketed at us and our children too. A lot of children don’t have a good diet 90% of the time unfortunately, it’s why there is a lot of obesity in children.

This with bells on

BF wasnt for me, didnt want to for many reasons with number 1 being - i NEEDED my body back. I couldnt be the only food source.

I say i was lucky milk never came in cos in societies eyes i had a 'valid' reason for not BF. I was met with pity when asked why FF, i didnt need pity, i was happy to FF
BF would have made me a horrible parent

That suggests you think that the formula companies made the rule not to be able to discount. The legislation was made by government to, amongst other things, stop people switching brands from cheapest milk to cheapest milk, which isn't great for baby's tummy.

That's not at all why the legislation exists. Because it's not true.

This is an utter myth. As if it would be remotely ethical for the cheapest milk to have inferior ingredients. The ingredients in formula are regulated. Companies add in things to justify the price on “premium” brands but there’s no evidence they have benefit - because if anything is found to have proven benefits, it then becomes mandatory for all manufacturers to add it. But essentially formula is cows’ milk, vegetable oil, sugar and vitamins. There’s basically no difference between the brands, cost is no indication of quality (it is about trying to attract a different category of consumer, see previous discussion on the thread) and if anything, switching brands is beneficial as it means babies get a slightly different taste which more closely replicates the experience they get with breastmilk.

Don’t disagree more needs to be done by professionals and that’s for the Government to sort, it’s the personal direct message I’m referring to. Who tells another mother, who may be struggling mentally and physically unable to feed her baby, that her baby is more at risk of death. You just don’t do it. It’s wrong and not that person’s responsibility. I wouldn’t walk down the street, go over to a mother using a bottle and say something like that, I very much doubt anyone would but sat behind a computer screen suddenly the gloves are off and people say all sorts of very harmful things. It’s not their place to say it. A medical professional who knows the mother’s full circumstances can give advice. Not a total stranger.

I'd say this about covers it?

I find the chip on the shoulder posts hilarious. Ultimately, breast milk IS better for babies than formula milk. Pointing that out does not mean the women who breastfeed are looking down on women who formula feed. Fine, you tried, you didn't have enough milk, you didn't have enough support, your nipples were inverted, your baby had tongue tie, you were struggling with your mental health, you wanted to split the feeding load. That's fine, no problem, all sensible reasons. But to pretend that formula is just as good for babies as breast milk is simply not true and nobody should have to say that just to protect your feelings. Just as nobody has to pretend that chicken nuggets and chips is more nutritious than homemade food containing lots of fresh veg - everybody knows that's not true, but that nuggets are something that will fill your kid's tummy and that's ok.

I say this as somebody who has inverted nipples, breastfed one baby and combi fed the other. I don't give shit how anyone feeds their baby, but I do know that my first baby received better milk than my second, but I equally don't feel bad about that in the slightest.