To think this has nothing to do with MIL?

[Thanksitsmac]

AIBU to think it’s none of MIL business whether I take my child to a toddler group or not?

She is constantly telling my husband that I need to take her, and how ‘very very important it is for her development and her future’?

For background, 16 months old, she is a very happy, sociable and outgoing child. Has no problem interacting with others and no development concerns. We used to attend a group which ended when she was 12 months, since then we have tried a few toddler groups but they haven’t felt like the right fit. Also most groups tend to be in the morning when she is having her nap. Several times a week we will go to the park, indoor play or similar child focussed activities like farms etc.

So AIBU to think that I’m not damaging my child’s development and future by not attending a toddler group, and that MIL should keep her opinions to herself?

Personally I do not think your are being unreasonable.... But here's a thought, why doesn't your mil take her and you could have a few hours to yourself?

Why does your dh tell you this? Weird.

It is not of her buisness but as she gets older hopefully the nap time will move , so she can soicialise with other children

I never took mine to toddler groups, we did plenty but the thought of a toddler group made me shudder. They ended up going to nursery at 3 and settling in really well and made loads of friends so it clearly didn’t harm their development. They’re now in primary school and love it. Your DD will be fine! And yes your MIL should butt out.

I agree they are great not only for your child but for you too. But it's not your MILs place to comment.

Look, my MIL thinks I’ve damaged my child by having him aged 39, not giving him siblings, going back to work after mat leave, giving him an unusual name (she thinks all babies should be called John, Anthony, Thomas, Margaret or Katherine — maybe Carol or Kevin if you’re feeling very adventurous!) AND both DH and my surnames, not baptising him, sending him to a secular school etc etc. Fortunately she never says this to me or DH, only to her daughters who sigh and say ‘Right’ and change the subject.

I, on the other hand, think it’s hugely irresponsible to have had five children before you turn 24 when you’re dirt poor and raising them in two rooms over a shop, with barely enough money to feed them, especially when you then behave as if this was a duty sent you by fate and are continually congratulating yourself for your savvy.

I’m actually very fond of MIL, but she has the self-knowledge of a hamster, and the tact of an enraged bullock.

Of course it’s none of her business. It’s a pretty small thing to get worked up about though - just ignore it and tell DH you’re not interested in hearing about it.

She does socialise with other children when we go to indoor play etc, just not in a toddler group setting. She also has cousins a similar age who we see at least once a week.

Probably, but it’s not the first time she has made inappropriate or overbearing comments since my daughter was born, so that has probably impacted my response.