Okay, so my partner has always told 'white lies' as he calls them. The trust was gone several years ago but we have a 6 year old and while we still get along fine together we have carried on living together for the sake of our child. Every time I find out hes lied about something else i get mad for a few days and then get over it and life resumes as normal and we get along together fine. Mainly I choose to get over it because i hate the thought of not seeing my child every day. Its basically a constant cycle.
So anyway, to the most recent lie. Basically we both vaped a bit last year but we decided to quit as bills went up and we were struggling money wise. This was last december. We have carried on struggling all this year with money and ive just found out that he apparently "did quit" but then started back up doing it at work and has no idea why. Weve just been away for 2 weeks and now im wondering if he was doing it behind my back the whole time? Anyway he insisted yesterday it was just one vape but long story short he showed me his bank account and he has been getting into debt to buy vapes to smoke with his mates at work. His mum has recently had to give him a large sum of money to bail him out! All the while we are still struggling with money and while im giving things up that i enjoy doing and working extra hours, hes at the shop every day buying multiple vapes! Must also add when we vaped together last year he would smoke one vape within a few hours- if one would last a few days i dont think i would be so bothered but it looks likes hes going through 2 a day!
Sorry its such a long post, with all his past lies it just feels like one lie too many and i feel like im absolutely done with him. Theres no relationship to recover and i dont want to be unhappy like this forever, but i dont want to not see my child every day. We also have a mortgage together, which i put the deposit down for. If we sell the house I will get my deposit back but i work part time with unreliable overtime and wouldnt be able to afford to buy my own property alone- so i would have to rent but i wouldnt be entitled to any help as id have more than 6000 savings- id then have to use all that money to live off as my wages alone wouldnt cover bills meaning in a few years when my child is older and i could possibly get a full time job, all my deposit money will be gone! So i'll never have a chance to own my own house again either. I feel so stuck.
Am i being dramatic and unreasonable? Its not the vaping as such- its the money issues and the lies. If we split up and sold the house he would go straight back to his loving parents, but i have no where to go other than an extortionate rental 😔