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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

brother in law

8 replies

madcatladieshere · 04/08/2023 22:41

My lovely brother will have nothing to do with my DH family. He has no reason not to get on with them as they are lovely. We are due to go to a family wedding and my brother and in laws have all been invited. My DB will be civil for my sake but it is obvious he doesn't like them. I've asked him on several occasions what is the matter but he clearly is not going to tell me. It makes family occasions very difficult. My DH has noticed it but tells me to leave well alone. There has never been any arguments but there is definitely an atmosphere when they are together

OP posts:
DarkModeDear · 04/08/2023 23:15

DH is right. Leave it alone.
You’ve asked your brother and he isn’t going to tell you. You might be glad he won’t if you knew what it was. It could be something that makes you see DH’s family in a new light!

sheworemellowyellow · 04/08/2023 23:27

Well obviously something is going on that you don’t know about. The people who love you think it’s best you don’t know. Leave it be, if you trust them. No good will come from opening this wound.

determinedtomakethiswork · 04/08/2023 23:31

Does he have a problem with your husband in particular or with all of his family? Does he ever come round to your house?

nowtherearethree · 05/08/2023 00:16

My DH and DB get on really well. It is just my MIL & FIL that he seems to have an issue with. I feeling like begging him to tell me. My DB is a nice man

DarkModeDear · 05/08/2023 22:15

If he’s a nice man then he is not telling you to save you from knowing.

BusyMum47 · 06/08/2023 10:04

Do I have this right?...Your brother doesn't like your in-laws? Yet they're seemingly nice people & continue to invite him to family events?

I'd tell him not to bother coming to anything anymore. If he's got some sort of inexplicable reason for not liking them that he's ridiculous & childish enough not to tell you about then he needs to back away & stay out of everything.

Why would he want to go to things anyway if he apparently dislikes them? Sounds very odd. How old is he? Do your parents know what's going on?

Dirkyone23 · 15/08/2023 14:40

Hi op ,would it be possible to update on your thread? I am not sure why but I'm intrigued to know what your brother knows and won't tell you. He will let you know he doesn't like them, but not the reason, that might also be a little incompassionate towards you

Ducklake · 15/08/2023 14:44

What was the AIBU or even the question?
Perhaps OP was just off loading.

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