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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wedding AIBU

20 replies

JaceLancs · 22/07/2023 22:08

If you were a guest and had been offered 2 nights free accommodation as part of the package how much would you give to the happy couple? No cheesy poems or wedding lists were issued
when asked one half of the happy couple just said we want you to be there!

I am thinking £200plus my DP disagrees

OP posts:
BeeBelle16 · 22/07/2023 22:08

£150

Bayleaf25 · 22/07/2023 22:21

£100 (surely it’s still about what you can afford?)

loobylou10 · 22/07/2023 22:22

£200

TeriblePerson · 22/07/2023 22:23

Depends on going rate in your circle and you relationship and your income

Seasideanticscanleadtosandybuckets · 22/07/2023 22:23

100 quid is ample..

DeedlessIndeed · 22/07/2023 22:25

I've only gone over £200 for closest friends / family.

If it's a friend then £200 will be enough IMO, it's their choice to provide accommodation. But I suppose that depends on your circle.

UsingChangeofName · 22/07/2023 22:26

Totally depends on your budget.

To me £200 is a MASSIVE amount.
I think £100 would be a generous gift from a couple.
But on the other thread, I am with the vast majority who thinks that £65K is a high salary.
If you are both 3 figure earners, then you probably think differently from us ordinary mortals.

Shoxfordian · 22/07/2023 22:26

How much does your dp want to give? I’d prefer to buy a present than offer cash

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 22/07/2023 22:27

£50

YerAWizardHarry · 22/07/2023 22:27

£100 is more than enough! Imagine they have 100 guests attending, each bringing £100 each, that’s £10K! Remember it’s their own choice to host a wedding and their own choice to offer accommodation…

Echio · 22/07/2023 22:29

A few years ago a v close friend got married in tiny wedding of 10 people. Her parents paid for us all to stay in the hotel for three nights. I sent her parents some flowers afterwards and I'm ashamed to say the couple got nothing! We're still great friends tho! (they were going to do a bigger party later where they said they'd do a list... just never happened as she got instantly preggers and life took over!)

If it were me I'd prob inclined to do 'normal level + 50%' - they've been generous with the rooms but no need to repay to that level, but to acknowledge their generosity, go a little over the usual?

catscalledbeanz · 22/07/2023 22:30

I think I live in a different world as £200 would break me! I think £50 is very generous, regardless of the wedding or venue etc. surely they invite/ price to their budget and it's not about making an equal return? Perhaps I'm a dreadful guest and should refuse all invites in future as usually my gift is around the £20-30 mark and £50 if I can afford it.

burnoutbabe · 22/07/2023 22:30

Would you have booked 2 nights if paying yourself and what would that have cost you?m
I'd probably bump up my usual £50 to £100 in this instance.

GoodChat · 22/07/2023 22:33

£200 is a lot if you're also paying to travel, outfits, drinks, meals for everything except the wedding breakfast plus both using annual leave

noglow · 22/07/2023 22:34

£50 per person

DannyLaRuesBestFrock · 22/07/2023 22:35

I would give £100

WasJuliaRight · 22/07/2023 22:46

A toaster.

Edinvillian · 22/07/2023 23:03

I'd say £200. We've to pay £150 for the hotel for one night for my nephews wedding so would've been happy with two free nights 😁

NeverThatSerious · 22/07/2023 23:06

£100. If they want to splash out and spend a fortune on their wedding, that’s their call but I wouldn’t feel I needed to pay for that via their gift.

decaffonlypls · 22/07/2023 23:19

Close family/best friends £100-150
Extended family/friends £50-100
Evening only £20/30

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