To ask if you regret divorcing / splitting from the parent of your dc?

[Honeycombspin]

We have two dc and I’ve been back and forth on this for about 14 years!
it’s never been quite bad enough - and still now maybe it isn’t. I’m not happy and never have been but I’m not hopelessly unhappy either?
I saw a thread in relationships about the best thing about women’s husbands / partners and it just kind of got me because although DH is a good man, we’ve both changed and not really together.
The best thing about DH is he is dad to the dc. That is pretty significant.
The worst thing is our sex life is dead in the water and he just doesn’t get me - nor I him I suppose. He doesn’t really understand me or make any attempt to. He tends to just get angry if things don’t go his way.

The grass isn’t greener though and I am aware of this.

Did anyone regret it? Especially if they had dc?

don't regret it for a single second

I sometimes regret it a bit because everything is still shit, just in a different way. He still controls most of my life by refusing to have the kids regularly and withholding maintenance, I’m a lot worse off financially and that affects the kids a lot.

I do really enjoy getting a bit if a break from the kids if he has them for a weekend because I’d never had time away from them before and they are really hard work.. I’m too skint to do anything particularly exciting with my time though

Sounds like the kind of situation I was in, but I was pretty much parenting alone.

I don't regret it for one minute - it's been the making of me confidence and career wise and the kids are settled and happy.

Not in the slightest.
My ex was/is a compulsive liar who wanted to prove me right after we separated by harassing and stalking me 🤦‍♀️

I know that's not your situation though.

Absolutely not. I was 💯 sure and still am 17 years on

No...I don't regret it.

My kids have blossomed.

I don't get any CM because I live where I'd need a couple thousand just to take him to court to apply for it,which I just don't have paying everything.

He's the stereotypical Disney Dad that swoops in every week or so..But I feel my kids are happier,I feel grounded and I'm doing much better at work.

He was a bit useless. Not abusive. Not great either though. He’d typically have her for a day or so a week (I went back to work early) and eventually he actually moved to the USA (randomly, no links there!) and then got married and had twins. Then contact became half the summer holidays, he’d come and get her (and visit his parents here at the same time) and fly back with her, and then again at the end. But over time it became apparent dd is very much like me, introverted, left wing, quiet etc and he’s the exact opposite and the cracks started to show. She’s now 20 and in her second year of university and they message from time to time but they’re not close.

Yes and no

No because he cheated on me but yes because there was never anyone else for me and I miss him every day.

^ same here

It very much depends how old the kids are, it absolutely destroyed my 12-year-old she still not right now. Just about getting my act together enough to support her through college and university but the problem was I was such a mess because of his actions I couldn’t help her. She tried to jump off a roof At one point that’s not a cry for help that’s I want to die.

if you can grit your teeth until they go to uni, I would.

No regret, just relief. Fourteen years on, he’s now married to someone else who he treats like shit. He is a living reminder that I did the right thing.