Hello.
Im really struggling to process a situation that has happened to me and I'd really appreciate y your opinions as I have none to talk to about this.
I met a man in line in late May.
He had only just ended things with his partner of eighteen months.
Their relationship was acrimonious to say the least.
He said that there was jealousy on both sides and that the major issue in their relationship was that she would not give up her friendships with her exes. These exes were married men who continued to sext her and they continued to meet regularly.
Please bear in mind that these are his words.
We met up every week for walks, dinners, nights away , activities.
He was affectionate , decent , funny and seemed a solid and nice guy.
We're late forties , busy and full lives so this suited us .
Through all of this his ex was ringing and texting. She was very upset and then became nasty so he blocked her.
He told me all of this when I asked.
He felt massive guilt for ending it with her as she has a lot of problems and wanted them to move in together but he was 100% sure it was over for them.
He didn't want this.
They are both divorced .
A few weeks ago I had two days free where I could see him before I left for a week working overseas.
He couldn't commit to meeting that week due to work so I didn't ask again. We didn't meet.
We spoke every day in the phone and texted throughout the days .
His ex contacted him on a another phone asking him to do favours for her as she wasn't in a position to do them herself.
He did that and they were back in contact talking and reminiscing.He felt awful but determined that the relationship is fully over .
I felt quite disrespected that he was telling me this and basically said that in my world, exes belong in the past as they just create trust issues.
He said that he couldn't just stop contact, that she was in a very bad place and he felt awful.
He chose to stay in contact with her until things settled down. So I chose to leave the table so to speak.
We spoke and decided that when things settle down we may meet again and see where we are both at .
He has a stressful life with big family responsibilities , health issues and coupled with finishing a toxic relationship is in no position to start something. Neither am I .
But I'm bemused and confused here.
I seem to be able to see the wood for the trees.
What are your thoughts on what happened here?