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AIBU?

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Original poster

Would you stop work early for excruciating period pain?

43 replies

popgoesthepup · 11/08/2023 16:05

As in, the worst you have had in your life?

I am lucky to wfh so usually I can get through it, but now I can't sit up. I want to curl in bed with a hot water bottle. I've taken painkillers. I don't think I've ever had it this bad. It's agony.

I work until 5.30 officially. I never take sick days so I'm tempted to just log on later when it passes but I have completed my work for the week so there would only be last minute emails at this point.

People will say I'm weak and women have carried on with periods in the war, 16 hour days etc but I've never felt pain like this.

OP posts:
Hoppinggreen · 11/08/2023 16:05

The kind of period pain I used to experience would mean that this wasn’t even a question

monpetitlapin · 11/08/2023 16:06

People will say I'm weak and women have carried on with periods in the war, 16 hour days etc but I've never felt pain like this.
Those people are arseholes. Most of my periods are agonising. Just finish and feel better.

Pip1402 · 11/08/2023 16:06

Yes of course! Transfer that pain to any other affliction and you wouldn't think twice about it. It's no different just because it's caused by your period. You're suffering so you need to rest.

Original poster
popgoesthepup · 11/08/2023 16:07

Before anyone remarks, I am on on my phone which I can just about manage in bed. That's different to sitting upright at my desk in home office with screens and laptop.

I have a work phone that alerts me to any emails or messages with me.

OP posts:
LittleAlexHornn · 11/08/2023 16:07

I have endometriosis and I can't work because of it, there's no employer that would be happy with me taking 1 week off every month. Period pain can be absolutely awful.

TheDonsDingleberries · 11/08/2023 16:08

Yes, and I absolutely have done.

Log off and feel better soon.

KinooOrKinog · 11/08/2023 16:09

Log off. You're ill. I assume you work for a large company, so no way should you put their business in front of your own health.

The same thing happened to me years ago too. My periods were fairly normal until one month I was doubled over in pain. Very, very heavy flow, cold sweats, nausea, cripped in agony to the point I considered phoning an ambulance. I put up with it for about three years before I went to see about it. Turned out I had an STI. So see a doctor as soon as you can.

WedTheBed · 11/08/2023 16:10

Yes, I arrived in office at 9am a couple months ago, immediately came on my period and the cramps started. The type where it throbs through your pelvic bone and into your thighs, where you feel sweaty and disgusting.

I went home at 10am and logged off for the day. I also work from home bar one day a week we go into office.

if you applied that pain to your head, or your chest.. you would stay home. Why is our womb any different?

Olinguito · 11/08/2023 16:12

Absolutely. You shouldn't be expected to work when you're in agony, whatever the cause.

Greffabtra · 11/08/2023 16:18

I have endometriosis and like @LittleAlexHornn I can't work due to how much pain I am in for my period and ovulation plus other days of numb legs, brain fog and fatigue. Period pain fucking hurts. You only have to watch all the videos doing the rounds with men being hooked up to period pain simulators who can't handle it.

My own Mother told me I just had a low pain tolerance, that was before I was diagnosed. Sod anyone believing you, you know you are in pain so stop worrying about it.

Pinkitydrinkity · 11/08/2023 16:24

100% take the time off and don’t feel bad about it.

i have endometriosis too and there have been times when the pain is all consuming - then there’s the shakes, sweats, nausea, headaches, clots that come with it too!

LittleAlexHornn · 11/08/2023 16:26

Greffabtra · 11/08/2023 16:18

I have endometriosis and like @LittleAlexHornn I can't work due to how much pain I am in for my period and ovulation plus other days of numb legs, brain fog and fatigue. Period pain fucking hurts. You only have to watch all the videos doing the rounds with men being hooked up to period pain simulators who can't handle it.

My own Mother told me I just had a low pain tolerance, that was before I was diagnosed. Sod anyone believing you, you know you are in pain so stop worrying about it.

I was fobbed off and told I have a low pain threshold too - it's so patronising, and wrong.

I think women who have never suffered with their periods are actually the most dismissive.

I think because of the endo, my actual pain threshold is very high.

