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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Can't do life anymore

22 replies

reallylow · 05/08/2023 09:22

From the outside it probably looks like I have a good life, people probably wouldn't understand why I feel the way I do. But honestly I cannot do it anymore. I'm exhausted. I feel so alone I literally don't have anyone. Feel like i must be the only person in the world who feels like this 😢

OP posts:
Eyesopenwideawake · 05/08/2023 09:24

I'm so sorry you feel this way. You're not alone. What's going on in your life?

Flowers
Nagado · 05/08/2023 09:27

You’re absolutely not. You’re not alone. Speak to your doctor and ask for some medication. And if you find yourself lower than you’ve been, please call the Samaritans. You don’t have to have a difficult life to struggle to cope. That’s not how emotions work.

Malarandras · 05/08/2023 09:28

You aren’t the only one. Please talk to someone. Doesn’t have to be family or friends. Lots of charities offer support free and anonymously. Or speak to you GP. You don’t have to go through this alone. Take care of yourself please 🙏

OpheliaPlum · 05/08/2023 09:28

Definitely not alone. Would it help to tell us about some of the things that are overwhelming you?

Ouchhh · 05/08/2023 09:31

You're not alone Op ❤️ I'm so sorry you feel this way though, please speak to your dr about how you feel xx

JustaChristian · 05/08/2023 09:34

You are not alone. If you have money to pay the bills and are not homeless, then the loneliness can be tackled. Join a social, vibrant church and keep going out of your way for your own self until you find some stability based on what makes you feel lonely

JustaChristian · 05/08/2023 09:36

I lived alone for the bigger part of my adult life, travelled solo many times, did solo restaurant dates, never felt happier in life being on various adventures. When the time was right, I met a man. But in between I always would go out and hang around places like hobby groups, churches, choirs and hop, you make friends and there is something going all the time in my life. I know you might have issues which are not included in the post, but if you are in England , every area of life is pretty much well covered and sorted ( at least this is the impression they want to portray on mumsnet LOL )

Anniegetyourgun · 05/08/2023 09:39

Sometimes, if life is hard, you don't even have time to struggle, you're too deep in trying to do things. When the pressure is off your brain has time to pay attention to problems and everything often crashes in on you at that point. It does that thing like when you take a car out of gear but leave your foot on the accelerator - it whirls and roars pointlessly. For a stuck accelerator, you see a mechanic. For a stuck brain, a doctor. There is no shame in looking for help.

And heck no, you are by no means alone. Mostly people who feel like you do aren't talking about it. Maybe they don't have anyone they can trust, or don't want to burden another with their problems. If talking helps, this is a good place to start, where no-one knows who you are so you can't be judged.

Original poster
reallylow · 05/08/2023 09:40

I have no idea where to start with explaining it all. I have a toddler, I'm on my own a lot of the time and feel like I can't be a good mum so I'm failing, I have work stress, I have a lot of difficult transitions coming up that are emotionally very hard for me, I've been made to feel shit by a friend this weekend, I have very little contact with family and no support around me, and to top it off I'm trying to diet and I'm becoming obsessed with it, at times I'm skipping meals and I weigh myself 3-4 times a day. If I eat more than 1000 cals a day I feel like I'm fat and I've failed. I just feel really isolated above all else. Like I have no one to turn to.

I haven't stopped crying on and off for around 24 hours. My little one keeps asking "mummy alright?" when I'm crying. She's only 2. I feel so awful she is seeing me like this, it just adds to my guilt.😢

OP posts:
AlfietheSchnauzer · 05/08/2023 09:42

reallylow · 05/08/2023 09:22

From the outside it probably looks like I have a good life, people probably wouldn't understand why I feel the way I do. But honestly I cannot do it anymore. I'm exhausted. I feel so alone I literally don't have anyone. Feel like i must be the only person in the world who feels like this 😢

I feel exactly the same way. No friends, no partner (I'm a widow), only my elderly mum who I don't get along with and due to
my disability I'm isolated. Just wish there was a pill I could take with 100% efficacy

Eyesopenwideawake · 05/08/2023 09:50

You've made the hardest first step by posting so please congratulate yourself for being brave and honest.

The first thing you need to tackle is your diet. Being short of nutrients will only make you feel worse which will lower your mood even more. You didn't gain weight overnight and you won't lose it overnight so please slow down, eat good quality protein and set yourself a realistic target.

Original poster
reallylow · 05/08/2023 10:21

@Eyesopenwideawake

This is the thing - I'm not even overweight. My bmi is normal (21.7) but I hate how I look and I'm obsessed with the scales and what I'm eating. My partner thinks I've got a psychological problem and need help. Maybe I do.

OP posts:
Original poster
reallylow · 05/08/2023 10:22

Thanks to everyone who's replied, it has made me feel less alone.

OP posts:
LetMeEnfoldYou · 05/08/2023 11:01

I'm lying in bed crying, every part of my life is either partially or completely fucked and I've been doing my best to smile and cope.

Today, I can't. I'm fucking broken. So broken.

Standingongrass · 05/08/2023 11:07

You say you literally have no-one but have referred to a partner and a friend?
What is making you feel alone?

Standingongrass · 05/08/2023 11:08

LetMeEnfoldYou · 05/08/2023 11:01

I'm lying in bed crying, every part of my life is either partially or completely fucked and I've been doing my best to smile and cope.

Today, I can't. I'm fucking broken. So broken.

I’m so sorry. I know how you feel. Flowers

Original poster
reallylow · 05/08/2023 11:54

Standingongrass · 05/08/2023 11:07

You say you literally have no-one but have referred to a partner and a friend?
What is making you feel alone?

Partner works away a lot. "Friend" has really upset me so I'm not counting them as a friend really. A couple of other friends around on the periphery but no one who I can truly open up to.

OP posts:
Original poster
reallylow · 05/08/2023 11:55

LetMeEnfoldYou · 05/08/2023 11:01

I'm lying in bed crying, every part of my life is either partially or completely fucked and I've been doing my best to smile and cope.

Today, I can't. I'm fucking broken. So broken.

So sorry 😞
I'm right there with you.
Hugs x

OP posts:
LetMeEnfoldYou · 05/08/2023 12:04

Thank you.

Eyesopenwideawake · 05/08/2023 12:21

Maybe I do.

Yes, lovie, you do. You could do long term damage to your health which isn't good for you or your daughter. Have a chat with your GP about getting help before it gets out of hand.

LetMeEnfoldYou · 05/08/2023 12:22

reallylow · 05/08/2023 10:21

@Eyesopenwideawake

This is the thing - I'm not even overweight. My bmi is normal (21.7) but I hate how I look and I'm obsessed with the scales and what I'm eating. My partner thinks I've got a psychological problem and need help. Maybe I do.

I am finding it harder and harder to put food in my mouth. I know how you feel.

LetMeEnfoldYou · 07/08/2023 23:08

How are you doing @reallylow ?

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