To contact again when she ghosted me

27 replies

NorthStar2231 · 11/08/2023 13:54

I made a friend when I was pregnant with my 2nd child. We were literally glued at the hip. Got on so well and spent a lot of time in each other’s company.

We made the decision to leave the area where she lives and had a bit of a difficult job actually moving (several house losses and a stressful time) but we did have to move for work and eventually we moved house too.

Since we moved for work, conversation with her was sparse. She rarely responded to my WhatsApp’s. We have a lot of connections in the area where she lives and visited regularly but she didn’t respond to meet requests. She was pregnant during this time. I thought maybe this was why she was off and left her to it.

Eventually, I sent her a WhatsApp wishing her luck with her birth but said I won’t be messaging her anymore as she doesn’t respond and she ghosted it. This was well over 6 months ago.

Do I try and reach out again or is this unreasonable at this point? We were such good friends and I miss her. I also don’t like having bad blood and I don’t really know what I’ve done to deserve the ignoring?

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NorthStar2231 · 11/08/2023 17:09

MolkosTeenageAngst · 11/08/2023 14:14

I think if you sent a message saying you won’t respond anymore you essentially burnt any bridges and made it clear you weren’t open to a friendship unless she was able to give it energy and headspace whenever you wanted her to. I think it would be too late to rekindle the friendship.

Maybe if in future you have a friendship where the other person starts to become less responsive the better way to handle it, at least initially, would be to reach out and say you’ve noticed they haven’t been able to reply to your messages much lately, that you hope everything is okay with them, miss them and are here if they need to talk. That kind of response would at least leave the lines of communication open rather than angrily putting a load of guilt and blame on them without even trying to find out whether there was something going on behind it.

Your second half of that message was how it was worded. I left the ball in her court to respond and she never did. There was nothing angry about it.

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NorthStar2231 · 11/08/2023 17:25

GoodChat · 11/08/2023 15:10

I agree with everyone else. You said you wouldn't message again so just delete her number. The friendship is over.

Thanks all, number deleted and I will clear it from my thoughts.

I sent a well wishing message as my last one, wished her luck with her birth and happiness for her family. That was it done and dusted as you’ve all said quite rightly.

I appreciate the response

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