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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Toddler Behaviour & Hospital anxiety

1 reply

Cakeandcookies · 06/08/2023 16:29

I am starting to get more and more concerned by my toddlers behaviour. He is 3.5. He has always been a kind, affectionate and sweet little boy. But in the last 6-8 weeks he has started kicking, spitting, and saying FS (he even says it in the right context) :(
We have spoken with him about germs, manners etc then ultimately tried to ignore it. It turns out that a little boy at nursery is kicking him as he has bruises on his legs, has spat in his food and he told us that one of his key workers said FS and now he seems to love the word as he loves her! I work in education and am utterly mortified. We have spoken to the nursery, who were a bit sheepish, apologised but the damage seems to be done. We are pulling him out at the end of the month as we he is moving to a school nursery more local to us. It's just constant.
For context, he has a 9 month old sibling. Our journey was a tough one, I was so ill after his birth that I nearly didn't make it and am in and out of hospital a lot and awaiting surgery, I just can't bare to leave them again and am terrified. We have done our best to keep things as normal as possible for him but I can't help but feel this is also bubbling away beneath the surface as he gets extremely upset if I have to go back to the hospital as he is scared I won't come home. We use big little feelings, talk lots, read stories, have a daily timetable etc. He also won't share much about his day and it has been suggested he may be on the spectrum. Any advice mamas? Please don't shoot me down - life is hard enough atm!

OP posts:
MatildaTheCat · 06/08/2023 16:55

No advice as such but I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time.

A long time ago I had a very very difficult toddler/ little boy. He was extremely clingy, bit occasionally, cried whenever he was left and probably swore too.

He has grown up into a well rounded and loving man. It was a phase. A long and difficult one which got worse when a sibling arrived.

Be calm, loving and consistent and have consequences for saying rude words and other challenging behaviour. If he’s feeling anxious the boundaries will help him feel safe.

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