Scared of flying so not sure if that's skewing my judgement re kids flying

[lovemymonkeys2]

Taking the kids on holiday abroad in a few weeks, will be their first time in an airplane. They are both very excited (4&6). I'm absolutely terrified of flying, I have ocd and the main symptom is having really catastrophic thoughts about things. I've always been absolutely awful at takeoff and landing although can be a bit calmer during the actual flight. By awful I just mean that I normally cry, not hysterical or anything. I think it's a combination of the build up and worrying about it, the noise, the feeling of being out of control etc. I know that for my children's sake I will be able to hide my emotions, plus they are both sat next to other family members on the flight just incase. However, what I'm wondering is should I prepare them in advance, like should I tell them that there will be a loud noise when they plane sets off, that they might have their ears feel funny etc or is it worse to build it up too much for them? I have no idea as I don't have a normal perspective on it

I'd say nothing to them tbh apart from very positive messages about how exciting it'll be and all the family who'll be there etc etc.

Best case scenario and very possibly most likely they will love it and be perfectly fine, no reason to tell them they might be scared etc ..

Hope it goes great for you and then!!!

Nope, just talk positively about how exciting it all is, and when it comes to the flight the family members they're with should act as everything is completely normal (which it is and will be).

No need to talk about it unless the kids ask, and then answer honestly. Cabin crew are often happy to explain odd noises and bumps to first time fliers too, if they have time.

Thanks both, I thought it might be best not to mention anything other than positive things but just wanted to check as like I say my view is very skewed, the only thing making me doubt things is that my son is very sensitive to noise, but hopefully he will be fine. They've been very excited that they will get to see the clouds etc.

Mine flew at that age and were totally unbothered about the noise etc of take-off. DD did complain about her ears hurting though and we made sure she had a sweet to suck on the return

@QueSyrahSyrah thanks for the advice. I find the flight crew to always be so helpful, when I've had particularly bad flights in the past they've often helped me to calm down and will explain everything to me. I always tell them when I board that I'm a very nervous flyer and they are always nothing but helpful, hopefully they will be with the kids too!

I think the Speakmans are great, they often cover this topic but this is a top tips video

I would warn them that their ears might feel funny but stress the upside (sucky sweets!) and get them to practice yawning, make it fun (if you can’t do that in light hearted way get the other family members to)

No don't make a big thing out of it. You might stress them out instead of helping. But maybe some noise cancelling headphones for your son, just in case?

@Orangello that's a brill idea I didn't think of those, thank you!

DS can be sensitive to loud noises so last year when we went on a plane for the first time that he'd remember, I talked him through it as we did it, any earlier and I think he would have spent a long time being worried about it. Taxiing from the terminal was literally 'we're going to the runway now, when the pilot's ready we're going to go really fast and it'll get noisy but once we're in the sky it won't be so loud anymore' and then we did it and he was absolutely fine. Just be factual and keep all the emotion out of it if you decide to prep them

I am scared of flying. My kids don't know this.

Although the man on the plane sat next to me and my youngest last time we flew could clearly see I was terrified and trying not to let on to my 4 year old! So they'll doubtless cotton on at some point but I don't want to pass my fear on.

Have you ever tried going on one of those day-long fear of flying courses? I did one, with Virgin I think, quite a few years ago and it really did and continues to help.

I think kids just go with the flow, I wouldn't mention noises etc. but maybe have some sweeties ready and say tell them to ask Granny or whoever they're next to for a sweetie if their ears feel funny.

Good luck, I hope it goes well for you.

@lovemymonkeys2 im terrified of flying too. I get diazepam from the doctor-not enough to knock me out but enough to control the panic so I don’t freak out.