Giggorata · 11/08/2023 16:28

Too right I would.
Before the blessed wonderful menopause, I would have at least one day off per month, with agonising pains in belly, back and, for some reason, knees.
Solpadeine didn't touch the sides, either.

megletthesecond · 11/08/2023 16:30

Yes. I used to have to take a day if my period started on a work day.

Greffabtra · 11/08/2023 16:37

@LittleAlexHornn so true. Really bad period pain is not normal but we are constantly told "most women seem to be able to cope" actual quote from a male GP to me at 20. Took 10 years for diagnosis.

I think there has been a big push by BBC news to feature endometriosis stories and women are starting to see GPs and get things like HRT and pain relief for periods. We wouldn't be dismissive of any other pain. No woman should be left curled up in bed to deal with it. I hope OP gets some relief soon.

LapinR0se · 11/08/2023 16:38

Yes. I have endometriosis and it has definitely stopped me working before. Horrific

LubaLuca · 11/08/2023 16:39

I would for any excruciating pain, it wouldn't matter what caused it.

Hoppinggreen · 11/08/2023 16:41

For all those ladies suffering like this can I recommend you try the following?
A couple of Asprin?
Mindfulness?
Yoga?
Exercise?
A positive attitude?
A warm bath?
A hot water bottle?
Aromatherapy?

I am of course joking but I am sure these are all suggestions we have heard before 😒

Coffeedrinker34 · 11/08/2023 16:41

I wouldn't even start working with excruciating period pain.

tattygrl · 11/08/2023 16:51

I once continued working at my supermarket assistant shift (tills and stocking shelves) throughout some of the worst period pain of my life. My vision went red (As in, physically, my vision was tinged with red), and I was almost disassociating from the pain. I think it's because the pain was so extreme that I didn't think straight and continued working, because I was in no fit state and suffered horribly.

OP, take the rest off. Look after yourself.

tattygrl · 11/08/2023 16:53

Hoppinggreen · 11/08/2023 16:41

For all those ladies suffering like this can I recommend you try the following?
A couple of Asprin?
Mindfulness?
Yoga?
Exercise?
A positive attitude?
A warm bath?
A hot water bottle?
Aromatherapy?

I am of course joking but I am sure these are all suggestions we have heard before 😒

Haha love (and hate) this 😂

At my worst period pain, or even my normal period pain, I couldn't fathom lounging in a hot bath. I needed to pace, moaning and repeating garbled feverish words and phrases, and have cool air on me. My mum used to comment it was like I was in labour! The idea of taking a nice walk or submerging in a hot sweaty bath tub was anathema to me. I now have the coil but removing it soon... dreading it.

TregunaMekoides · 11/08/2023 16:53

I have severe period pain and very heavy periods. I have to work around them sometimes. Anyone who says it's weak or any other such nonsense clearly has had a life of blessed periods!
I would absolutely finish early. YANBU

ClaireEclair · 11/08/2023 16:55

Yes, I have done several times. I have endometriosis that was at some points so painful I could hardly breathe. You should get it checked out!

I emailed my boss with information about my condition letting him know that I might have to take time off or finish early and he’s totally fine with it. My work also gives emergency days for period pain so we don’t have to use sick days (I’m pretty lucky come to think of it). Good luck! Never feel guilty for taking time off for period pain! It can be excruciating and exhausting!

PurpleSteak · 11/08/2023 17:22

I'd stop anyway and just check emails later if the work is done.

And in severe pain I'd stop and just check nothing urgent needs dealing with later, when I'm able. Depending on the role I may or may not let someone know what I was doing.

Charrington · 11/08/2023 17:37

I haven’t suffered with period pain and of course I have enough imagination and empathy to understand that my experience of periods is not yours.

Of course you should take time off for pain you poor thing.

And of course, women like me shouldn’t be forced to withdraw from society while we menstruate, or be barred from work. There was a time when drawing attention to menstruation difficulties was a problem because it was used to try and put all women back in their box. And some women did put up with horrendous pain for the sake of the sisterhood. But the end goal was to get to a point where we are equally valued as people, and where any man or woman in need of workplace accommodations should be able to get them.

We’re generations on from that point now where we needed martyrs. Take the time you need.