Would you leave your 2 yr old with a teenage (school age) babysitter you'd never met?

[ForestGoblin]

More an is it unreasonable than aibu.

Or would you want to meet the person at least once?

Said 2 yr old hasn't stayed with a non family member before.

I use babysitters - usually older teens or young adults. We’ve no family nearby. Generally I pay them first to come to the house and spend time with me and the kids (aged 3&2) before booking an evening. Ideally a few days later (but not always due to need). I make sure the kids are fed and in pj’s and then watch tv or play, they do bed.

Honestly the judgement here surprises me. There is no alternative. DH often works away, sometimes the evenings cover my work, and sometimes time with friends/catch up date nights. As a couple they’ve been important for us.

Agency's exist in my area - but (and this maybe a cultural difference thing) they are frequently teachers or other professionals and request a higher wage (I pay £12 ish an hour) and have limited availability.

It works for us. However no-one should feel under pressure to do something if they are uncomfortable.

No! I have been out I. A situation like this before when I took my toddler DD to stay with a friend for a few days and she had organised a teenage boy she knew but I’d never met to look after our kids so we could go out. I had to tell her it definitely wasn’t happening, my dd had never been left with anyone before and I certainly wasn’t going to leave her with a teenager we’d never met. it made the rest of the stay quite awkward to honest!

I hope you have spoken up to support this family member who is coming under pressure.

God yes I'm the family loudmouth on injustices. There's no reason she can't just stay with her kid and she really likes being with him so I don't think she'd even benefit from the wooft and relax for a bit effect.

No. Not in a million years...

Absolutely not! Safety issues aside, how scared will that child be being left with a complete stranger? I don't have any help so I simply never leave my kids, they come first!

Nope.
teenager they and I knew, and who I felt was responsible and trustworthy etc then yes.
teen I don’t know and my dc doesn’t know, absolutely not.

No way.

I wouldn’t leave a teenage baby sitter with a 2 year old full stop.
just get a sitters baby sitter.

No. I wouldn't leave my 11 year old with someone I'd never met, let alone a 2 year old.

Absolutely never!

No of course not!

Absolutely

No way on Earth.

The likelihood that any harm will come to your child is minimal, I used to babysit at that age

Absolutely not. Whoever it is pressuring the mum into doing this need to be told to jog on. I’ve had lots of scenarios where I’ve needed childcare over the years- leaving any of my kids with a teenager I barely know has never crossed my mind, nevermind a 2 year old.

I use a couple of teenage babysitters - children of friends - but my kids know them. First time they came and played with me too, then had the kids for an hour or so at home while I worked. Now one comes so I can go to gym which is a 4 minutes walk from the house (so I can get back quickly) and I keep my phone on. Will use them if I need to work from home, take one child to docs around corner for example, or just to give them each some one to one. Wouldn’t use if I was more than 5 mins walk away. But teens can be good sitters with sensible parameters.

No

No. Only left DD with my mum, MIL or nursery when she wasn’t with me or DH

If the Mum is a new mum or a youngish mum I would try and give her the courage to say. I am comfortable with that and I will only leave my child with people I am comfortable with.

This is really important, Mums gut instinct must be respected and she should be encouraged to listen to it.

*not comfortable

No