So I'm becoming more and more convinced that my relationship is nearing/at its end but today has just taken the biscuit. Quick backstory: been together 10 years, 2 kids that are biologically mine but have only ever known him as dad (no contact with bio), over the past year we've both had major bereavements, he's been diagnosed with chronic health conditions so we're navigating both the medical investigations as well as the benefits system which seems determined to beat him down, and his mental health has gone through the floor. Lots of anger, depression, anxiety etc. I've been trying to hold everything together, have been the main breadwinner for pretty much the whole relationship and the only earner now, making sure the kids are OK and doing all of the family admin (schools, medicals, playdates, shopping etc) but it's really taken a toll on our relationship especially after my mum passed away and he just didnt/couldn't support me.
Today I left the kids to make egg mayo whilst I went for a lie down. They're 11 and 12, we regularly cook together and they're doing brilliantly at developing independence with food. I helped them time the eggs boiling and drain the hot water and left them at the point of peeling the eggs so they were safe. 20 mins later I heard shouting downstairs followed by the door slamming and then him driving off. Went straight down to see what had happened and they told me he'd gone off at them because they hadn't made him a sandwich! Bear in mind they hadn't actually made themselves any sandwiches either just the egg mayo and... they're the **ing children! Apparently this heinous failure on their part means that he's treated like shit in his own home and has driven him to start smoking again. He said this to the kids, so he's put all that on their shoulders over a blinking sandwich.
Also my son offered to make him breakfast but he declined. I really don't want him to come home!