Aibu to be quite annoyed about this?

[Perspectiveplease1]

I’m asking in AIBU for some perspective as I might be getting annoyed about this unnecessarily. As a disclaimer, I am fat and know I need to lose weight, it’s a work in progress!

I received some gifts recently as a thank you for some work I had done. This included flowers and some chocolate.

Some I put up to enjoy later in the year/take to a family gathering, and a couple of items that I like, I planned to eat.

I had already given some to family member (their fave chocolate) and had kept a second bar of the same chocolate out to enjoy myself. I had been enjoying a line of it each day.

when I got home the other day I noticed there was some missing and said family member told me they had had to eat it to save me from myself.

This really annoyed me.

I hadn’t been binging it and was looking forward to my little bit each day. I know they want me to lose weight (they mention it daily!) but as an adult in my mid 30s I am more than capable of making my own decisions.

Would this annoy you too?

Yes it would annoy me
what a nerve they have
enjoy your chocolate OP

YANBU- very annoying, in particularly their response. Anything in the cupboard is fair game though in our house and if I wanted to keep something for myself I'd put it elsewhere.

Monumentally cheeky. YANBU.

I would be hurt and upset and annoyed, yes! So sorry this happened to you.
It seems especially mean when you had been having a small amount each day, but tbh that's pretty irrelevant because it wasn't any of their business.

Are you tempted to speak to them about it? You could consider asserting some boundaries i.e. you don't want any comments about your weight or to have anyone touching your food etc.

It is both rude and cruel.

It out of order to say that to someone. They shouldn’t have.
But, I grew up with an obese parent who just wouldn’t stop. They had heart problems and other things but still, had to watch them drink their wine and have “just a little bit of chocolate each night.”
Basically, I had to watch them eat themselves into health problems and watch them be too tired to do things, get out of breath easily etc. It really isn’t nice for the people who love you and have to watch you self harm like that, because that’s what it is. And it was never “just a little bit of chocolate”. There was all the stuff they ate during the day which was always badly chosen, and then the little treat at the end of the day. It’s hard to watch so if this was a child or a husband who took the chocolate then I can see how they feel. But they shouldn’t have done it, because at the end of the day, it’s your choice.

I would have assumed they just wanted to eat it and just came up with a stupid/light hearted excuse rather than they actually thought I needed my food intake policing.

They’d not be getting anything else from me.

Hide the remaining chocolate.

This is about more than the chocolate. You live with someone who mentions your weight every day?! That is awful.

They've the behaved badly (nicking your chocolate) and then tried to make you feel shit about it by insinuating that you would binge the lot.

I would be seriously reconsidering my relationship with this family member.

Surely they are joking though?! Still bad to eat your gifted choc, but I would take that as a jokey phrase when someone REALLY wants some chocolate and ask them to buy me some more when they’re next out.

I should probably let it be known that I’ve eaten someone else’s chocolate - I do replace it though.

What a dick move. I'd be furious.

How condescending and disrespectful.

Tell them to replace your chocolate and not to be such a fuckwit in the future.

I understand being concerned about a loved ones weight (im concerned about my husband's right now) but mentioning it on a daily basis just sounds abusive.

This translates to : I ate it because I'm a greedy thoughtless person.

Tell them to replace it. It wasn't their gift to decide upon.

Yanbu, hide the rest of the bar. Cheeky gits!

It sounds to me like they ate the chocolate, felt guilty about it, and then tried to laugh it off by making a joke about it. I'm not sure I'd interpret it as them getting in a dig at your weight or eating habits, more as a comment on their own lack of willpower - a bit like when people say 'Well, it would be rude not to, haha' when they're offered something they want but they know they shouldn't be having. So the 'I had to eat them to save you from yourself' line was probably a clumsy joke. However, they shouldn't have bloody well eaten your chocolates in the first place - and I suspect they know that, and their shit joke was to cover up their own embarrassment.

So while i don't think they were being malicious I do think they're a twat.

Saving chocolate to “enjoy” each day is really unhealthy
Completely disagree. Surely eating it in moderation is exactly the right thing to do?

You live with someone who mentions your weight every day?! That is awful
This is the problem. Most people would support someone struggling with weight issues, not criticise and undermine.

What the fuck. There is nothing 'covetous' about pacing yourself and eating a line of chocolate a day. That is eating in moderation.

Yes. It would annoy me as it’s someone knowingly eating something that was a gift to me. It would also annoy me as my weight is not their business to comment on.

Looking forward to a little bit from a bar of chocolate each night that you're not planning to replace is not coveting it.

OP has done well to give most if it way.

To be honest, you sound like your attitude to food is a lot more dysfunctional than the OP's.

It is totally normal and perfectly healthy. You, however, are neither of those things if you think it's a problem to look forward to enjoying a small portion of a food that tastes nice.

She's having a few squares a day. That is eating it in moderation. By saving it rather than eating it all in one go, she's being moderate and restrained. She's not binge-eating.

You sound like you hang out on pro-ana boards. Go and deal with your own food issues before attacking other people's.