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AIBU?

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Original poster

Kids constantly knocking on door!!

110 replies

babyoda · 18/07/2023 23:27

I’m a little embarrassed to write this but for the last couple of months (since the evenings have been lighter) the kids that live on my estate keep on knocking on my door. It started as every now and then, then once a week, then a couple of times a week, then every day and some days it’s even 2/3 times. I never answer the door because they just knock and run and I think if you react, it makes them want to do it more?

They aren’t doing it to anyone else and I’m wondering if they’re doing it to me either because I’m a young woman who lives alone (my husband died in December 2021) or maybe because I’m young they’ll think I find it funny? I don’t really know what to do about it, I’m just dreading the 6 weeks holiday when they are at home all day.

I don’t know if it’s worth speaking to the parents as one of them literally watches her child knock on my door from her window. I have a ring doorbell (and cameras) so I have it all on video.

I hate confrontation and making a big deal out of something. I also worry that the mum might take it the wrong way and then spark off something even bigger. I just want to be left alone. I feel like it wouldn’t be happening if my husband was still here.

I keep spending time at my parents house because they are driving me mad and then I think maybe I’ll just rent the house out? But I love my house, it has so many memories for me and my husband.

I think they are of primary school age, can’t be totally sure on their exact age but they def aren’t teenagers.

Any advice please?

OP posts:
Original poster
babyoda · 18/07/2023 23:34

Just to add I don’t really have a front garden so I don’t have a fence etc. I do have steps leading up to my house which has some railings around it so I was thinking maybe to get a gate? Or do you think this would just encourage them to do it more

OP posts:
MucozadeOnLucozade · 18/07/2023 23:37

I'm really sorry to read this, must be so annoying. I'm not really sure what the answer is, but a gate might help as you say.

joyfulten · 18/07/2023 23:52

A gate, or could you post anonymously on the community group

IHateLegDay · 18/07/2023 23:56

Booby traps everywhere! Home Alone style 😁

Skyisbluegrassisgreen · 19/07/2023 00:00

Squirt them with a hose or bucket of water out of a window.

Annaishere · 19/07/2023 00:03

I hate kids like this. They haven’t been taught normal boundaries by their parents so I can’t see the parents caring

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 19/07/2023 00:15

Annaishere · 19/07/2023 00:03

I hate kids like this. They haven’t been taught normal boundaries by their parents so I can’t see the parents caring

Agree.

Are they old enough to read a warning sign?

LordSalem · 19/07/2023 00:33

Don’t know how you're putting up with this. Have you ever answered? Tbh I'd be flinging the door open immediately and shouting. I'd sit in front of the door so they don't dare do it again. After that then knocking on the parents door and asking them what the fuck their kids are playing at. You can only ignore for so long, then you're enabling their behaviour. If it's who can kick off the loudest then stand your ground and continue to defend it. These little fuckers and their breeders only understand when they're not getting away with it any more. I also hate confrontation but there's no way you can let little kids get away with this bullshit. Hopefully you'll be the scary lady who takes no shit.

Annaishere · 19/07/2023 00:37

I actually think this is grounds for a police complaint

Annaishere · 19/07/2023 00:37

Council as well if you think they’re council tenants

Pawpatrolsucks · 19/07/2023 00:42

I would talk to the parents. If they keep doing it knock on their door at 5am to complain.

Coolblur · 19/07/2023 01:00

Open the door and tell the kids to cut it out. If that doesn't work, talk to the parents. Don't be making any official complaints until you've tried everything else. Too often people are quick to escalate to the authorities as a way to avoid having to deal with the issue themselves. Fine if there's an actual danger, but that doesn't apply here. Besides, they'll ask you what you've tried already.
Anonymous FB posts won't work as no one will think it's their kids, and you can't go posting pictures of them, that goes down very badly.

Kids do naughty things they think are funny. Not all are hooligans in the making who've been dragged up by terrible parents. But this sort of ongoing bad behaviour is not on. You'll hopefully find a word with the parents sorts it.

