At what age did/does your child…

[Pixieb34]

Do things for themselves? Things such as wash themselves, brush own their teeth, get themselves a drink, get themselves some cereal for breakfast, dress themselves?
I know there maybe different ages for these particular tasks to be done independently but by what age would you expect they’re able to do them all?
My kids (now teenagers) could definitely do them by 7. AIBU to expect that a 7 (almost 8 yr old) could do these without just asking someone to do them every time?

I was advised by the dentist last year that my seven year old DD had really healthy teeth but that she really needed to be brushing them herself by this age. Six months later at her next check up the dentist said to put a watch on one of her teeth as she might need a filling! I was furious and I’m back to brushing her teeth for her now.

She can get her own breakfast if necessary, wash herself, get dressed etc so I’d say 7 or 8 for these things but I’m going to brush her teeth for a while longer. She is capable of doing it but clearly not throughly enough and it is so important to get it right.

My 8 year old can probably do them all but honestly, he is on his own planet and can barely put his socks on without being told. My 6 year old can do them all (and does) but he's just a bit more of a go getter!

I wouldn't let them brush their own teeth though. My friend is a dentist and she said that children just won't do a thorough enough job. I don't know when I'll stop doing it but it won't be soon.

My 2.5 year old can dress herself without help and sort her own breakfast so I’d certainly expect a 7 year old to be able to.

If they can’t (and there are no developmental delays) then their parent has failed them.

It is not healthy or doing your child any favours to do everything for them and not teach them to be independent.

My 7 year old can get herself dressed and brush her teeth, she can get her breakfast but if I don't pour in the milk she will likely spill it. She can wash her body but not her hair properly. She has dexterity issues though so I'm aware other kids her age may be more capable of doing such tasks compared to her. For example she very much struggles with buttons or laces. We just encourage her and let her practice.

At just 6 DS could:
Wash himself
Do teeth (but i do an extra job to get them done well)
Tie his shoelaces
Get himself dressed
Measure oats & milk and cook porridge on hob (supervised)
Make a sandwich or wrap
Get himself a drink

Of course a degree is willingness but we a) encouraged/celebrated learning to do these things
b) to a certain extent, refused to routinely do for him things he was more than capable of doing for himself

Where I am the dentists encourage you to brush their teeth for them/help them brush their teeth until they are at least 10 to make sure it is done right.

I'm not expecting my kids to be able to do most of these things by themselves until they are 7 or maybe 8 (barring brushing teeth which will be later). Eldest (6) can take on/off his own clothes except socks he struggles to put on still, and can put on/off his own shoes (velcro), that's about it, he could probably pour himself some cereal, I expect milk would go everywhere if he tried that though and he can't open the fridge due to the vacuum seal yet, hence he will maybe start doing some of these things at 7 or 8.

My 7 year old can do all of those things and has done for a while but would need reminding as easily distracted.

Some things like getting their own drinks and breakfast are more about just how the family works. It's not beyond the skillset of many 7 year olds but there are a myriad reasons why a particular 7 year old might be used to an adult still pouring their cereal or operating the toaster.

They all get there in the end, and I would expect these are all things most 7 year olds could master if it's a priority. Apart from maybe teeth brushing. Self reliance is good but there's a balance, sometimes helping the child is a nurturing thing and we shouldn't be too quick to judge. I remember a documentary about adoption showing a child of about 8 being spoon fed. It was a therapeutic thing because they'd been neglected and missed out on that experience when they were little. I've often thought about that when my own children have wanted "babying" a bit and I've never regretted indulging them.

Wash, drink and dress yes, he does however need some help on hair wash day (he’s 8).

We aren’t a cold food family, so we don’t really have a breakfast snack meal he could do on his own. He’s eight and will still supervise brushing, our dentist recommendw supervising until eight and then regular checks after that.

Wow! Do you do a hot breakfast every morning? 😳 That's impressive.

Nobody has yet mentioned drying hair and cutting toenails. I think these are a slightly different category and interested in people's experiences of slightly older kids doing these things...

My 7 year old can do most of these things but needs to be reminded/asked usually. He will get himself dressed without asking if he is going somewhere fun though.

He needs a bit of help turning the shower on (can't reach) and I usually make breakfast and drinks (galley kitchen with high cupboards - easiest if it's just adults in there, especially if the kettle or oven are on)

Ds 3.5 can
help himself to snacks/ drinks
Take himself to the toilet
Brush his own teeth (badly😂)
Undress himself but needs help getting dressed
Takes shoes off and can put some on but struggles with certain pairs.
Will wash himself in the bath while I'm in the shower (I have to tell him to though otherwise he'll spend the whole time playing!)