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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Keys dilemma- Instinct is to say no. AIBU?

26 replies

oakleaffy · 01/08/2023 20:34

Friend with dog has gone on holiday

I’m letting her dog out for wees and walked her .

Her adult son is working late til 23h

Her son has messaged me asking that I leave their spare house keys outside for his mate to let herself in.

I said I wasn’t happy doing this as a security risk.

I was pestered to leave them out, but unless I hear it’s ok from his parents, I’m not doing it.

I don’t understand why she can’t come over when son is here?

I feel pressured- but instinct says to not do it.
WWYD?

OP posts:
GoodChat · 01/08/2023 20:36

Definitely don't do it.
Tell him it'll invalidate their home insurance if anything goes wrong, and surely you need to keep hold of the keys to check on the dogs anyway?

Hoppinggreen · 01/08/2023 20:36

I agree.
I would not give anyone a neighbours key unless the neighbour who gave it to me told me to

CherryMaDeara · 01/08/2023 20:37

Definitely not. Be firm and tell him you will not do anything unless your friend texts you herself.

Original poster
oakleaffy · 01/08/2023 20:38

GoodChat · 01/08/2023 20:36

Definitely don't do it.
Tell him it'll invalidate their home insurance if anything goes wrong, and surely you need to keep hold of the keys to check on the dogs anyway?

I told him that, about invalidating any insurance.
I’m glad you agree.
He’s pestering me- but I’m hardening my resolve.
Cheeky to pester someone you don’t even know properly
It’s his parents house- not his.

OP posts:
liveforsummer · 01/08/2023 20:40

Does the son not even live there? Definitely not either way but even worse if it's not even his home. She can have his key if he wants her to have one that bad

LakeTiticaca · 01/08/2023 20:53

It's a no from me as well. His mate will have to wait for him to get home

VimFuego101 · 01/08/2023 20:54

Hoppinggreen · 01/08/2023 20:36

I agree.
I would not give anyone a neighbours key unless the neighbour who gave it to me told me to

Same. I'd be furious if I was the neighbour and you did this without checking with me.

Original poster
oakleaffy · 01/08/2023 20:58

Yes, son lives there.

I agree that the friend can wait til son gets home from work.
Dog has had an hour’s poo break in their garden so she should be ok til 11pm.

Burglars DO look for keys left outside- and they can just let themselves in.

I don’t want that responsibility.

I messaged the parents but they didn’t respond.

OP posts:
Original poster
oakleaffy · 01/08/2023 21:03

VimFuego101 · 01/08/2023 20:54

Same. I'd be furious if I was the neighbour and you did this without checking with me.

Show quote history

I’d be livid as well. Even my adult son when I phoned him said “No chance”.
Thanks everyone.
Her son is still messaging me but I’m not looking at messages.
Am almost at my house now, so too late anyway .

OP posts:
carly2803 · 01/08/2023 21:33

absolutely no way!

It isnt even his house! be different if his parents said "leave keys in x place for tom "

KrisAkabusi · 01/08/2023 21:54

Can you not text your friend?

Original poster
oakleaffy · 01/08/2023 22:50

KrisAkabusi · 01/08/2023 21:54

Can you not text your friend?

I have- but no response.

It’s not happening- I’m not leaving them out.

I was really pressured by the son to leave them out -saying it’ll be ok and “ we always leave keys outside “

If that was the case, why did friend especially get three separate keys cut for me and she showed me how to lock up.

Im not going to leave keys out for anyone to find. ( Their house is on a busy road- lots of passers by).

OP posts:
Siameasy · 01/08/2023 23:20

Son should’ve texted his rents and got them to message you if so.

RubyWedding · 01/08/2023 23:30

I guess the friend could come to you first and get the keys.... but the son sounds an unreliable chap, so I wouldn't want to lend the keys mainly because if you don't get them back, how will you fulfil your dog walking duties?

UnicornStarfish · 02/08/2023 00:13

Why didn't the son text the parents and ask them to text you? Why hasn't he done it yet?
So a stranger is going to be in the house all alone? What if something goes missing? Who takes the blame?

zooopta · 02/08/2023 00:44

You did the right thing

INeedAnotherName · 02/08/2023 00:47

If you had left the keys outside how would you have got in to walk the dog the next day?

The dog takes priority over him having sex.

Original poster
oakleaffy · 02/08/2023 13:35

INeedAnotherName · 02/08/2023 00:47

If you had left the keys outside how would you have got in to walk the dog the next day?

The dog takes priority over him having sex.

😂 EXACTLY!
There are supposedly a spare set of keys in the house that he wanted me to find and leave outside for his female friend.

Can you believe it, he was messaging me at almost midnight wanting me to go and leave keys!

I was in bed.

Had a message from parents this morning saying that he can give the keys to the friend in person.

The parents know her.

OP posts:
Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 02/08/2023 13:37

I’d be thinking hard about getting involved in their holidays again.

INeedAnotherName · 02/08/2023 14:14

Next time they ask you to dog sit say no thanks, you don't want to be dragged into the son's sex life drama ever again and you didn't appreciate the deluge of texts he sent.

That is utterly ridiculous. Midnight??

MinnieGirl · 02/08/2023 14:35

oakleaffy · 02/08/2023 13:35

😂 EXACTLY!
There are supposedly a spare set of keys in the house that he wanted me to find and leave outside for his female friend.

Can you believe it, he was messaging me at almost midnight wanting me to go and leave keys!

I was in bed.

Had a message from parents this morning saying that he can give the keys to the friend in person.

The parents know her.

Show quote history

I would be absolutely furious with anyone txting me at midnight unless it was a life or death emergency….
I would make it very clear to your friend that you found her sons behaviour unacceptable and won’t be helping again as a result.

Codlingmoths · 02/08/2023 14:45

Midnight?? Who does he think he is?

Beautiful3 · 02/08/2023 15:01

If she got burgled, it would be your fault. You were right to not do it. Even when she did reply, he can give it to her in person, that didn't mean leave them outside under a rock!!!

Lkahsvtv · 02/08/2023 15:06

I would agree that unless the homeowner says it’s ok then you shouldn’t do it. It’s not your problem to sort out this friend having keys

Clarinet1 · 02/08/2023 15:16

Glad the parents have told him what to do; No way Jose would I be leaving the keys to someone else’s home lying around!