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Original poster

Estranged family member asks to borrow a tenner?

63 replies

Jamjarcandlestick · 06/08/2023 20:31

A second cousin, 19M, who I’ve not spoken to for at least three years, and had limited contact with before then has just asked to borrow £10 via FB messenger (we’re not even friends on FB).

He said he doesn’t speak to his family anymore so can’t ask them for help, but he’s got a tenancy inspection tomorrow and his flat is a mess. Apparently he’s got plates everywhere and no washing up liquid. He says he’ll pay me back when he gets paid.

I’ve also not spoken to my cousin for three years therefore I don’t feel particularly comfortable reaching out to him to see what’s going on. I know my second cousin left home around then when he was kicked out of school/got in a lot of trouble with the police.

OP posts:
KissyMissy · 06/08/2023 21:25

Tricky one! If do this as a one off

roarrfeckingroar · 06/08/2023 21:49

I'd give anyone desperate enough to contact me in these circumstances £10.

Original poster
Jamjarcandlestick · 06/08/2023 21:59

I sent it over.

I know it's not going on washing up liquid.

Whatever it's going on he must be fairly desperate. I won't send him anymore.

OP posts:
MistyMorningMelons · 06/08/2023 22:03

I would assume it was drug money tbh. I would make contact with someone who might have a better idea what's going on.

Lindy2 · 06/08/2023 22:05

I'd be worried that it's either a scam or he's involved in drugs and absolutely desperate for money to feed his habit.

The washing up story is just really odd.

Is there anyone you are in contact with who knows his current situation. I think I'd be making some calls to other family members to find out a bit more about his current situation and where he is living.

Middlelanehogger · 06/08/2023 22:07

This is the most obvious scam I've ever heard of, would people actually send money to someone they weren't in contact with who reached out out of the blue via FB messenger?!

"Sorry you can't pop over with scourers yourself, I've, uh, moved house to somewhere else, yeah, really far away..."

Mollypolly2610 · 06/08/2023 22:14

How long has he known about the inspection? He really didn't hear about it today

BananaSlug · 06/08/2023 22:16

I would just send it. Not sure how it can be a scam if they aren't even friends surely scammers would message people on the friends list how would the scammer know the op is his cousin?

howdoesyourgardengrowinmay · 06/08/2023 22:18

Solongtoshort · 06/08/2023 20:51

It’s Sunday night, where is he getting washing liquid from now, l can’t even imagine where the nearest shop is open to me know, l am really central in town .

Co-ops stay open late, there are 24hr convenience stores and supermarkets, depends where he lives

KDPC841922 · 06/08/2023 22:20

A family member did this to me, I knew it was drugs/alcohol money so didn't send it

caringcarer · 06/08/2023 23:33

Jamjarcandlestick · 06/08/2023 21:59

I sent it over.

I know it's not going on washing up liquid.

Whatever it's going on he must be fairly desperate. I won't send him anymore.

I think you did the right thing OP.

10HailMarys · 07/08/2023 00:54

Sounds like a scam to me. I doubt it’s even him.

PurpleReindeer2 · 07/08/2023 01:08

Probably a scam. I'd have asked a question he knew the answer to, to check it was really him.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 07/08/2023 01:11

As a one off, for a tenner, I'd send it so I'm glad you did.

But if it happens again, probably not.

mondaytosunday · 07/08/2023 01:12

£10 isn't going to by much more than a bit if weed. But it dies sound like a scam, any way of verifying it's actually him? If you can I'd send it.

Whatswhatwhichiswhich · 07/08/2023 01:43

I don’t think you can buy drugs for £10, but I don’t use them so I can’t be certain. From all I’ve heard they’re really expensive though.

FindingMeno · 07/08/2023 01:58

Scam!

FirstDayOfHoliyays · 07/08/2023 03:26

Surprised that people actually send money to fbook scammers. Why would you?!

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 07/08/2023 03:57

I just assumed they had either talked before in messenger or that they gave enough information that the op knew it was them!

It would be silly to just assume they were who they said they were without some additional details.

POWL01 · 07/08/2023 03:59

No

dontgobreakingmy · 07/08/2023 05:54

Give him some washing up liquid

FloofCloud · 07/08/2023 06:37

I'd assume drug money, not sure what £10 buys but we had a joiner who worked for us for about 6 weeks, he was great to start with then kept asking for £30 in advance to get fuel to come over and wouldn't turn up. He was a friend of a friend and they kept tapping him for 20-30£ - seems he got into pain with his back and drugs got quickly out of control ... no doubt he's tapped his own friends and family and now he's going through his phone book - he'll ask again with some kind of sob story

LupusGranny · 07/08/2023 07:01

I had a relative who did this. Once she had run out if close relatives to borrow from ( yes it was drugs) would start on the wider family and friends she had not had contact with for years.

Don't lend it to him, he will be back for more once he realises you are a soft touch.

FinallyHere · 07/08/2023 07:09

I wouldn't without checking in with them using a different method to contact to rule out that their account had been hacked.

The number of people here who report that they would just unquestionably send the requested funds goes some way to explain why these scams are so popular.

FloofCloud · 07/08/2023 08:12

Are you in touch with family much closer to him? Maybe speak to them and see what is happening with him

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