First time posting as I can usually find advice from reading other people's posts!
My mum has always been uninterested in anything I do, and I get the feeling she only asks for details because she's expected to know, it feels like my grandma or aunty have asked and she hasn't known, rather than her wanting to know because she's interested herself. For example, she never asks where we are going on holiday, when I say we've booked something, or if we've had a nice time afterwards, or she'll see a post on social media and try and figure out where I am, rather than just asking me where I was.
Anyway, my partner proposed and we decided that rather than worrying about anyone else, we'd get married abroad. My main reason to do this was so I wouldn't let my mum's lack of excitement ruin my own. I told her 4 months ago that we'd set a date. She hasn't asked about it since. We get married next week and yesterday she text to ask me: when do you have the children again, when do you go on holiday and what date do you get married? I haven't replied, as tbh, I'm really hurt that a week before I get married she's asking what the date is, by text!
This is my second marriage and she didn't agree with my choice for first husband (we were married 15 years) so refused to come to the wedding reception, and didn't do any normal mother of the bride things like look at dresses etc with me which afterwards she said she regretted. I had hoped she'd want to this time as she likes my fiancé but she hasn't even asked what I'm wearing, or spoken about it at all.
Does anyone have any coping tactics for stopping myself from letting her disinterest ruin my excitement? Oddly, she's very good with my children, and much better at being a grandparent than a parent! Should I reply with the details or tell her I'm upset she's known about the wedding for 4 months and is only asking when it is a week before??!