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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Give baby same name as next door neighbour?

18 replies

Howdoidoboundaries · 02/08/2023 12:49

Our second DS is due to arrive in a month. We have nearly decided on his name but I'm getting cold feet because it's the same name as our next door neighbour's 12 year old son. We get on well with them and they're lovely neighbours. Would it be weird for us to use the name? We don't socialise together but are friendly and do neighbourly favours for each other. Their kids are lovely too.

OP posts:

landoflostcontent · 02/08/2023 12:53

Call your baby the name you want. He will have it for the rest of his life and in time won't live next door to or even know the child who already has it. Not weird at all.

HoneyIShrunkThePizza · 02/08/2023 12:57

If you don't socialise with each other I don't see the problem. And presumably it's a fairly obvious choice and not Ballonz?

Blueskysunflower · 02/08/2023 12:58

Not remotely weird. I wouldn’t name my baby the same as a sibling or a cousin or my best friend’s kids, but the name of a neighbour’s child wouldn’t even be on my radar. Go for it without a second thought.

Possible exception if it’s a very unusual name and it would be an obvious copy like Prince Starburst or something.

LubaLuca · 02/08/2023 13:02

Use the name you love. That girl next door won't always live there, you'll move away, they'll be flattered if they care at all.

FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 02/08/2023 13:03

My son and my neighbour's son were born two months apart. We unknowingly gave them the same name (we'd never spoken before, as they're 4 doors down not next door). The boys are best friends now and it has never been an issue.

I had my second son and my favourite name was the same name as a different neighbour's son. It's actually his middle name now.

WhiteFire · 02/08/2023 13:03

A neighbour had a baby 9 months after I was born, the Mum came over and asked my Mum if she would be ok with her baby having the same name, Mum was "sure, why not?" Tbh the name fitted with the older child.

We were the same year at school, there was more of us anyway when we got to school.

12years old? Not a problem (well it wasn't when I was a baby)

HeddaGarbled · 02/08/2023 13:05

My neighbours were flattered when I told them I’d given my baby the same name as their teenager. It’s like endorsing their taste, IMO.

Sparklesocks · 02/08/2023 13:06

Do it. It’s not likely you’ll be living next door to them forever anyway.

Blueroses99 · 02/08/2023 13:09

My cousin didn’t use their favourite name (which would also have honoured a relative) because it was the same as the kid next door. The neighbours moved away before the baby was one…

pontipinemum · 02/08/2023 13:45

Use the name, you're not friends and you most likely won't live next to them forever

mn29 · 02/08/2023 13:48

Use the name you want, your neighbours are barely acquaintances and you or they could move away at any time. If it's a top 100 name there'll be plenty of others around anyway, it's just a mild coincidence that one lives next door.

toastofthetown · 02/08/2023 13:58

I wouldn’t think twice if the name is common like Harry or Oliver. If it’s something like Lysander or Wolfgang then they might think you’ve copied them. Still wouldn’t put me off if I loved the name though.

Original poster

Howdoidoboundaries · 02/08/2023 14:57

Thanks everyone, much appreciated. I'd say the name is somewhere in the middle of the scale between Oliver and Lysander! It's in the top 100 in Scotland where we live, but fairly low on that list. As an aside I absolutely love Lysander but not brave enough to use it!

OP posts:

honeylulu · 02/08/2023 15:17

Top 100 is fine! Neighbours come and go so have the name you like.

A friend of mine gave her son a name she'd made up (it's similar to two other names so doesn't sound totally bonkers, people assumed it must be family surname or something). She was rather taken aback when one of his friend's mums gave the same name to her new baby because she liked the sound of it. That would be a bit strange!

I love Lysander as well by the way! Middle name?

IglesiasPiggl · 02/08/2023 15:23

The only time I would avoid using a name is if a close family member who also shared the same surname was called that. Every other situation is fine.

Bookchildtable · 02/08/2023 15:40

My parents chose to change my name last minute because they found out neighbour planned to use same name and we would be in same class at school. I honestly wouldn't have minded and infact their were 4 of us with same name at school so I'd have been better off being known by same name as neighbour.
In your shoes with that age gap I'd use the name.
Two people I know have used the same first and middle name as dc1, I found it odd being both names but it hasn't ever bothered me and dc1 was proud to have babies named after them.

CurlewKate · 02/08/2023 15:42

I'd tell them first, though.

User3735 · 02/08/2023 15:50

I think it's fine, but I'd probably mention it was on your list beforehand. When a friend used my child's very unusual name I remember feeling taken back when I saw it announced on Facebook, and that it was odd they hadn't said. But when a neighbour a couple of years later asked if I'd mind if they used it too I was flattered and appreciated the heads up (also relieved they mustn't have heard me shouting it so much it put them off 😂)

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