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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - does my brother have cancer?

26 replies

monarchbutterfly · 30/07/2023 21:13

So sorry, but posting in AIBU for traffic,

My baby brother is 23. Fit and healthy, he’s been unwell for a few weeks, more so the last week. On and off fever, white as a ghost, nails beds almost yellow, loss of appetite, he’s lost a lot of weight over the last few months too but he’s been working long hours on his feet and doesn’t eat as much as he used to so kind of just put it down to that. My mum noticed a massive lump on the side of his neck a few days ago, and around 3/4 further smaller ones have come out in the last few days, along his collar bone and up his neck, his blood CRP results were 83 when he saw the GP 3 days ago about the lump, and he’s been back to a&e today because he’s been white as a sheet and the lumps have gotten bigger/more so in the last few days. His bloods have gone up again, a&e gave him a chest x-ray which was inconclusive - which to me means one thing, the doctor who saw him said she wants him to have a CT scan within the week and a biopsy with a needle on one of the lymph nodes this week? He also had the camera up his nose/down his throat because the lump is so large they weren’t sure whether it was affecting his oesophagus.

I’m pretty sure he has cancer doesn’t he? I’ve been on Google, I know you shouldn’t do that. A lot of signs point to non hodgkins lymphoma, anyone else been through this? Had a sibling with cancer maybe? Just so worried about him and what it could all mean for him

OP posts:
Zanatdy · 30/07/2023 21:16

Sorry OP, non Hodgkin’s lymphoma was what I was thinking too. Really hope it’s not

MissHoollie · 30/07/2023 21:18

I think other blood tests would give more of a clue pointing to cancer than CRP.
CRP is inflammation due to infection as I understand nothing to do with cancer. I could be wrong.
My first thought was glandular fever .

It's good they are being v thorough and hope all is ok and there's an easy solution

nocoolnamesleft · 30/07/2023 21:19

Lymphoma sounds like a possibility, but not the only one. For instance, has he been exposed to TB? Because that sounds like it would be another possibility.

lljkk · 30/07/2023 21:23

hmmm, this is what my google says:

On and off fever, white as a ghost, nails beds almost yellow

-> "sinusitis, thyroid problems, lymph accumulation, and rheumatoid arthritis"

massive lump on the side of his neck

-> "enlarged lymph nodes. These can be caused by bacterial or viral infections, cancer (malignancy), or other rare causes."

I won't say cancer isn't in the list, but it's one of .... EIGHT causes that fit the symptoms. Not including the "rare causes." Why do you ignore the other 7 things mentioned?

pecanpie101 · 30/07/2023 21:52

There are many other possibilities other than cancer.
Hope you find out what's wrong with your brother soon Flowers

Alesto · 30/07/2023 22:24

There are other things that could cause this. They are acting quickly, which is good. He may be on the '2 week pathway', which means that they will test within 2 weeks to eliminate or identify cancer. Try not to Google, it will only cause you more worry. This really is a time to try to remain positive and just wait.

Dinnerisburnt · 30/07/2023 23:32

To try and put your mind at some sort of ease and not wanting to stress you out, I had Hodgkins Lymphoma at the same age (30 years ago now), it usually affects young people, and has very classic symptoms if you do look into it. It also has a very high success rate for treatment, like 95%.

Not much anyone can do until the biopsy and CT scan.

I hope I haven’t caused you to worry more than you are already, there are many illnesses that cause lumps and they are not always cancer, it’s good the hospital are being thorough and your brother will get treatment accordingly. x

Original poster
monarchbutterfly · 08/08/2023 20:03

@lljkk

Diagnosed with hodgkins today. So I was right to not consider the 'other 7 things'

OP posts:
determinedtomakethiswork · 08/08/2023 20:05

I'm so sorry. I hope he gets really good treatment. 💐

NugsNotDrugs · 08/08/2023 20:08

Oh goodness! That must be so difficult. I hope his treatment starts soon and is successful.

