To send my child to nursery during mat leave?

[Wflwer]

I have just been for dinner with my family while visiting home and mentioned that while on maternity leave I plan to send new baby to nursery one day a week (at about 12-16 weeks).
I was met with criticism about laziness and bonding etc however I’m on my own.
I live 200 miles away from any family I don’t have loads of friends and I’m not with the child’s father who doesn’t want to be involved but will be paying CM which I will use to pay for the day at nursery and also I live in a 1 bedroom flat which is quite literally 3 rooms of bedroom/living room/bathroom.
I have anxiety about completely losing myself in all of this with the lack of support around me and I just feel like a day to myself to clean the flat or just to go out and do something on my own would be nice.

aibu?

It's a good idea as it will give you both time to get used to being away from each other before baby is at nursery every day when you go back to work.
Ignore your family. They aren't in your canoe so they don't get a say in how it's paddled. Learn to have very deaf ears and teflon shoulders if you need them, and hopefully your family will settle down and let you get on with it.

I'm a childminder and I have taken teeny babies who's mums had to go straight back to work but one of my most memorable ones was a lady who came with a 3 month old, same age as my then dd (and I went back to minding within 6 days of her birth) and she was really struggling with PND. watching her walk away from her baby the first time was so eye opening - she looked so relieved and so free. I'd never judge someone leaving their child in proper childcare... it takes a strong person to say they want to do something unconventional.

If you feel you want to then do it.

You are the only one who can decide what is right.

Personally I would do two half day sessions but I get this doesn't fit with your plans. One nursery day for my child is 730-5 and I pay until 630. So I'd look at what hours you are paying for vs what you'll use. Say for example you'll do things from 130-6 there may be a money saving there depending on their sessions.

YANBU. Mine started in nursery at 12 weeks as I couldn't take any longer than this for mat leave. They still went to nursery if I had a day off mid-week as it gave me a chance to get admin done, rest and recharge. Had I been able to take a longer mat leave I'd still have needed that day to myself (and probably more so as looking after a baby FT is hard!)