To feel old and ugly?

[Fedupwiththis1]

Due to having ulcerative colitis and rheumatoid arthritis at 38 years old. The conditions have caused me pain and had lasting effects. I have swollen knees meaning I look horrible in dresses and skirts. My stomach constantly looks pregnant as I bloat easily. My hair which was already thin is even more so now due to my medication. My teeth have suffered although improving with treatment. I can't run anymore and struggle with stairs. I feel fatigued a lot of the time so often look pale and exhausted.
Feel I have lost sight of myself and feel old before my time. Aibu to feel like this, I know I should be grateful as others have it worse and I lead a relatively normal life but sometimes it gets me so down.

That sounds really difficult. I only have UC and it’s knocked my confidence looks wise and when I’m a flare it absolutely impacts my quality of life. I can’t imagine dealing with two conditions.

I found making sure my ferritin and iron levels were okay helped with hair loss as did using regaine. I also spend more on self care than I used to like hair appointments and getting my eyebrows done. Sorry you are feeling down though, I can totally get why x x

Thank you x

We all feel old and ugly compared to 10 years ago, and in 10 years we will look at what we are now and probably feel older and uglier. Don’t stop it letting you enjoy your life. Don’t criticise the mirror or analyse the photo. Enjoy being out and about, meeting people, cherishing what you have

It sounds tough dealing with those conditions at your young age OP. I am a bit older but have also developed some stuff which is not doing much for my looks so I know what you mean. It’s important to work on it, because feeling better about how you look will make it easier to cope with the things you can’t change.

Focus on making the best of your best bits - if you have to wear trousers and longer skirts and dress around your stomach there are ways to do that (and endless threads on the subjects).

Get your bloods done if you haven’t and see a good trichologist or a dermatologist specialising in hair (you GP can refer you to latter though will take an age). light reflecting make up and thickening hair products will do a lot. Bobbi brown counter make overs are good.

My fangs are going. Rotten as f
Never been good as a child born in the 50s. Skin crepey. But hey are you a nice person? Makes a great deal of difference to
people

Have bloods done all the time. Am quite low on iron/ferritin but can't eat a lot of healthy foods which would help get the levels up, as causes me issues.
The hair thing is probably genetic as well as caused by meds. All the female members of my family are practically almost bald at the back of their heads despite some only being in their late fifties. With genetics and meds, it's worse in my case.
I am a nice person. Just hate feeling this way and want to look physically better. I am not a young woman anymore but too young to feel this old and unattractive.

Ahh Op. sounds crap, I’m sorry you feel that way.
So much if this is outside your control-have you tried little things to make yourself feel better? An eye brow wax and tint completely changes my face and makes me feel “made up”. A manicure makes me feel a bit more polished and finished. I often use a bit of Dove gradual tanning moisturiser after a shower, gives me a glow.
Im not saying you should or have to do these things, but I can relate to your OP and these are little things that make a difference to me x

That's the hardest thing. So much is out of my control.
Thanks for the reply x

This thread reminds me of a page in The Twits.
IMO it's a very true concept. I've known beautiful looking people who have been judgemental horrible beings and you can definitely see it on their faces.

Keep being you OP, you've been through and are going through some shit, and if you can still be a nice person in the midst of shitness you're doing a pretty good job 🌸

I try but I can't help but feel down at times x