EachandEveryone · 08/08/2023 20:09

Thats a shame but Im pleased it was quick so they can get started with treatment. My friends son has just had it at 25 and the treatment was six months from start to finish. I hope your brother has a smooth route as well. Good luck x

poetryandwine · 08/08/2023 20:09

OP,

I am very sorry to hear this. However as@Dinnerisburnt has said, treatment for Hodgkins has an excellent success rate. It won’t be fun but chances are very high that your beloved brother will come through this with his health essentially regained

SkipHopJumpSplatWallop · 08/08/2023 20:13

I’m so sorry to hear this, and wish your brother well.
I remember when the singer Delta Goodrem had it and she’s fine now. As others have said it has good success rates for treatment. I hope your brothers treatment is successful too.

lljkk · 08/08/2023 20:17

I hope you can be a huge support to your brother.

nocoolnamesleft · 08/08/2023 20:19

I am sorry to hear that. My brother and I have both supported each other through mutual cancer journeys. You can really help him by being a listening ear.

Sotired22 · 08/08/2023 20:24

@monarchbutterfly I’m sorry this is happening to your family. I understand how hard it is. Take time to process the news, the shock is horrible when something like this happens. I hope your brother can get started with treatment soon 💐

FarmGirl78 · 08/08/2023 20:57

monarchbutterfly · 08/08/2023 20:03

@lljkk

Diagnosed with hodgkins today. So I was right to not consider the 'other 7 things'

I'm very sorry to hear this news from your family.

However, while you were correct in your educated guess you were not necessarily right in not considering other possibilities. With hindsight there was no need, but these symptoms could well have also been other things. To consider other things would have not have been a wrong move. I say this to reassure others who may find this post further down the line and want realistic hope.

Silvers11 · 08/08/2023 20:59

@monarchbutterfly I am so sorry to hear this. It must be such a shock to your brother, yourself and all the family. Thinking of you all.

FarmGirl78 · 08/08/2023 21:01

Whoops, pressed send too soon!

As others have said, it now being an obviously devastating outcome, he has an EXCELLENT chance of getting through this. HL has really really good outcomes. He'll have a rocky path for a while, as will you all as a family but you'll be out the other side together xx

HotSince82 · 08/08/2023 21:03

Wishing your brother successful treatment and a speedy recovery.

And sending you a hug. You will get through this together now you know what you are dealing with x

thefirstmrsrochester · 08/08/2023 21:13

Oh OP, its such a shock but hodgkins lymphoma is very responsive to treatment. My DS (21) had his last chemo for stage 3 HL almost a year ago and as far as he is concerned, the cancer is a distant memory.

As your brother is 23, he may well receive his treatment in a teenage cancer trust unit, amazing places, so very different to adult cancer cancer wards, and the ingoing support is amazing.

DS went to out of hours thinking he had a rugby injury. Never in my life was i expecting a cancer diagnosis.

Anyway, all the very best to your brother for his treatment.

Much love to you all xxx

Dinnerisburnt · 08/08/2023 21:55

Really sorry to hear this. Wishing your brother well with his treatment x

SmirnoffIceIsNice · 08/08/2023 22:05

Sorry to hear about the diagnosis OP. My husband had NHL a few years ago. His lump was in the base of his tongue and affecting swallowing. He did have to go through chemo and radiotherapy, but it was successful. Please try to stay as positive as you can. I wish your brother well with his treatment 💐

neilyoungismyhero · 08/08/2023 22:17

MissHoollie · 30/07/2023 21:18

I think other blood tests would give more of a clue pointing to cancer than CRP.
CRP is inflammation due to infection as I understand nothing to do with cancer. I could be wrong.
My first thought was glandular fever .

It's good they are being v thorough and hope all is ok and there's an easy solution

I had a CRP reading of 197 it was all about inflammation. I had auto immune conditions.

familyissues12345 · 08/08/2023 22:34

So sorry Monarch, that's a shitty diagnosis Sad