FrostieBoabby · 19/07/2023 01:07

This is the the wrong time of year with it being school holidays but our local primary school put up a FB post to say they had complaints from local residents about kids playing knock door run and asked if parents could have a word with their kids, if you're near the school the kids go to it might be worth contacting them.

Could you put up a CCTV sign on the door as that might put them off if they know they're being recorded.

Failing that hopefully they'll get bored as you're not reacting to them, little horrors that they are!

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 19/07/2023 04:18

Coolblur · 19/07/2023 01:00

Open the door and tell the kids to cut it out. If that doesn't work, talk to the parents. Don't be making any official complaints until you've tried everything else. Too often people are quick to escalate to the authorities as a way to avoid having to deal with the issue themselves. Fine if there's an actual danger, but that doesn't apply here. Besides, they'll ask you what you've tried already.
Anonymous FB posts won't work as no one will think it's their kids, and you can't go posting pictures of them, that goes down very badly.

Kids do naughty things they think are funny. Not all are hooligans in the making who've been dragged up by terrible parents. But this sort of ongoing bad behaviour is not on. You'll hopefully find a word with the parents sorts it.

I don't want to deal with assholes. That's why "the authorities" exist.

Fraaahnces · 19/07/2023 04:22

Let the mother know that you have camera evidence of her watching while her child harasses you and if it doesn’t stop it will be handed over to the police.

EliflurtleTripanInfinite · 19/07/2023 04:57

Skyisbluegrassisgreen · 19/07/2023 00:00

Squirt them with a hose or bucket of water out of a window.

This could stop them unless it's really hot, but I wouldn't be surprised if the same parents that happily watch them annoy you will get peed off if you soak their DC.

bussteward · 19/07/2023 05:28

Go and make a racket at their door at children’s bedtime.

WandaWonder · 19/07/2023 05:31

I would get them to come in and give them jobs to do around the place

Tiredjoanna · 19/07/2023 05:43

Kids have started this crap where I live and it annoys hell outta me cuz they ring doorbell when my baby's asleep and if you've ever seen my other posts you'll know my baby's the worst sleeper ever. I'd be straight over to call out the parents if I knew whos mine were

BananaSpanner · 19/07/2023 05:46

You don’t want to answer the door, you don’t want to speak to the parents. Realistically how is this going to be resolved?

Go and speak to the mum. State you know her child isn’t the only one but it needs to stop or your going to take the ring doorbell footage to the police and make a case of harassment.

If it doesn’t stop. Keep a log of how often it happens/has been happening. Keep your doorbell footage. If you know the kids that are doing it (even just boy from number 42 etc) then make a note of that each time.

Then after a few days, make a report re 101 or web chat, make a note of your log number then find out who your local neighbourhood policing team is and who the sgt is (your local force may have this on the website) and follow it up with them. Mention you are on your own because your husband died and you think you are being targeted.

It’s anti social behaviour and whilst most people would be able to challenge the kids themselves at least once if you don’t feel you are able, then report it.

Good luck. The only thing I would warn about going from zero action to the police is that it could cause some bad feeling amongst local parents who might feel you could have approached them first (not saying that’s right but…).

cansu · 19/07/2023 06:18

Start by opening the door and speaking to them. I would tell them calmly that it is wrong to disturb their neighbours and that it needs to stop. If it continues go to their parents and ask them to deal with their children. If it continues go to the police or council and report it. Don't answer.

Murdoch1949 · 19/07/2023 06:39

Could you get your dad or a male friend round one evening and rapidly open the door to challenge them? Also contact your community police officer for advice. If you have seen the parent watch it happening there is not much point in you talking to them. Find some support, it's horrible.

determinedtomakethiswork · 19/07/2023 07:10

This must be really horrible for you. It's bullying. You have them on the ring doorbell so I think you have to speak to the mum. If you don't get any luck with her then I'd go straight to the community police.