Please can you tell me about your achievements later in life?

[CuriousLadyBird]

Hi all,

I'm having a weird crisis and I'm annoyed at myself when I should be overjoyed.

I've been accepted onto a registered mental health nursing course which is an amazing opportunity and I'm so grateful but I can't help thinking I'm too old which is ridiculous.

I'm 28 and a mum of 2. I feel behind my peers because I couldn't go to university when my friends did as my dad was elderly and my mum is autistic/learning difficulties so I've been working since I was 17. I've worked retail, call centre, admin etc all at NMW and there's nothing wrong with that but I've always wanted to work within the healthcare sector.

Once I was out of the house I did apply to university but then covid hit and I got pregnant, then my dad died, my mum needed a lot more care, I got MH issues and somehow another baby appeared so It had to take a bit of a backseat and it feels like years have passed me by and I'm in a similar position.

I just keep thinking oh I'll be 32 when I qualify, what's the point etc but I know that's like silly thoughts because I'm gonna be 32 anyway so I might as well be a 32 year old nurse but the thoughts just won't leave.

So please can people kindly share their achievements that were a little bit later on and how it feels, how it's going etc just for a bit of encouragement.

Thank you

I am on a LD nursing course at the moment. We work quite closely with the MH group as there is a lot of overlap in our services and training.
There are no 18 or 19 year old starters on either course, the youngest peson started at 20 and she is the only one, I started at 21 and am the second youngest person. The average age for people doing either of the degrees currently at my uni is around 30. The oldest on my course is 53, in MH I think its 47 Over half of the women on my course are mums- their kids range in age from 23 to 2.

Although you might feel later in life to be doing uni, for the course you have chosen you are not at all. Everone who has gotten through to 3rd year had life experience of the area before starting. This is not an area people seem to fall into on a whim, it seems to come from personal, generally family, experience. And having that sort of upbringing is complicated and although it makes us more empathatic and generally better practitioners than if we didn't have that sort of life- it does mean our opportunities to go to uni are later than lots of other people.
There will be people like you on your course- I have found it so helpful to be somewhere that people really understand what its like. And its so rewarding to learn to support people that include families that look like your own.

I changed careers and entered an incredibly competitive line of work a few years ago in my early 40’s. Might be outing if I said exactly what it is, but it’s a very tough world where rejection is rife and youth can, to a certain extent, be prized.

A years on and I’m doing well. Colleagues often say they value that I’m not in my early 20s! I sometimes wish I’d started sooner but we all have our own paths in life. 28 is honestly nothing - you have masses of time OP xx

I was coming on to tell you some of the things I've achieved in my 60s. Then I saw your age. Speechless.

My sister has gone back to uni in her mid 30s and is now 2/3 of the way through a nursing degree. She had similar worries to you, but absolutely doesn't feel out of place on her course and is really enjoying learning and working towards such a worthwhile career.

I got my PhD in my mid 30s, with two small children in tow. I'm very proud of the achievement, even if it hasn't lead to a glittering career! It has, however, made it easier for me to find work again after a career break for my caring responsibilities. I have been able to get back into an interesting, flexible, decently paid job after a few years of being a sahp - which I would have struggled to do without my qualification.

You are young, you sound like you're full of potential. Don't limit yourself.

If I've offended anyone with the title then I apologise. I do mention in my OP and a follow up post what I meant.

I'm not currently working at the moment. As mentioned in my OP my mums care needs increased, my toddler has SEN and I have a baby but my course doesn't start until next year and we finally have carers in for my mum, my toddler is thriving at nursery and the baby will be a bit older and ready to start nursery. I have applied for a couple of PT support worker/HCA jobs to try and gain some experience before starting so hoping to hear from them (for the PP who asked).

Thank you to everyone sharing their stories, it's so inspiring and amazing to hear.

I guess sometimes you just feel like life's passing you by no matter how old you are.

One of my former doctoral students turned 64 two days before his viva.

I qualified as a RMN at 32 ☺️ it's a nice age patients dont worry so much that you have no life experience. In my first year a patient literally asked how old I was before agreeing to me accompanying on a visit because they wanted to know that I wasn't a young person! Also it's a great career well done and good luck with your studies keep being human at the heart of what you do and you will make great changes alongside people.

I believe our number one goal in life should be to spend every day doing things you love. End of. With that in mind, you can start a new career or change career at any age as long as you’re doing something you love. If you GET TO do this, then you’re unbelievably lucky.

The women in my family all did degrees way later than average. My mum did a social work degree in her 50s and worked for 12 years after. My 2 sisters were in their 30s.

