to really hate the term, fulltime mum, as if working others are only part time mothers?

[roboass]

why do some people insist on calling themseleves fulltime mums, as if us working mums are only part time mothers or something?

yes bumped into someone i know, we got talking about work, she said she was planning on staying home with baby, so i sadi oh so your going to be a sahm then, to whuch she replied rather snapily, well we don't stay home much do we sweety sweety to the baby but i will be a fulltime mum yes

maybe it was the way she barked at me, or is it offensive to call someone a stay at home mum

And that's another thing! I spend most of my working day thinking, worrying about and talking about about the DC's. And quite a bit of my time at home thinking about work

I agree lollipop, I still think of myself as a professional. Most of the stuff I have to fill in is for stuff like the car and home insurance though, where it does actually matter what I do all day.

ormirian I spend most of my working day thinking, worrying about and talking about about the DC's. And quite a bit of my time at home thinking about work. i do this too, when i have a shower in the am im thinking of work,when im at work im thinking of my baby,like now

im not sure about working and being a mum is having it all and its a great balance, as it me it feels like a bloddy hard long slog

I am SO not a housewife, but I guess I am a sahm, though I run a business from home, so I get a bit cheesed off when people call me a non-working mum. And anyway...what mum doesn't work ffs???!!??

I have done both: went back to work when DD was 14 weeks old (she's a one and only too, so I look back at that with a bit of regret) BUT I quite enjoyed having a break from it all tbh. I am now a SAHM, which doesn't imply I work or don't work, but just states what I do..I stay at home. I can't see the offence in the term, but each to their own!

It certainly is a hard slog, robo! It certainly is.

It sounds to me like she thought you were having a pop at her, so had a pop back.

To be honest, I would have just said "oh good for you" or something rather than giving her a label. You may not have intended it to sound like that or be offensive, but it sounds like she took it that way.

Why do we all have to fit into these boxes though? It doesn't matter whether I'm a SAHM, WOHM or whatever, what about me - the person I am - rather than the things I do or don't do.

yes i agree surfer, relecting back i think she may have taken me calling her a stay at home offensive, i shall try to refrain from labelling in the future.

It's down to the two meanings you can give to the word 'mother'.

1. Mother refers to a woman who has a child. And so of course a mother is always a mother by this definition.

2)'Being a Mum', or 'Mothering' can refer to the jobs that a mother (or substitute) does

• so while I'm at home with my kids I am mothering them, although of course I am always their mother, regardless of where I am.

A mother who works outside the home spends some time 'mothering' (taking care of)her children, and some time doing other work, although she is, of course, always their mother.

It's semantics.

I happily refer to myself as a 'full time Mum', with no offence intended to Mums who work outside the home.

Sounds like she was on the defensive as many SAHM are. Personally I think we're all full-time mothers, we're all responsible for our children 24/7 whatever we're doing?
I hate the fact that housewife is such a negative term. I actually know a colleague who apologised for leaving work to become a housewife. It made me so sad she felt she had to apologise for her choice. She was pregnant and have a one year old and a six year old, being a housewife was the best decision for her family at that time and certainly best for the kids and yet she said sorry like she was ashamed.
We all need to start supporting each other and stop judging each other.

"Sounds like she was on the defensive as many SAHM are."

LOL! Just like, er, mothers-who-go-out-to-work then

I prefer to call myself "a lady who lunches"

or sometime I say I am retired

or sometimes I say " I don't work" in very disdainful tones, to wind the questioner up

who cares what others think, I don't

LOL IOta. I say "I don't work" too, and feel rather decadent

I think I would rather enjoy saying 'no I don't have to work' in dismissive tones.

yes OI - it can be rather fun

Scarily though, I might be getting a part-time job soon

I will then have experienced the full set of roles:

full-time working mum

full-time SAHM

lazy ar$e SAHM with children in school

part-time mum

i do wish we wouldnt all be so dmaned sensitive to perceived scorn from others. why should we give a rats arse what people we dont even know think??

Hm, that is a better way of putting it. Perhaps I should say "oh no, I don't work, my husband keeps me". Might freak DH out a bit though.

ooooh, yes, I shall, from now on, be 'a kept woman'

Well I am a
full time mum,
full time uni student,
Part time worker,

I don't mind the term housewife. I take it to mean someone who looks after the house, cooks the meals, looks after the children etc. What's wrong with that?

I work occasionally but not set hours so I tend to fill forms in either as the 'homemaker' type option or part-time employed depending on whether I've been working that week or how I'm feeling about beign at home!

I have never liked the term housewife and would never have refered to myself as a housewife, I am not married to the house (might as well have been), sounds old fashioned to me.

gosh I think you're looking for something to be offended about.....

"No I am not going back to work, I am self nannying"

"Yes I am going back to work, I will be a mummy accountant"

At the moment I am favouring

"You say you haven't seen me in the office for a while? I took a long loo break".

we are all mums, such sub-divisions and nomenclature are unhelpful, divisive. i don't actually care (or ideologically bother)with any other mum doesbecause i am too busy with my own stuff