Courtesy in the workplace

[foreverhopeful2000]

Hi all,
Leaving a job soon after 2 years in less than a week. Don't expect red carpet treatment, but spent more time with colleagues than family every week doing shift work in another part of London which isn't exactly 'next door' and this includes late back to back evenings and weekends. I ran one of the buildings where I worked by myself for months. The wider team I work in is made up of three nice managers. However with less than a week to go, it's been emotional as it's been a bit toxic between people - and also had to deal with someone stirring it up. Anyway, just happened to mention I was leaving to one manager (whilst thanking him and his team for being great) and he said 'oh, I didn't know you are going!) He sits practically next to my own manager. My husband says don't waste your time thinking you are going to get a card off these people. There's no collection, flowers, party, announcement of any kind or anything so far to indicate they will show some appreciation not just to me but others leaving the same time. I am miffed because other colleagues get massive baby shower donations (which I've paid into) and others get happy hour and a handmade birthday card. Do you think it's unreasonable to expect a £1 card from people? Most colleagues have disappeared on holiday so it feels like 'see you in the next life.'

After 2 years I wouldn’t expect much. Is there a high turnover of staff?

Some have been there 25 years. However, some left ages ago that I worked with who were hardworking and nice - but did several months - and got a card. I have a few days left in the job and want to be polite and professional but feel really upset about the blatant lack of indifference.

Well you mentioned you worked solo for many months, this could have had an impact.
I guess it also depends how you interact with your colleagues…are you a social butterfly or do you quietly get on with your job?
sometimes it just happens that there’s one person in the office who organises those things and maybe they aren’t aware/have left.
try not to take it to heart. Two years is not a particularly long time in a position to get a send off.
you can still be polite and professional, send an email before you leave thanking your colleagues for their support and that you’re moving on…here’s my contact details/LinkedIn etc…you’ll probably be surprised how many people will wish you well.

Thanks bluesheeps. The wider team earn about £1 million between them (it's a large floor with inner london weighting) and it just amazes me that people don't feel bad or embarrassed about it. I just will learn not to be so generous with work donations and cards in future.

wouldn't bother me.
most people don't care about other people at work, why would they, they are not chosen associates.
it's not as if it's an on-going problem you have there; you are leaving, so that's good.
i think you need to toughen up a bit/be more realistic.
you don't go to work for a social life.
just do your job and lead your personal life at home.
good luck.

Don't treat it like a popularity contest. You're leaving. Forget them and move on.

Usually when there's an organiser of these things they are both that kind of person and, more importantly, a friend of the celebrator/leaver. It only takes one person to lead and others follows. If that one person is missing in your case, that's the issue. It doesn't say anything about the wider team. They are probably equally interested or indifferent as they would be for anyone else.

I've been there OP and disagree with the previous poster who said 'you've only been there 2yrs!'. Years ago I did agency work and got more thanks and acknowledgement when the role finished after only 3mths compared to roles I was permanent in for 5+yrs!

You might find colleagues do something nice. I've found toxic management were awful and at one place- didn't even say goodbye and actively ignored and avoided me! That was when I needed to resign to care for a close relative that was dying!

Rise above it, move on and your life will improve. You will look back at that time and think 'what the actual!'

Best of luck op- but things WILL improve. x

You are right. I left because I hated it there. Always listen to intuition. Would have been miserable there if I had stayed any longer.

@CC4712 im not saying it like it doesn’t happen after a short time! I just mean on the whole it’s the lifetime employee leaving who might have fuss made.
@foreverhopeful2000 I imagine it’s just because the “office organiser “ isn’t involved. You don’t have to make a decision to never contribute again especially if you value these things….maybe you can make someone’s day in the future.

So you hate the place (although OP makes it sound like you don't) and you worked in an office alone for a long time?

It's not that surprising.

And it's not your last day yet so you never know

I worked at the same place for 27 years & left due to ill health, despite putting money in every collection for those years, I didn't even get a get well card or a collection. My manager didn't even say goodbye on the day I called to hand in my security pass & collect my belongings, it was like I was invisible.

Two years? My slippers have lasted longer than that. It’s not a long time in a job. And if you hate it they probably sense some of that in you and it may come across on how you engage in the workplace. Move on.