I've never been to uni or even 6th form. Did my maths and English gcses aged 40. In my 50s, I'm well established with the company I've been with for 6 years and am now on the third rung of the ladder.

28 and 32 are no age at all. When you qualify, you'll have nearly 50 years of working life ahead of you.

I think you know you’re not too old, but I do understand where you’re coming from. I remember thinking, when I considered doing a PGCE, that I would be 28 by the time I qualified. My dad actually said to me, I’ll be 28 anyway, might as well be 28 and a teacher. I then finished my MSc at 40.

As you get older you’ll meet so many people studying at different times in their lives. I work as an SEN teacher at the moment. There are a few support staff older than me who are training in different areas.

I’m 46 and still working out what I want to do in life. Go for it!

I did a PhD in my 30s and my sister did a three year degree to change careers in her 40s.

I guess you can go for it at ten years later than your peers or...not. I know where I'd rather be in 5 years.

Having said that, you've faced a lot of adversity. I think this will make you more committed to your course and an even better practitioner. Good luck.

I thought you were going to say 50’s. Come on 32 is nothing, seriously when you’re approaching 50 you’ll laugh at thinking 32 is later in life! Go for it

I qualified as a psychotherapist a few months short of my 50th. You have bags of time and likely more than one career ahead of you. Go for it!

I got my accountancy qualification which is an NVQ 4 when I was 29. I now run my own business working from home full time. It was a 3 year day release course and I had to study a lot in the evenings around working full time.

I wasn't encouraged to go to college or uni and did a YTS in a bank, which should have lead to a job for life, but it didn't work out that way. I fell into accountancy in a local office, realised that is what I was good at and when my boss offered to put me through the AAT I jumped at it.

I think that your age is perfect to do what you are doing.

I’m starting a graduate scheme next year at 30! Even people who did go to uni at 18 often change their mind career wise and go and do something else in their 30s or later- about 5 of my friends qualified as teachers in our early 20s and only one is still teaching now

Take inspiration and go for it like Blondie is OP. You are not too old and goodness knows the NHS needs more people recruited.

1. You are not ‘later in life’.

2. It’s really common for nursing to be a second or third career and so people tend to get their degrees later than your average graduate.

3. Life experience is INCREDIBLY valuable in nursing, don’t underestimate what you’ve already gained and will build on with your training.

Best of luck.

Left school with no qualifications. Decided at 33 that I wanted to work in an area that needed a degree. Achieved my BSc at 32 and a masters at 38. This was with having two small children and needing a hip replacement at 36! You can do this

I'm doing a degree in.my fifties purely for my own interest.

Looking back to 18 year old me, I KNOW I work harder now than I would have then!

You've got this 👍

My mum became a mental health nurse at 39, and a CPN two years later.

I did a degree and graduated at 44. My oldest pal there was 70.

I started a new career in my early 30s. Everyone else was straight out of university. I spent a lot of time thinking I'd never take everything in as quickly as they did, but after a while I realised that they didn't have the life experience to see all the potential issues that I could see. Trust yourself, you'll be fine and you may even be at an advantage.

@CuriousLadyBird - I worked in a job supporting student nurses on clinical placements until fairly recently. I would say at least 50% of student nurses were not school leavers, especially those doing mental health nursing.

Lots of young women in particular miss out on going to university for various reasons but bring a wealth of life experience to the role. One of the best students I ever supported was a woman of 35 who was a single parent of 3 DC, one of whom who had a serious health condition - this student aced all her coursework and clinical placements and got the best dissertation that year.

so you can absolutely do this! One of the major problems for those with DC is childcare when on placements which might be 12 hour shifts/weekends/nights/early starts and quite a distance from home. If you have that sorted, then there’s literally nothing stopping you! Good luck!

I went to uni at 19, but 50% of my class was over 35 due to the course I did

I then went back at 31 to do my masters. This was a really mixed age group from 22 up to 60ish

And I intend to go back at 42 ish to do my PHD, in a few years time

Seriously, you should be incredibly proud of yourself for doing it, don't let anything put you off :)

Oh hey!! Just here
to say I qualified as a registered mental health nurse at 31 - it was hard going obviously but honestly so worth it and now I love my job, I’m on a better salary than I was in my old job and there’s lots of room for progression and flexible working.
My uni was supportive and there were so many others on the course who were in their 30s, 40s and even 50s!
Good luck, in your studies - it’s a brilliant career!

I just qualified as a Breastfeeding Counsellor at 40 with NCT and University of Worcester and have decided to continue studying with them as I’ve really enjoyed it. Complete career change for me.